She tried to wave her hand, but the weakness in her right side only allowed her to partially raise it. “There are no hot guys here.”
That made me laugh. “Maybe don’t worry about hot guys right now, Mama. Let’s get you right as rain, then you can find your flirt again.”
“Always so sensible, my Mia. What would I do without you?” She reached her arms out for a hug.
I’d heard those words my entire life. Mama always said without me she really would have gone off the rails. But she also had always depended on me to be reasonable. I didn’t mind the role. It fit with my nature well. I hugged her back, hard, trying not to cry. That was why I felt like I was failing her now.
“What’s going on with you?” she asked. “Any guy in your life?”
Her words were slow and stilted, but we both ignored that.
“Since four days ago?” I asked, dryly. “No.” Which of course wasn’t exactly true but I didn’t want to tell my mother about James for the same reasons I hadn’t told James about my mother. It made me feel vulnerable. Which I hated. I didn’t like to feel exposed. I wanted to be in control.
That was also why I never resented working so much. Sure, I was tired all the damn time, but it was safe, predictable. Easy, despite the fatigue. Being emotionally raw was not comfortable at all.
“You’re going to be an old maid,” she said, with a smile.
One of her favorite jokes.
“Looks that way,” I said, smiling back.
“Hey. Can I get…” She took a deep breath and frowned. “What’s it called? The soft stuff you eat that’s cold?”
I kept my expression neutral. “Ice cream?”
“Yes,” she said, looking relieved.
“We’ll get that day one when you come home with me next week,” I promised.
Sitting down, I chatted with her for a few minutes, telling her random stories about Kadin, which she always enjoyed, and giving her the rundown on her favorite reality show about ex-convicts and their love interests. But she was fading out after a few minutes, so I said goodbye and gave her another hug.
In the hallway, the second the door closed, I blinked hard. God, I felt like I was going to cry. I needed to get the hell out of there before I lost my shit.
I was rushing toward the entrance, clutching my bag, when I heard a voice call to me.
“Mia. Your boyfriend is here to pick you up.” It was Jeannette, sounding scandalized and thrilled all at the same time.
“What?” I wiped quickly under my eyes to make sure a sneaky tear hadn’t gotten loose, and turned to see what the hell she was talking about. Or rather, who the hell she was talking about.
It was James, standing at the front desk.
Jeannette was beaming.
James was smiling at me.
I took one look at him and burst into tears.
Chapter Twelve
JJ
“Whoa, whoa,” I said, completely shocked as Mia started crying hysterically, her chest rising up and down rapidly. “What’s wrong?”
I went to her, and to my surprise, she threw herself against my chest and hid her face in my T-shirt as she sobbed. I wrapped my arms around her and ran my hand over her back. “It’s okay, sweetheart.” I hoped it was okay. Jesus, had her mother died?
I had gotten such a weird vibe off of Mia when she’d left that I had done something that might be considered fucked up. I had followed Mia’s bus in my car, Amelia riding shotgun in her crate. When I had realized where Mia was going, I thought maybe she was visiting a grandparent, but I had sweet-talked the receptionist, while making it sound like I knew what the hell was going on. I had told her I was Mia’s boyfriend, there to give her a ride home.
Jeannette the receptionist had taken one look at me and then my ID as I checked in and had been willing to tell me anything. She had chatted about Mia’s mother being on the road to recovery and how devoted Mia was and how I had a good woman in her. It was clear she and the entire staff thought Mia was amazing. I had just started to ask if I could actually go back to the room when Mia had burst out, clutching her bag like a stuffed animal.
I was starting to figure out that bag was more than just a place to store everything she owned. It was also her security blanket.
Now she was in my arms and I was mystified as to why it was happening. I pulled back slightly and used my thumbs to wipe her cheeks. “Hey. What’s going on? Tell me.”
“I’m fine,” she whispered, her words tight.
“Is your mom okay?”
She nodded. “She’s great. She’s being released. Can we just go?”
“Yeah, sure, of course.” I smoothed her hair back and then turned to the front desk. “Thanks, Jeannette.”
“You’re welcome, JJ.” She gave me a big smile. “Now you take care, hon,” Jeannette said to Mia, her face filled with sympathy.
“Thanks, Jeannette. I’ll see you in a few days.”
I led her out of the lobby and into the parking lot. “Amelia will be happy to see you. I have her in her crate in my car with the air-conditioning running.”
Mia wiped her eyes and studied me. “Why are you here? Did you follow me?”
“Yes.”
“So you're stalking me?”
“Basically, yes.” I shrugged. I could admit it. “Something was off when you left and I was worried about you. Okay, and curious.” She’d acted nervous, like she was on her way to a heist. Since I still wasn’t entirely convinced she wasn’t a criminal mastermind, I had wanted to see where she was going. “It was impulsive. I’m sorry for invading your privacy.”
“I’m glad you’re here,” she said. “Thank you for getting me out of there before I embarrassed myself any further. I never cry.” She sighed. “God, that just came out of nowhere.”
“What brought it on?” I unlocked the car door and moved Amelia from the front seat to the back of my SUV. “But sometimes you just need to let your emotions out, you know? You can’t bottle that up forever. That’s what I love about football. I can work out anything in the gym or during practice.”
“My mother is being released from the facility. She had a stroke in April.” She slid into the passenger seat.
“So you’re relieved? That’s understandable. Being released means she’s okay after a traumatic event. The past few months must have been really scary for you.”
She nodded but didn’t say anything else.
I shut the door and went around to the driver’s side. I got in and sat for a second, waiting to see if Mia would say anything else. I had a feeling I knew what was bothering her. But when she didn’t, I turned to her, my hand on her knee, caressing her. “You’re a very strong woman. It’s okay to not be strong once in awhile.”
“You don’t understand. I’ve always taken care of my mother, even as a kid.” Mia’s eyes pooled with tears again. “If I’m not strong, who the hell is going to be strong for me?” she asked, her voice raw.
I felt a wave of tenderness so damn strong I almost wasn’t sure what the fuck to do with it. But looking at Mia, I just knew what I wanted and that was her. I wanted to protect her and take care of her and coax a sassy smile from her.