Remi
“You don’t have to come inside,” I told Bowen, his hand wrapped around mine as we pulled into a parking spot. The shopping center was packed, but since it was home to four amazing restaurants, two trendy bars, a boutique, and a kick-ass coffee shop, that wasn’t unusual. “You could just go next door and have a drink and I’ll meet you when I’m done.”
He put the truck in park and flashed me a white smile that warmed me in all the right places. “I wouldn’t have volunteered to come with you if I wanted to sit at a bar alone.”
“I know, but these survivors’ mixers aren’t exactly a riveting experience. On a good day, two or three people show up and Katherine tries to make small talk while we all stare at each other, pretending it isn’t awkward as hell.”
“Babe, it’s fine.” He kissed the back of my hand before releasing it. “Let’s go be awkward. I know you’ve been wanting to see Katherine and Tim again anyway.”
I had, but only so I could bitch at Tim for not calling me to help. Though, with seven figures in my bank account and more than likely a similar amount in Katherine’s, I was hoping they had all the help they needed now.
I grinned. “You’re a good Sirfriend, Mr. Michaels.”
“I can’t be that good. I haven’t made you Mrs. Michaels yet.”
My breath caught and my eyes flared.
Oh.
My.
God.
Had he really just said that? Mrs. Michaels?
I mean, things with us had been moving fast, but we hadn’t even been together for two months yet. Was he seriously thinking about marriage already?
It was way way way way waaaaaaay too soon for that.
Right?
We did love each other though. And I spent practically every night at his house, sans Wednesdays when I hung out with the guys. And he had replaced my shampoo and conditioner in his shower when they’d recently run out all on his own. My toothbrush was on his counter. My clothes hung in his closet. I even had a drawer where he put my panties and bras after he did the laundry.
Oh holy fuck, were we already married?
My back shot straight and I could feel the blood drain from my face. “Is…um, that something you’ve been thinking about recently?”
He smirked. “Before this moment? Every fucking day. After seeing that horrified expression on your face? Nope.”
My shoulders fell. Damn. I really needed to work on not being so transparent. “I don’t look that horrified.”
He turned in his seat to fully face me. “Remi, I’ve seen people being arrested for tax evasion look less scared.”
“I’m just…surprised. That’s all. Isn’t it kinda soon to be talking about…you know.”
“Marriage.” He chuckled. “You can say the word. A ring won’t magically appear on your finger or anything.”
I rolled my eyes. “I know that.” However, at the mention of it, my gaze flicked down to my hand.
Bowen let out a deep belly laugh. “Relax. I’m not proposing. There’s been no ring shopping. No asking permission from your father. Nothing. But…yeah, I’ve thought about it. You in a white dress. Us buying a house together. Seeing you waddling through the living room with our baby growing inside you. Boys with your sense of humor. Girls with your fiery attitude. None of them with your natural grace.” He winked. “Holidays in the mountains. Vacations at the beach. A whole fucking forever together.” He reached across the center console and wrapped his hand around the side of my neck, his thumb tracing the curve of my jaw. “And that was just the stuff I thought about while my nose was bleeding on the courthouse steps.”
I gasped, a chill exploding across my skin. “You what?”
He grinned, hauling me toward him until our mouths were no more than a breath apart. “Fate, Remi. I put up a good fight because, at the time, I was scared of it too. But I knew it then, and I sure as fuck know it now.” He kissed me, chaste and sweet. “But don’t you worry. I’m gonna do my best to be a patient man so the next time we talk about this you won’t look like you’ve just scheduled a root canal.”
My mind raced with a million thoughts as love swelled inside my chest. When I was younger, I’d had plenty of daydreams of finding and falling for Mr. Right. Planning a massive wedding with an obnoxious number of red tulips and all my friends and family in attendance. I’d dreamed of two kids—a boy and a girl. A big house with a tire swing out front. I wanted—no, I believed—the Happily Ever After that fairy tales had sold me.
Then my mom cheated on my dad. I witnessed the pain on his face day in and day out. The anger and betrayal in his eyes where nothing but love had lived before. The heartbreaking sadness she burdened him with when she chose a man she barely knew over my father who had loved her tirelessly for almost half his life.
She’d had that wedding.
She’d had that life.
She’d had that love.
But in the end, none of it had meant anything to her.
No. I didn’t believe in fate because I refused to believe that my mom had abandoned our family because she was destined to be with my high school Spanish teacher.
Aaron had told me for years I was jaded when it came to love because of what my mom had done to my dad. But it wasn’t until that very minute, while sitting in Bowen’s truck as the most incredible man I had ever met told me he’d been contemplating forever with me before I’d even known that a tomorrow together was a possibility, that I realized it was never love that I’d been afraid of.
I was absolutely terrified of loving someone so deeply and so profoundly and then having them abandon me too.
My mom hadn’t just left and crushed my dad’s heart; she’d broken mine too.
But I wasn’t a robot. Of course I’d thought about the future. I wasn’t ready to vow to forever, but he’d painted such an inviting picture. I certainly liked the way it looked through his eyes. Mainly because in his version of the future, we got to spend it together.
He frowned, the space between his eyes wrinkling, making little parentheses. “Remi, seriously. Don’t stress about it. I’m completely happy with how things are right now. Yes, one day, I would like more, but I’ll wait an eternity if that’s what it takes for you to be ready. And if you never get there, I’ll wait for the eternity after that. I love you. That’s all that matters, okay?”
My stomach did a somersault. God, just when I’d thought he couldn’t get any more incredible, he went and said stuff like that—reading my insecurities like a book.
I brushed my nose with his. “I won’t make you wait an eternity, but I need some more time, okay?” I pressed my lips to his, inhaling reverently.
He tried to take it deeper, his mouth opening and his tongue gliding against mine. But if we got started now, we’d never make it inside to Katherine’s mixer.
Righting myself in my seat, I gave him a teasing side-eye. “Though we can discuss things that may or may not happen if we ever were to get married. Like, say, that whole boys and girls thing?”
He didn’t even try to hide his smile. “What about it?”
“Boys and girls are both plural. In order to have that, you would need at least four kids.”