She waited for my answer. I was a little surprised; I half expected her to hang up the phone after that last piece.
“I understand,” I told her in a small voice. “Thank you.”
I stayed there for another minute after hanging up. My breathing was uneven and my palms were sweating. I wiped them on my jeans.
Until Monday. That only gave me three days, including today.
Just a couple of days to make a potentially life-changing decision. And fess up to Lee and Noah. Totally fine. I could absolutely handle that.
Maybe I could flip a coin?
Back at the table, I could see our desserts had arrived. Lee was waving a spoon around, talking agitatedly at his parents—undoubtedly arguing about the beach house again. Beside him, Noah was nodding, pitching in occasionally to back his little brother up.
Shoving my phone into my back pocket, I returned to the others.
“Back me up here, Elle,” Lee said, interrupting himself midsentence to get me involved. “Berkeley isn’t even that far from the beach house. It’s not even in a different state! Even if we do get summer internships or whatever, they’d probably be around here somewhere. We could totally still make it to the beach house. Right, Elle?”
“R-right.”
A pang of remorse tugged deep in my stomach.
It lessened slightly when I realized Lee had two sundaes in front of him that he’d been digging into in equal measure. He pushed the strawberry one back in front of me.
“Who was that on the phone?” June asked me instead of replying to Lee.
“Oh, uh, just my dad. You know, the usual. Needs me to babysit Brad.”
“Mom, you can’t—”
“Lee, please.” His dad sighed, rubbing a knuckle between his eyes. “This isn’t up for debate. You kids were saying you were thinking about going up to the beach house this weekend, right? How about we all go and start sorting some things out? We’ve gotta clear everything out, clean the place up. Might as well make a start sooner rather than later, huh? Rachel, Elle, we could do with your help, too, of course.”
I bristled slightly at being lumped in with Rachel. Like I was just Noah’s girlfriend. And not like I was part of this family and had spent a bunch of summers at the beach house with them, too. Like they hadn’t said to me a thousand times, “It’s just as much your home here as it is ours, Elle!” and like I hadn’t treated it exactly like that for basically my whole life.
“Happy to help,” Rachel squeaked, sounding like she didn’t have a lot of choice.
“Oh, I’m gonna be there,” I heard myself snapping. June put a hand lightly over mine for a second.
“Fine,” Noah barked.
“But just know,” Lee declared, “we are not happy about this.”
I glowered down at what he’d left of my dessert. Yeah, that’s not all we’re not happy about.
My cell was burning a hole in my pocket. Forget the beach house, I wanted to say. What the hell am I going to do about college?
My gaze slid between the Flynn brothers: Lee, grumbling to Rachel and pouting, looking more hurt than anything else, and Noah, who caught my eye and gave me a crooked smile.
Lee and Berkeley, or Noah and Harvard?
I had only three days to decide.
Chapter Four
After our fancy meal, Noah dropped me off back home. I’d been quiet the whole ride, stewing over this new development about the beach house and my college dilemma. Noah, luckily, had been too busy sulking, so he hadn’t asked what was up with me.
I wanted to tell him so badly.
But how could I? How could I break Lee’s heart like that? And part of me felt like I should make this decision without either of them—but especially without Noah. I didn’t want to go to Harvard just so I could be with my boyfriend or because I let him persuade me into it for that very reason.
This was college. Wherever it was, it would send me down a new path, set me up for the rest of my life from here on out. Whether I picked Berkeley or Harvard, I couldn’t base the decision solely on a boy.
Or, in this case, two boys.
Even though I didn’t want his help to actually make the decision, I wished I could tell Noah. If only so he could hug me, offer some kind of advice, reassure me that it’d be okay, it’d all work out, that Lee would understand if I did ultimately decline my place at Berkeley.
Noah put the car in park while I fidgeted with my house key.
“So I’ll pick you up tomorrow to head to the beach house?”
I almost rolled my eyes and said, No, silly, I’ll be riding with Lee, before remembering that wasn’t how this went anymore. Not because of Noah, but because Lee had a girlfriend to ride shotgun now, in my place.
As if reading my mind, Noah added, “My parents are gonna be driving Lee and Rachel. I was gonna take the bike.”
I grimaced, but it was more playful than anything else. “Oh, come on, you know I hate that two-wheeled death trap.”
“And you really hate having an excuse to cuddle up close to me…,” Noah murmured, the smirk I knew so well tugging at the corner of his mouth as he leaned across the center console toward me.
“Loathe it,” I confirmed. “Utterly and completely.”
He turned his head, his lips brushing over my jaw, making me gasp. My eyes fluttered at the sensation, my skin tingling where his mouth moved lightly up toward my ear. “So I’ll pick you up at nine?”
I nodded, twisting to catch his mouth with mine. I’d never tire of this, I decided. Never. (And if I joined him at Harvard, I’d never have to be away from this feeling….)
Reluctantly, I pulled away eventually. “Are you coming in?”
“Nah. I know Lee was heading home after taking Rachel back to her place, and I’d feel like a terrible son if I left my parents alone with him right now. Even if I’m on his side.”
I couldn’t resist a smirk of my own, and I pushed his shoulder lightly. “Look at you, Noah Flynn, all grown up, making these mature decisions.”
Would I change this much after a year at college, too?
Would Lee?
His cheeks turned a faint shade of pink. “Yeah, yeah, Shelly, get over it. Say hi to your dad and Brad for me.”
“Will do.”
We kissed again—this one not quite as long as the last—before I got out of the car.
I let myself in, Noah idling by the sidewalk in his car until I turned to wave him off, then called out that I was home.