“No reason.” I stepped into the water, wincing at the heat, but I didn’t get out. “I’ve got nothing to say.”
His arms were folded as he leaned against the doorframe. “Do I need to be worried about you leaving me?”
“No. I told you, I’m coming with you.”
“Then what’s the problem?” he asked. “I don’t see what the fuck is the problem.”
“I’m going to miss my best friend, okay? Is that such a problem for you? A mystery? You know I care about her, and I don’t know how long I’m going to be gone. I don’t know anything about how my life is going to be. Can’t you give me some time for that?” I couldn’t help but tense.
“You can still talk to Emily on the phone. How about that?”
It was on the tip of mine to tell him that I’d already negotiated that, but I had a feeling he was going to be pissed.
“Thank you.”
The smirk he gave me had me clenching my hands into fists.
“You don’t think I know you already made that agreement with her?”
“I’m sorry.”
“No need to be. I had every intention of letting you stay in touch.” He stepped into the room, dropping down to his knees beside me.
I couldn’t help but tense up, but all he did was grab the sponge and the soap. Unable to take my eyes away from him, I watched, mesmerized as he started to work the sponge, lathering it up. Why did him washing me feel so intimate? Shouldn’t I feel like he was treating me like a child?
When his hands were on my body, they made me melt. I loved the way he touched me. Each time his fingers grazed across my flesh, I came alive. My nipples felt tight, and he didn’t take his time. He washed me almost mechanically.
He stood when he did my hair, and once I was all done, he grabbed a towel. It was time for me to get out.
I stood, and he helped me out. Wrapping the towel around my body, I stepped into the bedroom, expecting him to take me to bed.
He didn’t.
“I’ll be back,” he said.
Before I could ask him where he was going, he was gone.
I was all alone in the room.
After quickly drying my body, I changed into some pajamas and sat on the edge of the bed. I stared at my hands.
He didn’t order me to stay in the bedroom or tell me to go to sleep. I wouldn’t be breaking any rules.
Without talking myself out of this, I left the bedroom. There was a guard outside, and I lingered, expecting him to tell me to get back inside.
He didn’t.
I made my way downstairs, and ignoring the conversation coming from the library, I went to the kitchen. It didn’t matter whose kitchen it was, it was the one room in the house that made me happy.
The moment I entered, I paused.
Caleb sat at the kitchen counter, nursing a beer.
He looked up at me but didn’t say anything.
“I can leave.”
“Why? I’m not stopping you.”
I stepped further into the room, going to the fridge. I’d gotten accustomed to the kitchen quite quickly. With the milk in my hand, I grabbed a saucepan and poured a mugful into the pan.
Caleb hadn’t left and he wasn’t talking.
I tried to ignore him, but his presence made it impossible. He had always been scary to me.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
He drank his beer while looking at me. This was so hard.
“I’m fine. Why are you out of your room?”
My cheeks heated. I felt them start to warm under his gaze.
“I … I can walk around and do what I want.” Within reason, but I didn’t add that.
“You think I don’t know the kind of man he is?” Caleb asked.
“If I couldn’t leave my room, the guard posted outside would have told me.” I turned my back on him, looking at the milk. It was so easy to overheat milk, and it would just boil over.
“Ashley, do you want to go away with him?” Caleb asked.
Time. That was what I needed.
The milk was nice and warm, and the chocolate chips were in a small container, which I grabbed and measured out a couple of tablespoons. After dropping them into the milk, I did the finishing touches to my hot chocolate, pouring it back into my mug before returning my attention to Caleb.
His gaze was still on me, waiting.
“Tell me,” he said.
“I don’t think this is appropriate.”
He laughed. “You don’t think it’s appropriate?”
“I’m going with Earl.”
“But you didn’t pick him. He’s taken the choice right out of your hands.”
“It’s not like that.” I stared into my mug. It was totally like that. I was taken from a job I loved, and the next thing I knew, I’d woken up on a boat with all of my choices taken away.
“Then tell me what it is like because I’m coming up with nothing.”
Rather than answer him straight away, I took a long sip of my hot chocolate, not even caring anymore if it burned me. Caleb and his friends didn’t care about me when they made this bargain, so why would they care now? Because of Emily? I meant nothing to them.
“This is none of your business.”
“I’m making it my business.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. It wasn’t a pretty sound either. “Really? The same business it was that got me captured in the first place? How you bargained my life for Emily’s? All you and the rest of your friends wanted was her. I didn’t matter.”
“You were safe.”
“You don’t know that. For all you knew, he was going to take what he wanted and throw me out to the ocean.”
Caleb’s fist hit the counter. “No! He’s the one who betrayed our trust, Ashley. Him, not us. We organized for him to be close. He wasn’t supposed to take you out on his yacht, traveling all over the world. You were meant to stay close by for Emily.”
“Well, whatever you bargained, you sold the one thing that was mine. You want to yell at me, to try to make this better, go ahead. I’m not stopping you. It still doesn’t give you the right to demand answers from me when you sold what was mine so easily.”
“Ashley—”
“Can you look in the mirror?”
“What?” he asked.
“It’s a simple question.”
“Of course, I can.”
“What do you see?”
The frown on his face was priceless. I would’ve been laughing long and hard if I found it funny, which I didn’t. Nothing about this was funny to me. I found it irritating. I was tired of him trying to pretend to be the bigger man, the brave man, when the truth was he was neither.
“I really don’t see the point of this.”
Tilting my head to the side, I stared at him. He didn’t flinch or squirm. There was no guilt or remorse.
“Well, I see your father and Emily’s dad.”
“For fuck’s sake.”
“Yeah, go ahead, curse me out. Be angry. Hell, be so fucking infuriated with me. I don’t care. They all at some point make a deal or a bargain with a woman’s innocence. They chose who gets it. Not her. That’s the exact deal you made.” The hot chocolate I’d been enjoying suddenly lost its appeal. “Good night.”