The beginning of the end…
* * *
“I don’t like it.”
Breck shifted the hair off the nape of my neck and planted a lingering kiss along my skin, sending shivers down my back.
I was going over the schematics of our route one more time. Instead of waiting for Nix to come after me, I was going after him. It should be quick and surgical. Something about the plan and the timing seemed too easy. I’d gone over it so many times, but something in my gut just said this wasn’t going to work.
Breck was doing his level best to distract me. “Oh, really? You sure about that? Because the past few days have shown that when I kiss your neck like that, you do, in fact, like it.”
He nipped my skin then, and I shivered. “You know full well I like you kissing me. It’s the plan. It’s making me uncomfortable. I don’t know... Something’s off.”
“I know something’s off.” I turned around slowly in his arms, and he leaned down to place a soft, lingering kiss on my lips. “Just let Wilder give you the men.”
“Breck, we’ve been over this. He’s given me two of his guys already. I think it’s plenty. I’ll be there. Niko too. We’ll keep it tight. In and out, pick him up. Everything’s going to be fine, I promise.”
He ground his teeth and pushed to his full height, forcing me to crane my neck to stare up at him as I continued. “Don’t be like this. You know I can do this.”
The muscle in his jaw ticked. “Forgive me if I don’t want the woman I—” He stopped abruptly.
I frowned. “The woman that you what?”
He cleared his throat. “You know that I don’t do this, right?”
The pit in my stomach fell a few more feet. “Do what?”
He shook his head. “Do this. Relationships. Let myself get close to someone.”
I sighed. “Is that what we’re doing? Having a relationship?”
More ticking in the jaw, and this time he crossed his arms. I could physically see his shields going back up. Well, tough titties. I wasn’t exactly here for the vulnerability and broken-heart shenanigans either. “Sparrow. We’ve been through this. That’s what I’m trying to do here. Probably not well, and I warned you I wouldn’t be great at this. But I am trying.”
I forced my muscles to relax. He was trying. He was saying the right things and going through the right motions. They might not be perfect, but I had to accept them as they were. Because I wanted him. But shit, I was terrified. What if this was real? An actual real relationship. Could it even be that? Was either of us capable of being more, of giving more?
“I just... I’m worried about you. This doesn’t feel good.”
I pushed to my feet, but he didn’t back away. The tight confines forced my breasts to push up against his chest. “It doesn’t feel good for me either. You don’t think I’m scared?”
His brow furrowed. “You don’t look scared. You look contained. As per usual. And believe me, I have full faith in you. I believe that you can do anything. If you wanted to, you could move a mountain. And I would be right there supporting you. I just don’t want you to break every bone in your body as you move that mountain.” He was so warm, and he smelled so damn good. The scent of sandalwood wrapped around me, infusing my whole body with his scent, like he’d marked me. Like I would never be able to walk the earth again without smelling his scent lingering on my skin.
“You believe in me?”
His nod was firm. “Absolutely and unequivocally. I want you to be careful. And I know you hate it, and I’m not that guy, so I’m not going to tell you what to do, or go behind your back to my brother and force Wild to give you more men, or try and tell you how to do what I know you’re good at. But, for the love of God, I can ask you to be careful. As someone I care about, which is, let me point out, a very limited list. Before you, that list was three. Now it’s four. Four and a half if you count Kannon. The jury’s still out on him.”
My lips quirked up in a smile. “That’s the thing, Breck. You pretend you don’t care, but you do. You care about your people. I see it. You care about your employees. I’ve seen how you worry about the bottom line, what that means for them. You could easily sell your company for millions, but you don’t because, in that scenario, only you make out like a bandit. Your employees would be left with barely anything. And that wouldn’t sit right with you. I know you, Breck Waterford. I can see you.”
He shifted on his feet, and his gaze slid away. “You know that makes me uncomfortable.”
“Unfortunately, you see me too.”
“Yes, I do. And I know better than to tell you what to do, but please for the love of Christ, get more men. Take more men.”
I knew what he was trying to say. I knew why he was trying to say it. I knew that he cared about me. I just also knew that this needed to be meticulous, with the precision of a surgeon’s blade. If we went in with too many men, Truman Nix might get tipped off, and if he saw us coming, he might escape. Any manner of things could go wrong. And I couldn’t have that.
“How about this. If I get that feeling, the weird anxiety I can’t name, I promise I’ll pull out. The guys and I will pull out. I will let you and Wild do what you want and put more security on me. I will call Kannon.”
His brows popped. “What?”
I shrugged. “Yeah, yeah, I know. I swore I wouldn’t call him. But if it comes to that, I will.”
“You’re sure?”
I knew what he wanted to hear, that I would absolutely call Kannon. And I planned to, unless I determined it was more dangerous for Kannon to be here. And by extension, more dangerous for London. But for now, I nodded. “Yes. So please, can I do my job?”
I could tell he was grinding his teeth, but he nodded. “I’m not sure I like this.”
“You already said that.”
“No. This whole compromise thing. I’m not used to it,” he pouted.
I looped my arms around his neck, then pressed a kiss to his lips. “Well, the good news is, now that you’ve compromised, I will reward you.”
He smiled. “Oh?” His hands slid around my waist and down to my ass. “How much time do we have left before you need to gear up?”
I laughed. “We don’t have that much time.”
He placed a finger on my lips. “Then shush. My turn. My turn involves lots of kissing. I mean, if you can be very quiet, my turn will also involve my cock inside of you. Ever had a quickie on your desk?”
I laughed. “No. And Niko’s right outside. So are James and Adam, the guys Wilder sent over. I cannot shag you in my office.”
His gaze grew dark then. “Yes, yes you can.”
“I have to gear up. Strap on my weapons. I can’t be all jellied out because you’ve sapped my energy.”
“Yes, you can. Like I said, shush. I need to put my tongue and my fingers and my dick somewhere very, very fun. And you have to stay very, very quiet.”
“Breck,” I said in a warning, but he was already leaning down, his hands sliding up my back to the nape of my neck, angling me just how he wanted as his hands fisted in my hair.