That was when I spotted the silhouette of a man walking out from under the tracks with a woman in his arms.
“Jameson…”
I unlocked the doors and shoved mine open as Jameson strode through the snow toward me. It was an image I would never forget. As he got closer, I quickly pulled open the back door for him.
His sister was tiny, and limp like a rag. She had a horrible gash on her face, and one of her eyes was swollen shut. My eyes welled as Jameson lowered her to the back seat, and I did my very best to blink away my tears before he turned to look at me.
“Thanks.” Jameson shut the door and walked around to the passenger side. “If you could take us back to Jon’s, I need to take a closer look at her.”
“Of course. Whatever you need.” When he said nothing else, just continued to look off into the darkness, I asked, “Jameson, are you okay?”
He glanced over the roof of the car at me, and the bleak expression in his eyes made my heart stop.
“No.” That was all he said before he opened his door and slid inside.
I sucked in a shaky breath and reminded myself that this was Jameson’s way. He’d never been much of a talker, but when things got difficult, he was the king of shutting down. I just had to look at how he’d dealt with losing Simon to know that.
He’d left behind a fire station that was like family, shut everyone out after losing his best friend and crew mate, and turned off his emotions rather than deal with them. He’d said as much tonight.
So I needed to take a step back here and let him go at his own pace. He would talk to me when he was ready.
I checked on Amy, who was curled up against the back seat with her eyes shut, and after Jameson buckled in and began texting someone—Jon, I assumed—I started the engine.
We drove back to the bar in silence, which was probably for the best with the way the snow was falling. I’d lived in Chicago my entire life, but that didn’t mean I liked driving around in this stuff.
I pulled into the spot I had earlier, and Jon pushed open the side door and came running over. Jameson was out of the car and opening the back door just as Jon reached him.
“Fucking hell.” Jon turned to Jameson, who was standing by the door, his knuckles white as he gripped the doorframe. “Who did this to her?”
“I don’t know. She wouldn’t tell me, and now she keeps going in and out…”
Jon looked back to Amy, then reached in and gently pushed some of the hair back from her face.
“This is nasty, Jameson. The motherfucker who did this—”
“I know.”
“Maybe we should take her to the hospital.”
“I promised I wouldn’t.”
Jon straightened. “You’ve promised that before.”
“Yeah, well, tonight I meant it. I already feel like a piece of shit that my sister is…” He swallowed. “I promised. So let’s get her inside and clean her up. If it looks worse—God knows how that’s possible—I’ll do whatever I have to.”
“Okay.” Jon put a hand on his shoulder. “Okay. Let me get her.”
Jon reached into the back of the car and scooped Amy up in his arms, and I ran over to pull open the side door for him. Jameson followed him inside, but as I stepped in behind him, he stopped and turned on me. The move so sudden I nearly stumbled into him.
“I—” Jameson glanced over my shoulder. “I think this is where you should probably go home now. Where we should put an end to this.”
“This?” I blinked at the man I’d come to admire as much as I desired.
“Us. I was kidding myself to think that I could be who you need. Who you could want in your life.” He held his hands out and looked around the narrow hall. “I mean, this is it, GQ. This is my life.”
He started to laugh, and it sounded almost manic.
“Cheap bars, runaway sister, emotionally fucked-up beyond anything you can imagine. I’m not the hero you always dreamed of. I’m nobody’s hero. I couldn’t save Simon, and I can’t even save my own sister.”
He ran a hand though his hair and then turned away from me. “It’s just better if you go. A clean break. I’ll come by and pack my stuff up later.”
My heart sank as I stared at Jameson’s back, the ground between us splintering and fractioning, as my eyes began to sting.
He was hurting. This was a gut reaction. That’s what this was about.
Tonight had been one thing after another, a rollercoaster of emotions that had flown right off the fucking tracks.
But this couldn’t be where it ended, not when we’d just begun.
“If you want me to leave, then I’ll leave. But before I go, you need to understand something.” I waited until Jameson faced me, and put a hand over his heart. “I don’t need you to save me. I never have. I want you, not some ridiculous fantasy.”
Jameson stood stoic and silent as I leaned in to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, and I wasn’t surprised at all when he didn’t reach for me.
As much as it pained me, somewhere in the back of my mind, I think I’d expected this. Things had been going too well. We’d moved from friends to lovers to a place where Jameson started to open up to me, and while I’d reveled in the idea of falling in love, he had panicked, and this was the final outcome.
“I hope Amy’s okay, and that you can get her the help that she needs.” I slipped my hands into my pockets, so I wouldn’t reach for him again. “You think you can’t save her, but what do you think you did tonight?”
When it was clear that this was it, that the conversation was over, I nodded and headed for the door. But just before I pushed through it, I stopped and looked back at Jameson, wanting one final image to remember him by, before I locked him away in my heart forever.
I pushed open the exit door and stepped out into the chilly night air. Then I crossed my arms over myself, and finally let the tears fall free.
What had just happened in there? How could this be it?
I couldn’t believe how this night had gone or how it had just ended.
I unlocked my car and opened the door, and just as I was about to crawl inside, I heard—
“Hey, GQ?”
My heart stopped as I glanced over my shoulder to see Jameson standing on the sidewalk. He was wearing a leather jacket now and had his hands in his pockets, and with the white snowflakes in his dark hair, he was the most beautiful man I’d ever seen.
I held my breath as I walked back toward him, and when he met me halfway, my fool heart felt as though it were about burst.
Jameson reached out, took my hands, and pulled me in close. His eyes searched mine, full of questions, and full of…hope. “You don’t need me to save you, huh?”
A tear slipped free as I wound my arms around his neck.
“No…” Then I took the biggest chance of my life and handed my heart over to him. “I think I’m here to save you.”
Thank You
Thank you for reading WICKED HEAT.
I hope you enjoyed the beginning of Ryan & Jameson’s love story. I can’t wait for you to see how GQ finally wins over his Grump in WICKED FLAME!