Glancing up, I watch as he takes one bite after the other as if he’s been starving. When he catches me staring, he grins, “It’s really good.”
A smile spreads over my face, his compliment and seeing how much he enjoys the meal making my heart overflow with love for him.
O’Brien eats every last bite, then washes it down with the water. Once he’s done, his eyes settle on me. For a solid minute, we stare at each other, and I start to worry he’s remembered something, but then he says, “The guilt hit much harder than I thought.”
My tone is gentle and filled with understanding, “Is that why you got drunk?”
He nods, twirling the empty bottle between his fingers. Closing his eyes, I watch as he lets the guilt surface, and seeing just how hard leaving those girls behind hit him makes emotion well in my chest. I don’t even bother hiding the heartache I feel for him when I say, “You did the right thing.”
O’Brien clenches his jaw, raw guilt written all over his face, and it makes it impossible for me to keep my own feelings under control. Setting the laptop aside, I rush to his side and wrap my arms around him. Holding him with all my strength, my voice is hoarse as I remind him, “I’ve got you.”
Wrapping his arms around me, he buries his face against my hair. He heaves a sigh as if the comfort I’m giving him is actually enough to chase the guilt away.
“Everything will be okay,” I whisper, brushing my hand over the nape of his neck and down his broad back. “When this is all over, you’ll see you did the right thing.” When he doesn’t move or say anything, I keep going, “You have so much integrity, O’Brien. It’s one of the first things I respected about you. You’re strong. You can do this.”
He pulls back, his eyes searching mine for the truth in my words. Bringing a hand to his jaw, I give him an earnest look. “I believe in you.”
Need starts to burn in his eyes as he presses his jaw harder against my palm. “Say it again.” As my lips part, he adds, “This time using my first name.”
I lift my other hand to the side of his neck, and unable to keep the walls up, my whole heart’s in my voice. “You’re the strongest man I know. You can do this. I believe in you, Daniel.”
Emotion washes over his face as if I’ve just given him the greatest gift. “My lifeline.”
A trembling smile spreads over my face. “Always.”
I’m pulled back against his chest, and for the longest time, we just hold each other. “You’re my ride or die, Daniel. Whatever I can do to help, just let me know.”
“Thanks, Julie.”
My eyes drift shut from how amazing it sounds to hear my name fall over his lips for the first time.
When we finally pull apart, I ask, “Anything to report for yesterday and today?”
“Right.” He lets out an empty-sounding chuckle. “I didn’t report yesterday.” Taking a deep breath, he lets it out slowly. “With the next test, I’ll have to kill someone.”
Even though we knew this was coming, it’s still a shock to hear the words from him. Silently nodding, I get up and return to the laptop and phone.
Pressing dial on the number, I wait for Eric to answer, “Yes, JJ?”
“Put me through to the chief.”
“Going through.”
“JJ?” the chief’s voice sounds over the line.
“We need clearance.” I swallow hard. “The next test will be to kill someone.”
Chief Archer lets out a heavy sigh. “Put me on speaker.”
I press the button, then say, “You’re good to go, sir.”
“O’Brien?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you have any idea who the target will be?” Chief asks.
“Joseph just said it would be someone who deserves what’s coming.”
Does it make it any easier?
“We need you to get to the Bregus,” Chief mutters. “What’s the chances of the target being innocent?”
O’Brien tugs his bottom lip between his teeth.
Dear Lord, don’t do that when I’m trying to focus on work.
“If he’s mixed up with the syndicate and did something to piss them off, zero.”
“It’s not like they’ll just let you decline the invite and walk away,” I mutter.
“True,” Chief agrees with me. “You’re cleared.”
“Thanks, Chief,” I say, then end the call.
O’Brien’s eyes drift over my face. “If the second test is murder, what will the third test be?”
Shaking my head, I slump back against the couch. “Smuggling drugs or girls?”
He clenches his jaw, and resting his forearms on his thighs, he links his fingers. “What if it’s worse?”
“Like?”
When he brings his eyes to mine, I see fear in them for the first time since we started working together. “Kidnapping an innocent…”
God.
I instantly start to shake my head. “No.”
With an expression that’s carved out of granite, he bites out, “What if that’s the third test, JJ? What the fuck do I do then?”
Not even thinking, I say, “Then you kidnap me.”
He darts to his feet, losing his temper in a second flat. “What the fuck, Jefferson! No. Never.”
“If you don’t have a choice, I’m the logical target,” I argue.
He pins me with a non-negotiable look. “I said no.”
“Then we have to pull you out,” I say because there’s no way. No. Just no. “Nothing is worth sacrificing who you are.”
“And the Bregus continue to kill, drug, and rape their way through America,” he growls, a desperate look on his face as he tries to find an answer.
“We can try to track Zef Rama. He’s sure to lead us straight to the Bregu brothers.”
Again he shakes his head. “He’s too fucking good at his job. It’s impossible.” Finally, he looks at me. “It’s up to Rama what the third test will be. I’ll be so fucking close.”
Closing the distance between us, I grab hold of his arm, giving him a pleading look. “Then you take me. I’m trained, O’Brien. I’ll be able to cope better than an innocent girl.”
Halfway through my sentence, he’s already shaking his head. “I won’t risk you. That’s something I won’t survive.”
“And you’ll survive taking an innocent girl off the street?”
For the longest moment, he just stares at me. “I won’t risk you.”
Then I’ll pull you out if it comes to that. Even if you hate me for stopping the operation.
Because I won’t risk you either.
O’Brien
Following Joseph into his house, I hear children giggling before two girls come barreling toward us. Joseph crouches down to catch them, and I watch as he hugs his daughters.
A woman comes out of the kitchen, a welcoming smile on her face. “Finally, I get to meet you, Danny.”
Holding out my hand, I shake hers. “Thanks for having me over for dinner.”
“Any friend of Joseph is always welcome,” she says while giving her husband a kiss. “Wash up. Dinner’s almost ready.”