He didn’t say anything. Maybe he simply wasn’t willing to admit, even now, the truth we both knew.
“Damn it, Aiden,” I growled, frustrated. “I love you. I think I fell in love with you that very first day, when you arrested my ass. I want nothing more than to build a life with you, but I can’t do that. Not like this. Not when at any given moment you can decide that playtime with the witch is over and it’s time to resume the mantle as alpha of your pack.”
“I can’t change what I am.”
“No, but that was never the point. Katie fought the pack and your parents to marry the man she loved. Do you really think she would have done anything different had she not been dying?”
“Had she not been dying, the pack would not have approved.”
“Do you think she would have cared? If you do, then you don’t know your sister very well at all.”
“Liz, listen—”
“No. I’m done listening. I’m done being patient. I’m done torturing myself with the possibility of loving a man who will never admit his feelings or truly commit to me. I want marriage, Aiden. I want kids. And if I can’t have it with you, then this has to end. Now. I’m not going to spend the next one or two or however many damn years it is fearing that the next wolf who walks into the reservation might be the one you leave me for.” Tears were tracking down my face now, but I didn’t care. “I want more than that. I deserve more than that.”
He didn’t say anything for a very long time, then he slowly reached out and thumbed away a tear. “I don’t want to lose you, Liz. I don’t want to lose this.”
“But what are you willing to do to keep it? Marry me? Commit to being a full-time life partner rather than just a bedmate? Because that’s what it’s going to take.”
“Marriage is no guarantee of a happy ever after.”
“No, but at least I’d know where I stand in your life. Right now, I’m in no-man’s land. I’m a lover who shares your bed but not all of your life, and you certainly go to great pains to keep our relationship separate from your pack life.”
“Because—”
“I’m not a wolf,” I finished for him. “And for you, that will always be a major obstacle.”
“It’s not a new revelation, Liz,” he growled, blue eyes glowing fiercely. “I’ve never said or acted in any way to make you believe otherwise.”
“I know. It’s my stupid fault for falling for a man whose heart was always beyond my grasp. But here we are.”
He scrubbed a hand through his hair and looked away. “Damn it, Liz, please don’t do this. Not now.”
“Then when?” I asked fiercely. “Just when is the right time for you to break my heart?”
He cursed, thrust to his feet, and stalked across to the fire, holding out his hands to the flames, though we both knew they didn’t need warming. Tension rode the muscles across his back, and his aura ran with a confusing mix of hurt, anger, and frustration.
“I don’t want this,” he growled.
“To be honest, Aiden, I don’t think you really know what you want.”
He didn’t reply. He didn’t look around.
I sighed, placed my unfinished crumpet back on the plate, then rose and padded over to him. His muscles tensed, but he otherwise didn’t react.
“You know I’m right.”
He didn’t say anything.
“This is goodbye, Aiden.”
“No.” One word, gruffly said.
“Yes,” I said firmly, though my heart and my soul were shattering.
He swore and swung around to face me. He didn’t touch me. He didn’t kiss me, though I could see the desire to do both burning in his eyes. “I need a run. I need to think.”
“I won’t be here when you get back, Aiden.”
“Just wait for me. Please.”
I didn’t reply. He hesitated, then strode for the door, slamming it open and then slamming it closed with equal force.
I felt the shimmer of his change, the long lope of his steps as he chased the fast-disappearing night. Running away from the truth rather than searching for answers.
There were no answers. We both knew that. Not unless he was at least willing to meet me halfway.
I walked upstairs, got dressed, and then grabbed a bag and stuffed everything I could into it. The rest I could come back for either tomorrow or the next day. I hauled it downstairs, swept up my purse, and headed out into the wild night. After dumping the bag in the rear of the Suzi, I opened the driver door and climbed in.
What happened from this point on was up to him.
I reversed out of the parking area and slowly drove away.
And deep in the distance heard the anguished, broken howl of a wolf.
I knew exactly how he felt.
Also by Keri Arthur
in series order
Crown of Shadows (Relic Hunters, 1)
* * *
Blackbird Rising (The Witch King’s Crown, 1)
Blackbird Broken (The Witch King’s Crown, 2)
Blackbird Crowned (The Witch King’s Crown, 3)
* * *
Blood Kissed (Lizzie Grace Series, 1)
Hell’s Bell (Lizzie Grace Series, 2)
Hunter Hunted (Lizzie Grace, 3)
Demon’s Dance (Lizzie Grace, 4)
Wicked Wings (Lizzie Grace, 5)
Deadly Vows (Lizzie Grace, 6)
Magic Misled (Lizzie Grace, 7)
Broken Bonds (Lizzie Grace, 8)
Sorrow’s Song (Lizzie Grace 9)
* * *
Unlit (Kingdoms of Earth & Air, 1)
Cursed (Kingdoms of Earth & Air, 2)
Burn (Kingdoms of Earth & Air, 3)
* * *
City of Light (Outcast Series, 1)
Winter Halo (Outcast Series, 2)
The Black Tide (Outcast Series, 3)
* * *
Fireborn (Souls of Fire Series, 1)
Wicked Embers (Souls of Fire Series, 2)
Flameout (Souls of Fire Series, 3)
Ashes Reborn (Souls of Fire Series, 4)
* * *
Darkness Unbound (Dark Angels Series, 1)
Darkness Rising (Dark Angels Series, 2)
Darkness Devours (Dark Angels Series, 3)
Darkness Hunts (Dark Angels Series, 4)
Darkness Unmasked (Dark Angels Series, 5)
Darkness Splintered (Dark Angels Series, 6)
Darkness Falls (Dark Angels Series, 7)
* * *
Full Moon Rising (Riley Jenson Series, 1)
Kissing Sin (Riley Jenson Series, book 2)
Tempting Evil (Riley Jenson Series, 3)
Dangerous Games (Riley Jenson Series, 4)
Embraced by Darkness (Riley Jenson Series, 5)
The Darkest Kiss (Riley Jenson Series, 6)
Deadly Desire (Riley Jenson Series, 7)
Bound to Shadows (Riley Jenson Series, 8)
Moon Sworn (Riley Jenson Series, 9)
* * *
With Friends Like These (Stand Alone Novel)
* * *
Destiny Kills (Myth & Magic Series, 1)
Mercy Burns (Myth & Magic Series, 2)