“They’re okay.” Nova says before I can ask for the millionth time. I’m like that kid in the car that keeps asking if we’re there yet.
“You don’t know that.” With each second, I lose a bit of hope. I hate that. I want to have all the faith in the world when it comes to Logan. But it’s been over a week now. I’m not sure this is something I can spend my life doing. Worrying that every time he walks out the door I might never see him again. Right now it’s only me, but what will happen when the baby comes? I don’t think I can bear him putting his life in danger all the time.
Nova gives me a frank stare. “Trust me. Logan is the best. Getting him to take me on is the equivalent of getting into some top-notch Ivy League college.”
“Really?” That shouldn’t make me smile, but it does. I love that Nova has so much respect for him. I know that she wouldn’t if it wasn’t well earned.
“Don’t tell him I ever said that.” She points one of her perfectly-painted pink nails at me. They're perfect because I’m the one that gave her a manicure. I’ve been so worried about the guys that Nova has let me give her a makeover twice now.
“You’re not worried about Ben?” I walk over and sit beside her.
“Why would I be worried about him?”
“Cause you two are in love with each other.”
“We are not!” She jumps from the bench.
“Careful!” She’s going to hurt herself.
“I’m fine.” She walks over to another bench and starts to do some weird stretch.
“So then you don’t care that Melanie from the fourth floor asked me about him awhile back?” Nova slowly turns back around. I swallow when I see the look on her face. “I made that up. Don’t kill anyone,” I blurt out quickly. Probably not the best idea to tease a trained killer.
“It’s not like that between us.”
I raise one of my eyebrows at her, letting her know I’m not buying what she’s selling. “Could have fooled me. Then how is it between you guys?”
“We work together.” She shrugs.
“I thought you said you and I are really friends?” I follow her.
“We are.”
“Well, friends share these kinds of things.” I reach out and pull on the end of her braided hair. I did that to her too. I find myself wanting to take care of her now. Especially when she told me about her childhood.
“Not used to sharing things.” She sinks her teeth into her bottom lip. For the first time I’m seeing a not-so-confident Nova. As much as I love that she’s showing it to me, I hate that she’s so unsure about loving someone.
“I didn’t grow up like you guys, but my parents kind of sucked. I actually think Logan won my father over with money.”
“He did,” she grumbles.
“I honestly don't care. Logan didn’t have to do that. I was going to say yes to marrying him whether my father agreed or not. Seeing how my parents are with each other, I knew I didn’t want what they had. I wanted more. I chose love, and it’s the best decision I’ve ever made.”
“It’s scary.” Nova rubs her eyes. “I see how happy and different Logan is since he found you. As much as I want that for myself, I also see that if something happened to you it would kill him. I can bear a lot of things. Hell, I already have, but I don’t know if I could bear actually finding love and then losing it.”
“What if something happens to him today or tomorrow? Then what? You’ll be okay knowing you never took a chance? Or that you never told him how you feel about him?”
Nova’s eyes widen a fraction.
“If you’re already in love with him, what is there really to lose?”
“I…” She trails off.
I finally voice what I’ve been thinking ever since Logan walked out the door. “Could we all leave this behind? Would that be too much to ask?”
She looks almost perplexed. “It’s all we know.”
“Just because it’s all everyone knows doesn’t mean we can’t go in a different direction. Or want something more. But I don’t want to make anyone be something they’re not. If this is what you want from life, then I’m not going to change it.”
“Honestly, since meeting you Quinn, I’m not sure what I want in life anymore.”
“Think about it.” I step into her, wrapping my arms around her in a hug. She hugs me back. “And Nova, I love you.” I turn my head, kissing her cheek. “You’re already loved by someone.”
“I love you too.” She hugs me tighter. “They better come back.”
“They will.” This time it’s me being strong for her. “Love always wins.”
It better. Or I’ll kill my husband myself.
22
Logan
“You need a hospital.”
I cough, and blood splatters on my hand. “No.”
“Boss, we can’t just go back to the warehouse and—”
“We’re going.” I jolt as Ben lands roughly, getting the job done as he cuts the engines and slows our speed.
“If I take you back and you die in Quinn’s arms, she’s not going to be happy.”
I sit up, ignoring the pain in my ribs. We barely made it out of the shit in the desert. But not before I made my mark. A week of picking off those assholes, stalking them, and destroying them. It all ended with a bang. Literally. We blew up one of their outposts and fought off half a dozen of them in hand-to-hand combat.
Ben winces as he opens the airplane door. He’s fucked up too. Took a bullet in the shoulder and a blade to his hand.
“You don’t want to get back to Nova?” I ask as I follow him out of the small plane and land—still pretty steadily—on my feet.
“I do.” He grabs our beat-up duffle bag and throws it over his good shoulder. “But we look like ten pounds of shit stuffed into a five-pound bag.”
I’m not too worried about my appearance. I used to always clean up before going home. But now that Quinn knows the truth, I’m going straight to her. These days apart have been a living hell. Even though I’ve been wreaking havoc on the assholes who attacked us, every moment I’ve spent without Quinn is one I regret. Simply because I can’t get that time back.
“Do you think Nova gives a shit what you look like right now?” I ask.
He shrugs. “I mean, I always look good.”
I take in the swollen lip, black eye, bandaged hand, and the rest of his injuries. “We’re alive. That’s all that’ll matter to them.”
We load into my SUV, and I head for the driver’s seat, another cough wracking me.
“I got this.” He guides me around to the passenger side. “If I don’t get you back alive, Quinn will kill me. No, thanks.”
“She wouldn’t hurt a fly.” I say it, then realize she might do just what Ben says. There’s a strength inside her, one she doesn’t even realize. I think it’s why I was so drawn to her in the beginning. Trusting another person—especially a person like me—that takes a steel spine. Dangerous acts and rough living aren’t true indicators of bravery. Of strength. It’s trusting someone else with your heart, it’s being kind and caring even though you could get hurt—those are what really make a person tough. And Quinn has all that in spades.