He held my gaze before finally speaking. “I don’t want more, Georgia. I’m sorry.”
It felt like I’d been smacked across the face. I jumped out of the chair and stumbled back from the momentum. Max reached out, like he wanted to steady me.
I put my hands up. “Don’t.”
“Georgia…”
I felt tears brewing like a storm about to hit. But I refused to allow them. Instead, I swallowed and straightened my spine. “It’s fine. Just…just go sit down. Let me have a minute, and I’ll finish making us dinner.”
“Would you rather I go?” Max asked softly.
I shook my head. “I’ll be fine. I just need a little space right now.”
• • •
Dinner was awkward, to say the least. I responded when Max spoke, but I didn’t have the energy to carry on any real conversation. After, we cleaned up in more silence. I stood at the kitchen counter and refilled my glass, while Max declined more wine.
“Thank you for making dinner.”
“You’re welcome.” I stared down into my wine. “Do you still want to see each other until you leave in a few weeks?”
Max frowned. “The selfish asshole in me wants to say yes, but I don’t want to make it harder for you. I’ll do whatever you want.”
I wasn’t sure it made a difference if we said goodbye today or in a month. The damage was done. I’d fallen for him. “I think I’d like to enjoy the time we have left.”
Max let out a big breath. He looked physically relieved. “Can I hold you?”
I nodded.
He walked over hesitantly, almost as if he was waiting for me to change my mind, and then looked into my eyes, asking silent permission before wrapping me in his arms. My head pressed against his chest, right over his heart. As crazy as it was, being in his arms made everything feel like it would be okay, even when he’d caused the hurt in the first place. For now, I could let him make me feel better, putting off the day that nothing could help because he was no longer here.
Later that evening might’ve been the first time we climbed into bed like normal people. Typically, we’d fall in, stumbling to rip off each other’s clothes as we went. But tonight, Max took off his own clothes, and I changed in the bathroom like I’d do if I were alone. Slipping into bed without that passion actually reminded me a lot of my years with Gabriel.
I turned to my side, giving Max my back, and he curled up behind me. Even though my mind just wanted to drift off to sleep, having Max’s hard chest pressed so close made my body betray me. My skin prickled, and my nipples hardened as his warm breath tickled my neck. I stayed still with my eyes shut, trying to ignore the urge to turn and dig my nails into his back. But when I felt Max harden against my ass, it became all but impossible. I took a deep breath in and let out a frustrated rush of air.
“Sorry,” he whispered. “I’m not trying anything, I swear. I thought I could control it, but apparently I have as much restraint as a twelve-year-old boy.”
I smiled sadly. “It’s okay.”
Max leaned his forehead against the back of my shoulder. “I’m going to go…take a quick shower. Get things under control.”
Great. Now I had a to-die-for body wrapped around me, a lead pipe pushing against my ass, and a vision of Max jerking off in my shower. He might get relief from that, but I certainly wouldn’t. “Or…” I pushed my ass back against him. “We could work it out.”
Max groaned. “Fuck, Georgia. Are you sure?”
I wasn’t. But lying here feeling frustrated didn’t make me feel very good either. So I responded by slipping down my pajama pants and underwear.
Max kissed the back of my neck and gently attempted to turn me on my back, but I wasn’t having it.
I shook my head. “From behind. Just like this.”
He stilled. “Why?”
I didn’t want to analyze the reason, or even talk for that matter; I just wanted what I wanted. And it annoyed me that he wasn’t taking off his clothes and getting on with it. This was all he wanted from our relationship, wasn’t it?
“Can we not talk? Can’t you just fuck me the way I want?”
Max didn’t move or say a word.
After thirty seconds or so, I thought he might tell me no. But then he took off his pants. He reached around and found my clit and started to rub small circles. But I didn’t want that either. I took his hand from between my legs and lifted it to hold my throat. “I’m on the pill, and I don’t want foreplay or a condom. I’m clean, and I trust you if you say you are. Okay?”
Again there was a long pause before his grip around my throat tightened. But then I felt his other hand reach between us and guide himself to my opening. “Open your legs,” he said sternly. “Put one on top of mine.”
I did, and before I had even settled back into place, Max was pushing inside me. My body wanted him, but it hadn’t fully prepared, so it burned a little as he drove in. But it was exactly what I wanted—to feel a little pain. Soft and sweet would’ve killed me right now.
Though Max was still being too gentle. He pushed in a few inches and pulled back out, trying to ease into me when all I wanted was the opposite. So the next time he started to push in, I used all of my might to push back on him as hard as I could, impaling myself to the root.
Max hissed. “Fuuuck.”
“Harder.”
He pulled out and pushed back in with a little more force.
“More.”
We grew wild. Each time he’d pull out, I’d demand more until we were slamming into each other. My chest was tight with emotion, and it felt like the only thing that could release it was an orgasm powerful enough to make my body quiver. The bed shook, I thrashed around, and our bodies grew slick with sweat.
“More.”
“Fuck, Georgia. I’m going to come.”
“Don’t you dare! Not yet.”
He growled and pulled out. I thought he was going to stop, but then suddenly, he flipped me over onto my stomach. Max slid a hand under my belly and hoisted my ass in the air. When I raised onto my elbows and attempted to get up on all fours, he splayed his fingers wide and pressed me back down. “No. You don’t want me to look at you, so ass in the air and face in the pillow.”
Max got up on his knees, gripped my hips, and pounded into me from behind. When he slid a hand around to my clit, it was like a bomb detonated inside of me. My body clenched around him, and I let out a loud moan even though the pillow stifled it.
Max pumped twice more, letting out a ferocious roar as he buried himself inside me and unloaded.
After, he rolled onto his back and laid next to me, panting. I kept my face buried in the pillow so he couldn’t see the tears that came when the dam broke.
CHAPTER 25
* * *
Max
“Do you actually work here? Or just come to get away from your wife?”
Otto shook his head and scribbled something into a small notepad. “Checking the seats, Pretty Boy. Every single one of these gets tested twice a year.”
“Sure, that’s what you’re doing.”