Laurie’s mouth tightened, and I knew, somehow, that it was in reaction to hearing the shift in my voice. The vulnerability I usually fought so hard to hide.
Maybe he answered my question because he felt sorry for me. If that was the case, I’d still take it.
“When you said Belanor’s name, I assumed you would be in one of the cells beneath the palace,” Laurie said, meeting my gaze. “But only the heir or the Queen Regent has the authority to access the prisoners, much less set any of them free. Information about them is also highly confidential, as well. I used my connections to confirm your presence, and then I followed the other breadcrumbs Belanor had dropped along his way to the throne. I soon discovered that he’d resurrected the Games, a practice I’d abolished long before I was even king. I attended just a few hours later, intending to bargain with Belanor for your freedom, and then I saw you down on the sand.”
Now Laurie’s voice had changed, too. Suddenly I was back in the arena, staring up at the silver prince as if he were a brightly shining star. I hadn’t known that Laurie was afraid, but as he remembered that moment, there were faint wisps of it in the room with us. Surrounding him. Teasing me.
“Once the fight was over, and you were carried out of there unconscious, I immediately began work on your escape. I obtained a blueprint of the passageways and reviewed the routes myself. This eventually led me into the cherubim den, which I decided to use to our advantage. You know the rest. Well, the significant bits, anyway,” Laurie added. “There was a lot of other planning involved, too, like guard shifts and distractions. Turning the cameras off and getting identification for the elevator, that sort of thing. If there were an award for heist planning, I would obviously be a recipient.”
I made an absent sound. “There’s one thing I don’t understand… well, there are a lot of things I don’t understand, actually, but one thing that’s been bugging me since your mother left. You went to all that effort to hide your part in my escape, Laur. You were willing to endanger our lives to hide it. If it’s that important, why on earth would you go to a ball with me? Sorry to break it you, but no mask is going to hide your identity.”
“You’re not thinking like a faerie, Sworn. I went to ‘all that effort,’ as you say, because anyone caught helping a prisoner escape is subject to the old laws. I was simply covering my own ass, because it’s quite a nice ass and I’m very fond of it.” I opened my mouth to launch into my next round of questions when Laurie spoke over me. “If it did somehow become public knowledge that a prisoner had gotten free, and it was also learned you were that prisoner, of course it would be natural to see us together at the event and assume I’d played a part in everything. But it can’t be proved, and that is what matters at the Seelie Court. I can’t be linked to Fortuna Sworn, the prisoner. Therefore, I am free to attend as the Seelie Prince, and why shouldn’t I bring a guest? It is a party, after all. We’ll dally for a bit, see and be seen, and then you’ll make your departure. Simple.”
We both knew it wouldn’t be that easy.
“What do you get out of it? Why be there at all?” I asked bluntly.
Laurie sighed. “There are several reasons. The first of which being that, should my brother make an appearance, he will not be able to claim you while you are on another male’s arm. I could ask one of my associates to be your escort, if you’d prefer, though they probably won’t deter Belanor or any other ambitious courtiers in that room. Lensa may not keep up with current events, but the same cannot be said for the rest of this gossipy bunch—they’ll know about what happened at Viessa’s coup.”
Meaning everyone knew I’d dumped Collith. Like it or not, my relationship with him had provided a small amount of protection.
I was still deep in thought when my attention landed on Laurie again. It took longer than it should have to realize he was staring at my cleavage. I felt my mouth part, but nothing came out. He dragged his eyes up to mine, unsmiling. His arm was still raised over his head, lending tension to the rest of his hard body, and as the seconds ticked past, I could see Laurie’s breathing shift in the rise and fall of his sculpted stomach. A sensation went through me, deep and sensual. It left a trail of unrest in its wake.
“Stay over there, if you know what’s good for you,” I warned finally, grateful that I sounded unaffected by the heat in that long look.
“I do know what’s good for me, yes,” Laurie agreed.
The statement felt unfinished, somehow, as if invisible words were floating through the air. I shot him another halfhearted glare, then pulled the covers over me. They were heavenly against my skin, and I let out another sigh, this one made of pure relief. With Laurie next to me, his scent all around, I felt… safe.
But there was someone important to me who didn’t get to feel that way. Right now he was probably scared and alone. The moment I closed my eyes, I saw Finn’s face.
Then I thought of Gil, who was becoming something I didn’t fully understand. I could still feel the sensations pulsing from his side of the bond, and they felt like… death.
“Your story,” I said abruptly, staring up at the vaulted ceiling. Laurie turned onto his side, and I did the same without thinking. It was instinctive. Involuntary. As if Laurie had caught hold of something inside me and held the other end in his grasp, tugging it with his every word and movement. His expression was fathomless, not because of the dimness of the room, but due to the careful blankness he now wore. I stared at the firelight flickering along the edge of his face, thinking for the hundredth time about how beautiful Laurie truly was. I forgot, sometimes, and it would hit me all over again, as it was in this moment.
He was still waiting for me to finish the question I’d started. Now I wasn’t sure I wanted to, but I knew it would haunt me. “Was it about him?” I made myself say.
Laurie didn’t ask who I meant. “Actually, the prince in that particular story was me,” he said.
He didn’t expand upon this, and it was obvious he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I thought about what he’d told me. It had been a glimpse, however small, of Laurie’s real life. A look behind the velvet curtain. He traded in secrets and strategies. Until, one day, he met someone who reminded him of what he’d forgotten. Of what he had allowed himself to forget.
Had Laurie been talking about Collith? Or… me?
It was the only question I left unspoken. Laurie and I lay there, both of us breathing so quietly that I couldn’t hear even the faintest wisps of air. The fire burned low in the hearth. Now and then, it gave a halfhearted crackle.
“How is my kitten?” I whispered. I wasn’t sure why I suddenly felt the need to lower my voice, but it still felt loud in the stillness. I pictured the small creature I’d been forced to leave behind. I’d barely had any time with him before the cherubim captured me. I hadn’t even gotten to name him.
“He’s a cheeky bastard,” Laurie muttered back. “Ruined my favorite pair of pants yesterday.”
The corners of my mouth twitched. “How did you end up owning an animal shelter, anyway?”
Laurie rolled onto his back, moving his arm so it pillowed his head. His chest moved, as if he were sighing again, but I didn’t hear the sound of an exhale.