I can only imagine.
Going from everything to nothing, that is going to be a pretty big shock to the system.
I breathe out, but it does nothing to relieve the heaviness in my chest.
So much has happened, I don’t even know what to do with it.
I close my eyes, taking a deep, shaky breath. “Where to from here?”
“Forward, babe. There is only forward.”
Right, forward.
But where does that lead?
24
It has been three weeks since everything went down with Delilah’s family.
Her father has been arrested and is awaiting trial. So are all the people involved. The gossip around town is huge and Delilah has told us that because her mom has been proven to have had nothing to do with it, she should get something to keep her afloat. She won’t be left with nothing, and their savings and home should be left with her unless it is proved that she was involved.
Still, being out in town has ruined her. People are reporting horrible things, her friends have turned on her and she’s the talk of the town. It’ll take a long time to recover, but she will recover. Eventually. Delilah will, too. She has taken it on with broad shoulders, she had her breakdown and then she came together for her mother and showed strength I didn’t think she had.
She’s a damned warrior.
“I want to talk to you two about something.”
I’m in the kitchen with Hugh and we’re cooking some food, when Delilah comes in with Star. She looks like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders, but she’s keeping it together. I wasn’t expecting her today, she wanted to take a day off and just spend it with Star alone, so I’m surprised to see her here.
“What’s up?” Hugh asks, pausing what he’s doing to look at her. “Is Star okay?”
“She’s okay, yeah. I wanted to talk to the two of you. I’ve been thinking and...I want to present something to you both. Something I think will completely change all of our lives.”
I glance at Hugh, and he narrows his eyes.
“We’re listenin’.”
Delilah exhales, closes her eyes and then, after a moment, opens them and begins to speak. “I want to go with Maggie.”
I blink, confused. “Pardon me?”
“I can’t be here anymore. This life...it’s destroying me. It’s not going to get better anytime soon. I want to do something for myself, for Star, and I have thought a lot about it. I know Hugh won’t leave, because Star is here, so...I want us all to go. I want us to go to Canada.”
I blink, not sure I’ve heard her right. Surely this is a dream. It can’t be real. She...she wants us all to go together. Is that even possible? I don’t understand. I’ll have a permanent job, so it’ll be easy for me to go, but what about the other two? Will Hugh even want to go? My mind is swimming.
“I know you’re both shocked, and I know it’s a lot to ask but...we’ve become like this little family, and I don’t want to split us apart. Star loves you, Maggie, and I want you in her life. I want you two to stay together and I want to get the hell out of this town. I have a job there, my family have ties everywhere, and I’ve already made arrangements. I’ll get a house, close by, and we can...we can just start again.”
I look to Hugh, with hope in my eyes. He’s staring at Delilah, his face blank, but I can tell it’s out of shock and nothing else. Then, he looks to me. I hold my breath. I hang onto it for dear life, wondering what he’s going to say next.
“You want this, Maggie?”
“Do I want this?” I cry, pressing my hands over my mouth so I don’t scream and cry at the same time. “Of course I do. I want this more than you’ll ever know.”
He exhales, looking back to Delilah. “You’re sure about this choice?”
“I’m surer about it than I have been about anything in my life, Hugh. It just comes down to you, I know you have the club, so the decision is yours. I’ll not take Star from you, so whatever you decide...”
He glances between the two of us. “All of us, together? A family?”
“Yes,” I say, swallowing the lump in my throat.
I feel like I’m going to jump out of my skin with anticipation of his answer.
“I’ll talk to Riggs, but there are chapters everywhere and I’m certain he won’t give a fuck. So yeah, let’s fuckin’ go to Canada.”
I scream, launching myself into his arms. He catches me, hanging onto me so tight I can hardly breathe but I don’t care, oh, no, I feel like my entire world just came together in the most beautiful package. Together, all of us. The love of my life. Star. Delilah. The perfect job. The perfect start to our new lives.
It doesn’t get better than this.
There isn’t a single thing in the world that could take away from this moment.
This moment of pure joy and happiness.
“You’re really sure?” I say to Delilah, swiping my tears.
“Yes,” she cries happily, “yes, I’m so sure. Only if you two will have me, of course.”
I grab her, pulling her in for a hug. “Of course we’ll have you. My god, you’ve changed my life. You’ve changed our lives.”
She pulls back, wiping away her own tears. “You two have become the best family I’ve ever known, and you’ve taught me so much about myself. I like the person I’m becoming, and I want to see what the world holds for me.”
“I get to see Star every day,” I whisper, then hiccup with a sob.
“Every day,” Delilah smiles.
“Fuck, thank you,” Hugh says to her, giving her the most genuine look he’s ever given. “Seriously, Delilah. I’ll never be able to tell you what this means.”
This morning I woke up with a heavy weight in my chest at the thought of having to leave the man I’m falling in love with, the baby I’m obsessed with and the girl I’m becoming friends with.
Now, I’m going to end the day with a new hope, a new light, a new family and a new life.
The universe really does work in mysterious ways, and it just gave me everything I could have ever asked for.
I’ll be forever grateful.
“WHAT’S WRONG, DORIS?” Eve asks, as we all sit down around the table at Wildflowers.
Delilah, Hugh and I leave tomorrow and we’re all having one last get together before we do. We’re going to start here at the café and then move to the club for Hugh’s send off. He’s going to be joining a chapter in Canada. It isn’t a direct chapter, but it’s a club that Riggs has a lot to do with and they were more than happy to patch him in. Delilah has a job at a big accounting firm, which she’s super excited about, and she has secured a house just up the road from the one I’m being provided with.
We are all growing together and it’s damned beautiful.
“It’s nothing dear, take a seat.”
I glance over at the old woman standing before our two full tables, a shawl thrown over her shoulders, her walking stick in hand, the brightness in her eyes still there, even though she looks like she’s about to tell us some really bad news. Eve stands, her face scrunched with fear, like she knows something is about to crush her.