It proves excruciatingly difficult, the more time goes on, to keep my hands off Amanda. I try to take my cues from David, messing with her when he’s initiating the horse play. But every now and then, when we’re just talking in a semi-circle or floating on our backs, I find ways to be close to her without anyone noticing.
A brush of our bodies as I swim past her, holding on a little longer than necessary when we’re all dunking each other, holding my hand out to help her up the embankment when we’re ready to dry off and lay in the sun.
We eat and chat with David and Julia, then we take Tucker out into the water in his lifejacket, both laughing at his facial expressions as he discovers what everything feels like for the first time.
Eventually, it’s just me and Amanda in the water, everyone else up on shore talking and snacking while we drift out into the cove a bit deeper.
“So,” she says, fingertips gliding along the top of the water as she swishes and sways. “I guess we can knock this one off the list.”
“I guess we can,” I agree. “What’s next?”
She taps her chin. “Hmm… tattoo?”
I balk. “Really?”
“Why not? You scared?”
I laugh, squinting against a ray of sunlight peeking through the trees as we circle each other in the water. “I don’t know that scared is the right term for it, but I’m a little freaked out by the premise of marking my skin permanently forever.”
She waves me off. “It’s not that big of a deal. Everyone thinks you need to have all this meaning behind every tattoo you get.” She shrugs. “Why not just have art on your skin because art is pretty? And fun? And maybe you like things that are pretty and fun?”
I smile, eyes washing over her. “Fair point. What do you want to get, then?”
“A bird, maybe,” she says, looking up at the sky as if to try to spot one now. “Or a star. Maybe a flower. Maybe I’ll just go in and tell the artist to do whatever they want.”
There’s something about that moment, about the way the water reflects little waves of light on her chest and arms, how her eyes somehow soak in the color of the sky, a blue edge to those brown irises.
Last time I saw her, she was broken down and defeated.
Now… she looks happy, like it’s all forgotten, like she’s been reborn into a new life where it never happened at all.
She’s beautiful. Resilient.
Free.
I roll my lips together, glancing at the shore to make sure everyone is still locked in conversation before I step closer to her.
“And where do you want it?” I ask, voice low, eyes skating over the length of her.
Her smile slips when she realizes how close I am now, how our body heat is suddenly reachable even through the chill of the water.
She doesn’t answer.
“Maybe… here?” I ask, tenderly brushing her wet hair off her shoulder. I glide my fingers over the curve before they disappear under the water. “Or… here?” I ask again, just barely brushing her rib cage under the hem of her top.
Amanda sucks in a shaky breath, her eyes flicking to mine as my hand continues its descent.
“One here could be cute,” I suggest, tickling the top of her hip bone.
She exhales in little puffs, her lips parting, and a thick swallow strains her throat.
“Or,” I continue, searching her gaze as I step in a little closer. I walk my fingers down over her thigh, sliding them just a little inward to touch the smooth, sensitive skin now breaking out in goosebumps. “Maybe here.”
My eyes flick to the shore. David doesn’t seem to notice, nor does Julia — they’re both too focused on where Tucker is making faces as he eats a Cheeto.
It’s then that I feel the weight of Josh’s gaze.
He’s been quiet all afternoon, sitting with Tucker and Julia on the shore and drinking his beers. He hasn’t caused a scene, which I’m thankful for, but he’s like a buzzing mosquito, annoying purely because he exists.
And right now, he’s got his narrowed eyes locked right on me, an evil grin on his face.
Reluctantly, I swim backward, putting space between us as Amanda lets out an almost pained breath at the loss. Her next breaths are ragged, and she clears her throat, dunking under water before emerging on the surface again with a forced smile.
“I’m thinking maybe my ankle,” she says quickly, and then she starts making her way back to the shore without so much as another glance in my direction.
I wait in the water until all evidence of how much I enjoyed guessing where Amanda might get her tattoo is… settled, and then I join everyone on the shore for the last of the birthday festivities. We have a little cake for Tucker and let him smash his fingers in it before Julia hastily cleans him off. Then, we start loading back up, ready to float down the river back to the dock.
David and Julia kick off the embankment first, the current washing them down the river as David uses the paddle just to steer. It’ll be easy floating on the way back.
“Hop in and I’ll push us out,” I tell Amanda, keeping my attention on her and away from Josh — whom I can feel staring at us.
“You sure? I can get in once it’s in the water.”
“It’ll be easier this way.”
She shrugs, situating herself in the front of the kayak. Before I can push us off, Josh lets out a sinister chuckle from where he’s still lounging on the sand.
“Careful there, Greg. Don’t pull a muscle.”
I pause with my hands on the back of the kayak, noting how Amanda tenses up at the insult. He doesn’t have to say it for us to know he means be careful trying to lift that kayak with her in it.
I stand, cracking my neck as I turn to face him.
“Oh, ready to fight now, champ?” Josh teases, standing, too. He wobbles a bit as he does. “Go ahead. Take a swing. I know you want to.”
“Greg,” Amanda warns, reaching out to tug on my shorts. “Let’s just go.”
Josh notes the touch and snarls, shaking his head. “You’re pathetic, Amanda. Fucking our son’s friend, now?”
My nose flares at that. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, don’t I? Because anyone with eyes can see that you two are fucking.”
“We’re not fucking,” Amanda says, standing and crossing the sand to put her finger right in Josh’s chest. “And even if we were, it’s none of your business.”
“Really? Because last I checked, we’re still married.”
“Only because someone is dragging their feet on signing the papers.”
“That’s because someone else is trying to suck me dry — and not in the good way you used to when you were young, my love.”
I nearly crack a tooth with how hard I grit my teeth, but I don’t dare move — not when Amanda isn’t even fazed by the comment.
She smirks. “Trust me, as soon as I get my degree and get a job, I’ll be the first one to go to the judge and tell her I don’t need your money anymore.”
“If you get your degree.”
“I will,” she says instantly. “And you’re just pissed because you can’t stop me. Not anymore.”
She turns on her heels then, getting back in the kayak without waiting for his response. I glare at Josh before shaking my head and reaching down to push her off the shore.