“Don’t pay any attention to him,” his mom said. “He’s got some drama in him. Always did, to be honest. We host a ski race for charity every year, and for years we competed as a family in the race, encouraging other families to compete with us. The year he turned ten, he announced he was refusing to be on our team.”
“Because you were going to race in your pj’s,” Levi said.
“And?”
“And Dad sleeps in the buff.”
“He was going to race in nude-colored long underwear.”
“Yeah,” his dad said, “I’m not stupid. If I’d fallen while buck ass naked, I’d get freezer burn on my—”
“Dad.” Tess reached over to Peyton and covered her ears.
“Mama!” Peyton was bouncing in her seat, pointing to the peach cobbler in the center of the table. “Look, your favorite—bitches. Are we going to eat bitches?”
“Peaches, baby.”
“We like bitches.”
Tess looked pained. “Peaches. And yes.”
“So does Jasper.”
At hearing his name, Jasper leapt up from where he’d been napping at Levi’s feet, smacking his head on the table in the process. Undeterred, he came out to blink hopefully at everyone, eyes bright, tongue lolling, tail wagging.
“Jasper would eat anything that wouldn’t eat him first.” Tess looked at Jane. “My mom’s secret to peach cobbler is to double the butter required. It’s like crack, so I’m torn between looking good in a bathing suit or eating half the cobbler single-handedly.”
“You shouldn’t have to choose,” Jane said. “Always eat the bitches.” She grinned at Levi, her eyes sparkling. Her entire being sparkled.
She was having fun, and it looked good on her.
Levi’s mom passed Jane’s breadbasket around for the second time, and just like that it was all gone.
“It’s wonderful,” his mom said. “It’s not easy to bake at altitude.” She smiled at Peyton, who was inhaling hers. “And I bet one day, your and Levi’s kids will love baking with you.”
“Can you die from an eye twitch?” Levi asked the room, pressing a finger to his eye. “You can, right?”
Levi’s mom rolled her eyes, but looked at Jane. “I don’t mean to put you on the spot with the baby talk.”
“What did you mean?” Levi asked.
Jane put her hand on his thigh, like she was trying to comfort him, which gave his heart a pinch. Had anyone ever tried to protect him? He couldn’t remember.
“I do see myself with kids,” Jane said. “Someday.”
Levi looked over at her in surprise.
She looked just as surprised at herself. “I mean . . . I’m pretty sure. I love other people’s kids.”
“You’d be an amazing mom,” Levi told her quietly. “A kid would be lucky to have you.”
She seemed unsure. “I don’t have a lot of experience with family. Good experience anyway.”
Jane’s grandpa looked across the table at her, eyes soft. “And yet you’re still one of the two most amazing, warm, caring women I’ve ever met. Your grandma being the other, of course.”
Levi’s mom smiled. “Whoever manages to win you over as the mother of their children should count their blessings.” She slid a look toward Levi.
He shook his head at her. He’d tell her to behave, but she wasn’t programmed to behave.
“I’m not sure what kind of a mother I’d be,” Jane said. “But I’d love to someday get a chance to be a part of a close-knit family like this one. Your son is the best man I’ve ever known. You all must be so proud of him.”
“We are very proud,” his mom said. “He’s so smart. He always knows how to get rid of the gophers in the grass.”
He had to laugh. What else could he do?
“I’ve missed this,” Lloyd said. “My wife and I, we had it all, for a long time. I’ve been blessed, but I miss the family meals.”
“How long were you married?” Levi’s mom asked.
“Since the ice age.” He smiled. “We kept things fresh by writing love notes. I saved them all. My favorite was one she’d left for me after a fight. It said: I considered smothering you with a pillow last night but didn’t.”
Everyone laughed, but no one harder than Levi’s dad.
Levi’s mom gave him a long, hard look.
He winked at her.
Then she smiled.
“Peyton, slow down on that bread or you’ll choke,” Tess said. “Remember last week when you tried to shove a whole piece in?”
“What happened?” Jane asked.
“I throwed up,” Peyton announced. “All over. My throwed-up ate Grandma’s new pillow.”
“Stomach acid is strong enough to dissolve stainless steel,” Levi said.
“Seriously?” Tess asked him. “Gross.”
“Levi, we don’t talk about stomach acid at the table,” his mom said.
Levi reached for his wineglass and drained it. He should have started with that.
Jane smiled at him.
Yep, she was having a great time.
“Mommy says she has to walk around the block for every piece of bread she eats,” Peyton said. “She said she could’ve walked to Hawaii by now.”
“I’m not walking my bread off,” his dad said. “I’m old. Old people don’t have to walk if they don’t want to.”
“Amen,” Lloyd said.
“I walk 10,000 steps a day,” Levi’s mom said proudly.
“When I’m working, I get well over 20,000,” Jane said. “Yesterday I got 24,000.”
“Wow.” Tess shook her head. “All I get from work is the occasional dick pic.”
Levi’s mom choked. “What?”
“Oh yes,” Tess said. “And it’s disgusting. I mean, a real man gets out there and disappoints women in person.”
“You know you could just turn off your AirDrop, right?” Levi asked.
Tess shrugged. “Sure, but it’s probably going to be a while until I see one in person, so . . .”
“What’s a dix pic?” Peyton wanted to know.
“Changing the subject now,” his mom said, looking horrified. She turned to Jane. “You work so hard. I can’t imagine all you go through on a daily basis. I always wanted to be a nurse, but I chickened out. I’d hoped one of my kids would be a nurse, but Tess loves working at the store, and Levi . . .” She looked at him like he was a puzzle she was missing a few pieces on. “He just wanted to play on the computer. How many steps did you get yesterday?”
Levi shook his head. “I don’t know, Mom.”
“You should look. I don’t think it’s healthy for you to sit at a computer all day.”
“I ran five miles this morning.”
“I’m just saying.”
“You’re just saying what?” he asked.
His dad pointed at him with his fork. “Don’t sass your mom. She just means you spend a lot of time making big, fancy presentations when you could be doing something else.”