“I wasn’t, but it’s not a big deal.”
“It is to me.” There was a pain in his eyes that reached past my inebriation to pull at my heart. “What you said earlier about men doing ugly things when they think they can . . .”
He inhaled audibly and looked straight forward as he said, “My mother. Twenty-six years later and she’s still healing from his abuse.” There was a fire in his eyes when his gaze met mine again. “I have no tolerance for men who mistreat women.”
Neither of us said anything for a long moment. His words hung in the air between us. “I’m sorry.”
“Not your fault.” His expression tightened. “She’s fine now, but don’t make the same mistakes she did. Don’t trust someone so much that you make yourself vulnerable to them. And if someone raises a hand to you, you fight—fight them so hard they don’t dare ever try it again.” He looked away. “I try to understand why my mother didn’t, but I don’t. She believes she deserved what he did to her. She didn’t. No one does.”
In a move meant to comfort him, I placed a hand on his thigh.
There was sheer torment in his eyes when he growled, “Don’t.”
I removed my hand. “Sorry, I was just—”
He leaned closer. “And don’t apologize. Don’t give me that power.”
I swallowed hard. “I don’t understand.”
“I’m no hero.” His breath was hot on my cheek and his mouth hovered over mine. “You’re beautiful and I’m tempted, but that doesn’t mean anything will happen between us. It does mean, though, that you should keep your hands to yourself.”
My breath caught in my throat, and I’d never been more turned on. Right or wrong, there was no denying the heat washing through me in waves. Every inch of me was painfully aware of every inch of him. “Because you’re tempted?” The words flew out before I had time to ask myself if they should.
He gave me a long look. “You’ve had too much to drink and you’re hurting. It’s natural to not want to be alone. Some guys would take advantage of that. I won’t.”
His assessment of how I felt was spot-on and left me feeling exposed. “No, because you’re so much better than other guys. Mr. Perfect is that what you want me to believe?”
His laugh was more of a bark. “Far from it.” Then his expression turned more serious again. “I’m human, just like you. I’ve done some shit I regret, spent time asking myself if I was doing anything right . . . but I get up each morning and try to do better. That’s all I’m doing, just trying to do a little better each day.”
Swoon. “You have a beautiful soul, Kal Ragsdale.”
He tapped a finger on the tip of my nose and said, “And your judgement is impaired, but I’ll take the compliment anyway.”
It was definitely the alcohol . . . I have no other justification for why I said, “I am hurting and you’re right, I don’t want to be alone tonight.”
“All I’m doing is dropping you at the door of your hotel.”
I shook my head and yawned. “I know.” His shoulder looked so tempting. What would he do if I rested my head there . . . just for a minute? I scooted closer, laid my head on his shoulder, and the last thing I heard before I passed out was him swearing.
I woke a short time later to Kal urging me to get out of the car so he could walk me to my room. I climbed out and swayed. He steadied me with an arm around my waist and led me into the hotel lobby.
“I’ll walk you to your room door,” he said in a gruff tone.
I pulled slightly away from him. “You don’t have to. I’m fine.” Then I tripped and would have faceplanted on the floor of the lobby if he hadn’t caught me and hauled me back to his side.
“I’d do it for anyone. What floor are you on?”
I told him as we made our way to the elevator. “I have my own room because his sister and her friends don’t really like me, and Robert said we should stay at different hotels.” I came to an abrupt halt as that suddenly made sense. “So I wouldn’t notice that he and Daphne were fucking.”
He brought a finger to my lips briefly. “Shhh. Not everyone in the hotel needs to know that.”
I looked around, noticed people watching us, and felt belligerent rather than embarrassed. “His name is Robert Bouchard,” I told the crowd. “Only date him if you want to find out he’s screwing someone else two weeks before you marry him.”
Kal dipped his head down to mine. “Feel better now?”
I didn’t so I threw an arm up in the air and loudly proclaimed, “He’s not even that good in bed. I was willing to settle for that.”
“Never settle,” a woman from across the lobby called out. “Not even if he looks as good as your guy does.”
“What a shame,” someone else called out, “to be that hot and not good in bed.”
Kal straightened at my side and announced, “I’m not Robert Bouchard.”
“Thank God,” the first woman said and there was a general round of laughter.
I gave Kal’s wide chest a pat. “This is Kal.” I looked up at him and smiled. “He’s a good guy. He rescued me tonight.”
A beautiful woman in a short, tight dress walked by and said, “You can rescue me anytime, Kal. In fact, if your little friend passes out, you can rescue me tonight. I’ll wait for you down in the bar.”
I made a growl deep in my chest and tried to tell her he was mine, but my words jumbled into gibberish.
“I appreciate the offer,” Kal said smoothly, “but I’ve got all I can handle right here.” With that he turned me toward the elevator again and ushered me there.
We weren’t alone in the elevator, but that didn’t stop me from saying, “I’m sorry. I know you’re not mine.”
He looked down at me and gave me a little squeeze. “You probably won’t remember any of this tomorrow, so don’t sweat it.”
I tapped my temple. “I won’t forget it. I have a really good memory. Some say porno—no, photographic. Photographic memory. That’s how I did so well in school. I can remember everything I read.” My slipup tickled my imagination. “What would a pornographic memory even be? Would I only remember naughty videos?” I giggled at the thought of what kind of degree a person would get with that skill. That was followed by another thought I couldn’t contain. “I must have that skill because I won’t forget a moment of you on stage. When you hovered just above the floor . . . I felt like you were dancing for me. Every woman did. That’s a gift.”
Kal groaned. The elevator opened at my floor, and he led me out of it, down the hall, and to the door of my room. “Do you have your key?”
“I do,” I said without looking for it. He had the most incredible jaw. So strong. So smooth. I wanted to touch it. I raised my hand to, but he caught it in his and brought my hand back to my side.
“Find your key or give me your purse and I will.”
“Right. My key.” I dug it out.
He opened the door to my room with it then handed it back to me. I took a step inside the room then turned and replaced my key in my purse. That was when I noticed my phone and part of our earlier conversation came back to me. “Do you really think Robert would hurt me?”