A sound akin to a wounded animal spilled from my parted lips when he bit down on my nipple at the same time he pulled his fingers almost all the way out and then thrust them back into me and curled them inward.
It hurt. It was agony. It was the greatest thing I’d ever felt.
He rubbed his thumb along my clit in slow circles and I reached out to grip his forearm, not to push him away, but to keep him in place. I dug my nails into his flesh and he hissed then groaned.
I couldn’t comprehend anything around me as the pleasure and pain and agony and ecstasy filled me and exploded outward.
And the entire time Nikolai sucked at my breast, the ache of his teeth pulling on that tight flesh, the uncomfortable fullness of his fingers lodged in my pussy, drawing out a hurtful pain that sucked the air from my lungs.
He said hushed words against my breasts, words I couldn’t hear, but knew I wouldn’t understand even if he’d said them loud enough.
And when the pleasure receded my body tingled, every single inch of exposed flesh feeling like I’d touched a live wire.
It was long seconds of riding this wave before I felt myself come back down. I felt him pull his fingers out. I was blinking rapidly, trying to stay conscious when all I wanted to do was float away.
“Look at me, printsessa.” There was clear command in his voice, a dominant demand that had my attention being pulled to him. He held his hand between us, his middle and index finger covered in my orgasm, streaked in my blood.
My mouth slightly parted as I watched him move those digits to his mouth, drag his tongue over them, licking every drop of me off, never once taking his gaze from my eyes. And only when he was done getting his fill did he reach out and grip my chin with that same hand, his fingers wet, a combination of me and him, warm but now cooling against my jaw.
He jerked me forward and our lips slammed together viciously, violently. He plunged his tongue into my mouth and forced me to taste myself, forced me to taste him. He was showing me, making me feel and see and hear and experience that I was now his. And he said all of that with that one kiss.
A new life bloomed in me, light and heat and electricity and so much intensity that I couldn’t see anything right in front of me, didn’t know where I was. Up or down. Kept on earth or lost so high I’d never touch the ground again.
He broke the kiss and instantly I was boneless, exhausted, so satiated I let myself sink against his hard body, not caring that I clung to him, that I had my arms wrapped around his neck, my head resting on his shoulder. In that moment I trusted him wholly, completely.
He rose from the chair, the towel falling fully away from me. Nikolai lifted me easily into his arms as if I were that little doll he kept calling me. The whisper of air touched my temple, the slightest brush. I probably imagined it, but I wanted to think it was a soft side of Nikolai kissing me, telling me in his own, silent way that he had me, that everything was okay. Even if I knew it wasn’t.
The sound of blankets ruffling, the feeling of softness greeting my boneless body.
“What about tonight? What about our wedding night…” I murmured sleepily, unable to finish the sentence as I started feeling heavier and heavier, my body sinking deeper and deeper into the mattress.
But Nikolai didn’t say anything in response, didn’t comment that he hadn’t taken me, hadn’t gotten his own pleasure.
Blankets covered my naked body. My eyes were already closed, sleep pulling me under.
But what I was aware of was that I drifted off to sleep alone in that massive bed with my virginity still intact on my wedding night.
Chapter
Sixteen
Amara
I didn’t know where we were going, and for some reason I was too afraid to ask Nikolai, who sat silently beside me in the back of the Mercedes that had picked us up from the hotel just minutes before.
I glanced over at my husband. His focus was his cell phone as he typed out a message, his body so big that he seemed to take up the entire backseat. Or maybe it was just the vision of him that was firmly implanted in my mind. A beast, larger than life.
He was all-powerful, dangerous, someone who’d kill for me as easy as it was to take a breath in and exhale it out.
And he took my breath away.
“My little doll stares an awful lot,” he said without looking up at me.
I shivered at the way he said “little doll”, at the tone and inflection of his voice. It covered me like a hot balm, like heated honey.
“There’s a lot of you.” I felt my eyes widen as those words spilled from me before I could stop them. Oh God, the humiliation. My face heated unbearably but I couldn’t look away even though I desperately wanted to. I saw the corner of his mouth twitch as if he found it amusing.
He tucked his cell back in the inner pocket of his jacket and rested fully against the leather seat, turning his head to look at me. Nikolai still had that hooded cast to his eyes, his black lashes too thick and his eyes too blue to be on a man as masculine as him.
A man should not be that attractive, shouldn’t look that good when he wasn’t even trying. He instantly made my body warm and soft and so very wet.
And all it took was a pointed look at me.
His gaze held mine for long moments and then I saw him start to lean forward. He was coming closer, crowding me in the best possible way. When his gaze dipped down to my mouth my breath caught and my lips parted on their own. He was going to kiss me. I wanted him to kiss me. Right here in the back of this Mercedes. Right here where the driver could see it all.
And I wouldn’t stop him.
But before he could give me what I wanted the car was slowing, his smile was growing, and he was leaning further away from me.
I blinked back rapidly and watched as he smoothed his hands down his leather jacket. He didn’t wear the normal attire I’d seen the men in my life wear, the men who worked for my father. My father.
They all wore tailor made suits, expensive cuts of cloth that hid the monster beneath the material. But not Nikolai. Aside from the tuxedo on our wedding day, I’d only seen Nikolai in dark jeans, an equally dark shirt, and that black leather jacket molded over his hard, very male body.
The car coming to a stop jarred me out of my clear sexual appraisal of Nikolai and I looked out the passenger side window, feeling confusion fill me as I stared at what was right outside. My mother and father’s home.
“You took me to my parents’ house?” My heart was thundering as the reality of that settled in, as the fear of the why filled me until it spilled over. Was he bringing me back here because he didn’t want me? Oh God, had I done something wrong?
“Nikolai?” His name was a soft croak from me. I looked at him and heard the panic in my voice, knew it covered my face. All I could think about was what did I do wrong? What did I do wrong? Oh God… what did I do wrong?
At first his expression was stoic but then the dark slashes of his eyebrows came down slightly in a frown.
“I did something wrong? You’re giving me back to my father?” I hated–hated–that I sounded so weak right now, but God it was terrifying to think of what my father would do if Nikolai told him he didn’t want the marriage to last. That he didn’t want me.
I didn’t realize my hands were shaking until Nikolai placed his much larger, heavier one on top of mine. Instantly I calmed, stilled, but I could still hear the racing of my heart in my ears, feel it almost bursting from my chest.