“That’s sad,” Jax says. “Why do parents fuck us up so bad?”
“They say the worst preparation for life is a happy childhood.” Connor says it bitterly, but I understand why that might be true. When things are too easy, we don’t build the fortitude to resist difficult times.
I think over what we just went through with Luna. As soon as the going got tough, we did what we thought was best and left her to live the life we assume she wants. We made the decision without even consulting her. We acted like my parents, overriding another person because we thought it was the right thing to do, but is it?
What if Luna really wanted us to fight for her? What if she’s sick of a life that’s taking so much from her and would have been happy to settle down into a relationship with us?
Maybe we’ve just left behind the best thing that’s ever happened to us and made the girl we love think we never cared about her. Maybe we’ve broken her heart.
Mo leans over and rests his hand against the top of my arm. “I know what you’re thinking,” he says, “But it’s too late.”
“Too late,” I murmur as the rest of my friends all shake their heads.
I guess we’ll never know what she really wanted, and maybe that’s a good thing.
As Isiah and Josiah talk more about their travel plans, I try to stay engaged, but all the while, my heart is telling me that I’m a fool. A fool who let the girl of my dreams slip through my fingers without ever asking her what she wanted.
A fool who repeats the mistakes of his parents.
28
MO
Everyone starts the next morning with a full English breakfast, which turns out to be a huge plate of eggs, sausage, bacon, black pudding – which is actually blood sausage – fried tomatoes, fried mushrooms, fried bread and some beans in tomato sauce. I opt for oatmeal which is definitely a healthier option.
The group is trying their best to keep spirits high. Jax is reeling off joke after joke, and Isiah and Josiah are getting involved, oblivious to the involvement of their brother in the Luna Evans scandal that is still blowing up across the newspapers of the world. I guess it’s good that they’re not interest in celebrity gossip otherwise I think Elijah might blow their minds. They might have stepped away from their traditional upbringing, but not that far.
I’m so far out of the realms of my past that sometimes I don’t even recognize myself.
Is it a good thing? I’m not sure.
I miss my family, but there’s no way I can go back safely. That’s what happens when you work for a foreign force. You end up blacklisted by your own people. I don’t regret becoming a translator for the Americans. I do regret that it’s caused me to separate from my old life.
I’m also thankful that I gained a new family who are as loyal and goodhearted as my real family.
There’s no point in looking back when the journey is in the opposite direction.
It’s funny that I don’t feel that way about Luna, though. With her, I want to gaze into my memories and hold them close.
When a call comes through to my phone from an Australian number, I know it’s going to be the police. I’m still listed as a contact, and I guess the record company hasn’t thought to replace our details with the new teams. I’m eager to answer to see what they’ve found out about the stalker, and when they relay that they’ve connected all the incidents to one person, I can’t wait to tell the rest of my boys. We finally have a lead.
“We have to tell Angelica,” I say.
Connor flairs his nostrils, expelling a noisy huff. “Are they sure Angelica isn’t the one responsible? She had access to the dressing room and the rider table.”
“Angelica may be snarky and hardnosed, but I don’t see her as a stalker,” Hudson says.
“The messages sounded like they were from a man, not a woman,” Asher recalls.
“For Luna’s sake, we need to get back in touch to discuss this with Angelica. She’s the one running things. She’s the one with the power to make a difference.”
“She’s not going to be interested,” Jax snorts. “That woman doesn’t give a shit about Luna. She’s just there to push her out on stage so that Blueday can extract their money’s-worth.”
“Then those elderly meatheads they’ve hired to replace us need to step up,” I say.
“Well, maybe you should call Angelica and get Mr. Wrong’s number.” Jax screws up his napkin and tosses onto the table in frustration.
“I could mash that guy’s face into the ground with the heel of my boot,” Asher says, in a surprisingly vicious way that doesn’t suit him.
“They all look like they should have retired a few years ago,” Hudson grumbles, downing the last of his coffee and slamming the cup on the table. The sharp noise draws the attention of other customers but he’s oblivious. We’re all taking the separation from Luna badly.
“Let’s just hope they’re doing a decent job. I don’t think I could sleep at night if I was seriously doubting their capabilities.”
Connor nods at my comment, his eyes closing slowly. He’s going to that solitary place where he searches for solutions to problems. He’s always been bad at asking for help but good at working out what to do. The trouble is, when you face problems alone, you miss the chance to get other perspectives. “If we call Angelica, what will her incentive be for handing over that number? As far as she’s concerned, we’re off the security detail. She doesn’t need to have anything more to do with us.”
“All we can do is try,” I say. “Appeal to her better nature.”
Connor rubs his face and drops his hand into his lap with a thud. “I would recommend someone other than me handles this. Angelica doesn’t hold much affection for me, especially when I didn’t let her into Luna’s room the night that we left Australia. She will probably hold a grudge about that to her deathbed.”
“Mo’s always had a cordial relationship with her,” Asher points out.
Everyone turns to stare at me. “I try to have a cordial relationship with everyone.”
“Well, that’s it, then.” Hudson balls up his napkin and tosses it at me, narrowly missing my head and landing it on the floor behind me. “Luna’s safety now rests solely in Mo’s hands.”
“Way to put pressure on him.” Jax turns to me, and grins, reaching out to pat my hand. “You can do it, Mo. Just turn on that Middle Eastern charm. Angelica has a soft spot for your dark eyes and smooth tanned skin. You know there’s a whole romance genre featuring sheikh billionaires that she probably reads every night.”
“Can we make this sound less sexual?” I say. “I’m phoning the woman to ask for a telephone number, not calling to propose to her.”
“Sheikhs don’t propose,” Jax laughs. “They kidnap and seduce.”
“I think that might be taking things a little too far.” Grabbing my phone from the table, I rise and walk to the front of the restaurant to secure a little privacy. “Angelica.”
“Mo, I don’t have time for this right now,” she barks. “Everything’s a disaster.”