And to think that if he lost everything, he thought he’d be okay as long as we were in his life?
I couldn’t even begin to digest the concept.
Lincoln was the rock for his family . . . and lately for me.
He didn’t need anyone, but it wasn’t just his words that had me stuck in place. It was the way he said them. The rawness, the openness, the unadulterated truth in them.
It was as if he’d ripped his soul open and showed me what it looked like.
I slid down the wall until I hit the floor.
It was too much. I’d been blinded by his inner beauty . . . his honesty.
One second, he’d been bossing me about and the next handing me all the power. Because though he hadn’t said it, I had the choice to stay or go. He’d laid out everything and left what happened next completely up to me.
For a man like Lincoln, freely offering someone else control couldn’t have been easy. Yet he’d confidently spoken every word.
I wasn’t afraid to feel or speak my mind, but I couldn’t have been as candid as he was. Obviously. Since I’d been rendered useless.
“Why are you on the floor?” Eric yawned as he wandered into the foyer. Muffy and Millie were right beside him.
He plopped down next to me and the dogs did the same.
“Lincoln said some things that surprised me.” Absently, I toyed with Muffy’s ear. I wasn’t sure I was ready to repeat his words out loud. For the moment, they were safely rattling around in my brain.
“And you had to sit on the floor because of them?” Eric had such a way of putting things in perspective.
I leaned my head on his shoulder. “Yeah.”
He rested his cheek on top of my head. He was the one who had been upset earlier. I should be the one comforting him. As always, he supported me.
“He’s a good driver. And he can carry a lot of dog food.”
I snickered. “He is useful for that.” I let out a long sigh. “You like him.”
It was a stupid statement. Eric had been taken with him from the first time they met. Why I didn’t know, but he was like a magnet for my brother.
“He’s good people.”
I lifted my head and looked at him. “Where’d you hear that?”
“Pepper,” he said easily.
“She thinks he’s good people too?”
“No. She said we are.”
How fortunate we were. Eric and I had each other, but our circle of people we could count on had expanded.
“She’s good people too.” I put my head back on his shoulder. “How would you feel about living with Lincoln?”
I needed to know how Eric felt about the major decisions we faced.
“Here?” There was wonder in his voice.
“Anywhere.” I wouldn’t burden him with the possibility that Lincoln might lose the apartment until it was certain.
“Is Millie going to live with us too?”
“I think so.” From the way it looked, neither of the dogs were going back to Grey Paws . . . or anywhere without Lincoln.
“Can I stay in the room with the painting I gave him?”
Eric so rarely asked for anything for himself. I couldn’t say no to that, though I wasn’t sure Lincoln would be thrilled.
“We can ask him. But there’s no bed in there.”
“I like the couch.” He stroked Millie’s fur. “Is this because Dad was at our house?”
Pain stabbed at my chest. I didn’t want Eric thinking about that monster.
“No.” I wanted to live with Lincoln. The fact we were protected from our dad was a bonus.
“He can’t put us in the closet here.”
Everything hurt. I’d hoped my brother had forgotten those awful memories.
“They’re never locking us in a closet again.”
“I don’t want him to hurt you anymore.” He petted Millie more erratically. She burrowed her head deeper against his lap.
“He won’t. We’re going to be okay.”
“Because Lincoln won’t let him get to us.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Lincoln
“You’re the last person I expected to hear from.”
Zegas propped his feet on his desk and put his hands behind his head.
“You said you needed to speak to me.”
“But you’ve been pretty occupied. Understandably so.”
I drummed my fingers. Lexie was a beautiful woman. It was impossible not to notice, but I didn’t like that Zegas had.
“Oh, for heaven’s sake. Lighten up. I’m unhappily married and no threat to you.” He dropped his hands and groaned. “Don’t tell me you two are already having a spat.”
She and I had started our relationship arguing, and the one that’d had me storming out of the apartment wasn’t all that monumental. I’d left because I’d confessed too much, too soon and couldn’t stand to face her reaction.
“What is it you want to discuss?” With my behavior recently, if I didn’t steer us to pertinent topics, I’d end up on Zegas’s couch for a therapy session, baring my soul.
He put his feet back on the floor and actually appeared a little apologetic. “What do you remember about your mother’s murder?”
How did he know I’d witnessed it? I didn’t think anyone knew.
It was too late to stop the torrent of memories I couldn’t unsee. I gripped my knees, willing them to go away at least until I was alone.
Late.
I ran from the school to the deli as fast as I could.
The fire alarm had gone off right before the end of the day. I’d tried to sneak away so I could be early for Mother like I was supposed to be, but Mrs. Lewis kept watching the class.
I checked my watch.
Five minutes late.
Which was really twenty-five minutes late. I’d begged her to meet at the deli after school, promised I could make it by myself. It wasn’t far.
When she tells you a time to meet, always be twenty minutes early. Don’t forget. Not even when you’re my age.
I wasn’t supposed to make her wait. Father would be angry when he found out.
The deli came into view. Mother was loading the car with supplies for the picnic. She always had fun ideas. Like a dinner picnic on a school night.
I should sit between Beau and Father so he won’t be mad when she makes a mess. She always makes a mess.
Mother closed the back door of her Cadillac.
Almost there.
I ran faster as she bent over Teague, who was in the front seat. He always sat there, but I didn’t mind.
Someone came up behind her. The person was tall and slender and dressed in all black. It’s too warm for a long coat.
He lifted his arm. A gun gleamed in the afternoon sun.
I opened my mouth to yell, but there was no sound.
Faster. Faster.
I ran as hard as I could.
Crack. Crack.
I stumbled when the gunshot popped. Mother slumped then fell to the ground. I froze. Blood. There was so much blood.
All I could look at was Mother’s face. Her eyes were open but didn’t blink.
I wanted to turn away but couldn’t.
She’s okay. She’s okay.