Well, that wasn’t completely true.
The one thing she couldn’t do was immerse herself into the whirlwind of Raz’s championship fight—not because she wanted him to lose or even win, but because he’d decided to walk the path alone.
His choice.
She wasn’t surprised when Briggs messaged her, letting her know she didn’t need to attend the weigh-in. He’d added that her brothers’ tuition had been paid in full and that he was waiting for word from Raz on how their arrangement would proceed.
Arrangement.
She could read between the lines and decipher the sports agent’s polite way of conveying that it was over between herself and Raz.
It wasn’t what she wanted. But like yin and yang, love and loss balanced each other. She would love again. She just needed to get through this day. Tomorrow would come, and whether Raz won or lost, she would go on with an open heart—and a lot of work to do.
Cleo and Laney had a million ideas, and she was ready to dive in. But she had one stipulation. They’d begin the work after Raz’s fight.
Upon reading Briggs’ message, she’d decided to give herself a twenty-four-hour respite.
It wasn’t a sign of weakness to unplug. It was strength—the strength of giving herself time to meditate and reflect. She’d turned off her phone. She didn’t need to hear about the media storm covering the fight. It would come, and it would go, and the universe would decide what happened next.
Did she miss Raz with every fiber of her being?
Yes, and Sebastian, too.
But a serene peacefulness came with knowing she could overcome any loss. She could risk her heart understanding that, while it could ache, it wouldn’t break. And she wasn’t about to allow fear to hold her back.
With or without Erasmus Cress by her side, she believed in love.
And this new embrace of love started with talking to her father, not as the man who’d let her down, but as the man who’d never made it out of the darkness of grief, longing, and loss.
“You didn’t think I’d show, did you, sweetie?”
She looked over her shoulder as Connolly Lamb headed her way. Bright-eyed with a spring to his step, the man carried a satchel and looked better than he had in years. The dark circles under his eyes and the gray tinge to his skin from spending his nights drinking and betting on sports gave way to a healthy glow.
“I’m glad you made it, Dad. It’s good to see you.”
He stood next to her and leaned against the fence. “This was always your favorite part of the petting zoo when you were little.”
She cocked her head to the side. “I thought I liked the goats.”
“That was Alec and Anders,” he replied with a sentimental bend to his words. “You and your mother liked it here, with the ponies and donkeys. Or maybe you two needed a break from the Lamb boys.”
She chuckled. “You’re probably right. They could be a handful.”
“But you never were, Libby. You were always so strong, so centered. I owe you an apology. I owe you many, many apologies.”
While the man had spewed a litany of empty promises and hollow apologies in the past, his words rang true today.
How did she know?
She felt it.
“Thank you, Dad. It means everything to hear you say that.”
He had a lovely white aura, a light and healing color. The heaviness that had weighed him down in a murky hue had let up. He was a different man. What she couldn’t figure out was what had spurred the transformation. She swallowed past the lump in her throat, needing to get the words out. “I know how much you loved Mom. Her death was hard on you, and I understand now that you didn’t have anyone to catch you when you fell.”
Tears welled in his eyes. “Can I give you a hug?”
She nodded and allowed her father to fold her into his embrace.
There’s magic in stripping off the armor and extending grace—a lovely symmetry that settles in the soul.
He pulled back and patted her cheek. “I wanted to do right by you and the boys, but I got lost somewhere along the way. One day of wrong turns became one year and then a decade. I’m doing better, but I’m not going to make you any promises other than to tell you that I’m making better choices, and through my actions, I’ll prove to you and to the boys that I can be the father you deserve.”
“That means the world to me,” she answered, blinking back tears.
The man exhaled a slow breath, gathering himself. “I thought about reaching out to you before I left, but I wasn’t sure if I should.”
What did that mean?
“Where are you going?”
He cocked his head to the side. “You don’t know? I figured he’d tell you with me leaving today.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Dad.”
“Erasmus’s sports agency offered me a job.”
Was that what Raz was doing when he told her father someone would be calling?
“What kind of job?” she pressed.
“They’re opening a location in Kansas City, and they need a facilities manager. I had to agree to stop drinking and attend Gamblers Anonymous. That’s what I’ve been doing these past weeks. I was in a bad place when I showed up in Rickety Rock. I’m not proud of what I did. Erasmus told me that someone would contact me. A man named Briggs Keaton called the next day and offered me a deal. It’s good pay, real good pay, and it would be a fresh start in a new city, but not so far from you.”
“And you leave today?” she asked, totally and completely floored.
“In twenty minutes,” he confirmed. “A taxi is picking me up from here.”
Twenty minutes.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were moving?” she sputtered as they started toward the entrance.
“I didn’t want to burden you or your brothers, and Erasmus made it clear that I wasn’t to contact you.”
“What did he say to you?” she pressed. She wanted to be furious with him for keeping something like this from her. Still, she couldn’t help but see her father’s transformation.
“He didn’t want me to upset you. But I figured you reaching out to me meant that you wanted to see me. Erasmus cares deeply for you, honey. I think he’d do anything for you.”
How she wished that was true.
She shook her head, absolutely gobsmacked. “I still can’t believe he didn’t mention this to me. I don’t even know what to say.”
“You can say what I said,” he replied, a grin pulling at the corners of his mouth.
“And what’s that?” she asked, concentrating on the path as they strolled by the black and white goats.
“Thank you,” the man replied humbly. “Erasmus is giving me a chance to start over and get back to being the kind of man your mother married. A man who works hard and loves his kids. Denver holds too many ghosts and too many old haunts that could lead me back to betting on sports and drinking away the winnings. I need a clean start. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that Erasmus Cress is saving my life. Do you think you’ll be talking to him anytime soon?”
A knot formed in her belly as they passed through the gate. “I’m not sure if I’m going to see him again. We had a falling out.”