“He had a scholarship. I couldn’t ask him to stay.” Even if she’d wanted to, which she hadn’t at the time because he’d turned her down. “And he didn’t offer to stay.” A bitterness she hadn’t felt in forever hit her, and she realized River was right. “I’m punishing him for not staying with me. For leaving me behind.”
“And there it is. You even got into a relationship right before he came back so you wouldn’t have to face him without a man on your arm.” River sat back against the headboard. “Honey, you and Ty have been fucked up forever. He was afraid the two of you would fall apart if you tried doing it long distance, and you asked him at the last possible moment because you thought if you were together, he wouldn’t leave you like your mom did. Like all of them did.”
“You could have pointed that out to me.”
“I was a kid, too. I’ve gotten way better at analyzing since I married Jax. I spent a lot of time with a woman therapist who helped him. And that got me to thinking about my friends who were obviously in love and never managed to make it work,” River said. “I also have my theories about our wild man in the woods, but I’m willing to wait and see on that one because the two of you looked hot together tonight. Super hot.”
There went the blush again. “It got out of hand, but I wouldn’t take it back. Honestly, it’s better to know that it won’t work.”
“Well, it can’t if you have that attitude.” River set her glass down. “What do you like about Michael?”
“I like how I feel when I’m around him.” She’d thought a lot about this. “It’s different than Ty. There’s a comfort level with Ty, an easy-going affection that I sometimes think is so engrained in my life I don’t know how I would live without it. Even when I’m mad at him, I know I’ll see him tomorrow and it will be okay. But with Michael, I get to be a slightly different version of me. Sexier. He’s exciting on a physical level, but there’s more to it. I feel like he might need me in a way Ty doesn’t.”
“Oh, I think Ty would say he needs you.”
“Not like Michael does. And not like Michael might need Ty, too.” Lucy finally said the real reason she’d agreed to this crazy plan. “Michael went through something awful, and he needs to learn it’s okay to care about people again, to trust people again, and Ty’s impossible to ignore. He’s that guy who walks in a room and brings sunshine with him.”
Was that what she’d always feared? That if she made the wrong decision she would be left in the dark? That the essential light that had filled her life for so long would be taken from her?
“Then it sounds like you need to talk to them,” River prodded.
“I think Ty made himself very plain tonight. It’s over.” Even if she wanted to try again, he’d slammed that door closed. “Michael is like a wounded animal. He won’t try again. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t head back up to his place and we don’t see him again for a long time.”
“Then I should go tell Jax to take him his keys.” River stood up.
“I thought they would be in his coat pocket.” Was the man standing outside in the cold? She started for the living room. The idea of seeing Michael again hurt her heart, but she couldn’t leave him out there.
Jax was sitting on his sofa, feet propped up on the ottoman and a piece of pizza in one hand. He was watching a soccer game. Apparently he and River had gotten very British during their time abroad. He grinned up at her. “Hey, they’re replaying the Manchester match on satellite.”
“I thought you would like that, babe.” River took a sip of her wine. “I’m going to take Michael his keys. Is he on the porch?”
“Nah,” Jax replied. Buster sat by him, watching that piece of pizza like it was his life’s work. “He and Ty took off. Last I heard they were bitching at each other about bacon or something. I mean Ty wasn’t bitching. Michael was. Carnivores are serious about their bacon. By the way, there’s a mushroom and peppers in the other box. I’m giving the sausage on this one to Buster.”
The vegetarians were in the house. “Where did they go? Michael left his car here?”
“Yep.” Jax went back to watching a bunch of dudes running around kicking a ball. “I think they were going to Ty’s place. Apparently Michael’s rage is no longer white hot enough to heat his cabin, and he’s done with it. That guy should see a therapist.”
Her cell phone buzzed. Lucy walked to the bar and saw what she’d missed before. Michael’s key ring was sitting there. It had a whole bunch of keys on it. More than she would have thought he would carry. There was even one that stood out from the others. It was a custom one with white Js all over a black background.
Jessie. He was still carrying around her keys?
Her cell buzzed again, and she turned it over to see the screen. Michael had sent a text.
On our way back to Ty’s. Don’t worry. He’s already sorry. Thanks for tonight. No matter how short it was. Hope he doesn’t snore. Good night, baby.
He hadn’t left. He’d left her, but he hadn’t left them. He was with Ty.
He’d practically told her he would take care of Ty.
She stared at the words for the longest time.
Chapter Six
Michael looked around the elegantly appointed dining room and thought about how he’d aspired to this level of wealth once. Maybe not this level, exactly. Stefan Talbot’s kind of wealth tended to be generational, but at least he’d aspired to having a dining room where he could sit down with friends and family and celebrate holidays and birthdays.
He had a folding table, and he only had that because Nell had brought it to his cabin and unfolded a plain tablecloth and set up two chairs.
He’d ignored it, preferring to eat his shitty dinners in the rocking chair that was going to fall apart at any moment.
“I do smell bacon, Mike.” Ty looked nervous and had ever since they’d driven up to the circular drive.
They’d been shown to this dining room and told the rest of the party would be in soon. Mr. Talbot, the housekeeper had explained, was dealing with a minor domestic emergency and they should help themselves to coffee.
Ty was a weirdo.
Fuck. He needed to stop thinking that way. He was complex. Ty was naïve about so many things, and then he had insights that kind of set Michael back. He was the single kindest human being Michael had met in a long time, and he couldn’t trust it because he’d been burned before. He didn’t think he could believe in Ty’s goodness because he hadn’t seen Jessie’s badness.
But hadn’t he? He’d mistaken narcissism for self-centeredness. He’d looked for the good in her sea of red flags because he’d wanted her.
“I feel like I’m about to get fired. Can Stef fire me from Bliss?” Ty started pacing. “Like I won’t be able to go to Trio or hang out at Stella’s? I know I don’t buy a ton of groceries, but I get them at the Trading Post.”
“Stef isn’t going to kick you out of Bliss.” Michael grabbed a cup and poured some of the rich-smelling coffee in. “Do you want coffee? Maybe you shouldn’t have caffeine.”