“I like spoiling you, and you do it enough for me.” He is so incredibly good to me—bringing me flowers every Sunday when he comes over for dinner, invoking huge amounts of patience trying to teach me self-defense, texting me every morning and every night to let me know he’s thinking of me, helping me with my philosophy homework, running me a bath when I arrive on Saturdays worn out after a busy week—and he’s even returned to the retirement center with me a few times and helped out. We spend as much time together as we can out in the open, without having to sneak around, because he knows how hard that is for me. He sees the guilt I’m carrying and how I hate lying to West and Stella about where I stay over every week.
But it’s more than that. Vander makes me laugh. He listens to me and seeks out my advice. He shares my beliefs and encourages my passions. He worships me and makes me feel desirable. He’s teaching me how to ask for and give pleasure in the bedroom, and he’s the reason I have a permanent smile on my face and a constant spring in my step. He’s giving me my confidence back, and I can’t put a price on that.
“You never told me about your research,” he says in between mouthfuls of dinner.
“I looked up Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox after our conversation with Boner last night, and he was right. They seem to have a very spiritual relationship, and they fully believe they are soul mates.” I take a sip of my wine in between mouthfuls of the sumptuous steak and the melt-in-the-mouth potatoes. “Like us, they felt the connection straightaway. She said they are twin flames. I like that, and I Iove them. They are so hot for one another, so in love, and the things they post about each other online are just beautiful.” It’s possibly a little cheesy, to some people, but they can get away with it. They are bringing the entertainment and the glamour back to rock and roll, and I think the world needs that right now.
“He carries a necklace with her blood in it,” Vander says with a little glint in his eye. “To celebrate their recent engagement, they drank each other’s blood.” I blink at him as his lips curve up at the corners. “When we get engaged, we should totally do that too.”
My mouth drops to the table, and he chuckles. “Is that too vampire-y for you?” He wolfs down more of his dinner.
“I don’t think vampire-y is a word, although I could be mistaken, but it wasn’t that part that had my jaw dropping, even if I draw the line at wearing or drinking blood.” I gulp another mouthful of wine.
“Ah, I see.” He leans back in his chair, all casual, smiling confidently across the table at me while popping another piece of steak in his mouth. He maintains eye contact as he chews, enjoying seeing me all flustered. The punk. “It’s the engagement part.”
I nod and guzzle more wine. He sits up straighter, losing the cocky grin, replacing it with a serious look as he slides his hand across the table and threads our fingers together. “I don’t want to freak you out, but I’m not going to lie to you either. I want to marry you some day, Kendall. That’s a promise. I already consider you my wife, in here.” He thumps his fist over his heart. “In the only way that counts.”
I get up and walk around to him, kneeling at his feet. My pulse is pounding, and my heart races as I take his hands and peer up at him. There will never be a more perfect moment to tell him how I feel. “I adore you.” Emotion gathers in my throat as I press a kiss to his knuckles. “I crave you.” I climb to my feet and crawl into his lap, tilting his face up to mine because I need to be looking into his eyes when I say this. “I love you.”
Emotion shines in his eyes as he stares at me. “Say it again,” he whispers, clasping my face in his large hands.
“I love you.”
“Again.”
I laugh as happy tears pool in my eyes. “I love you, Vander. I love you so damn much. It feels like I’ve been waiting for you to show up and infuse life in me.” He kisses me softly, and the joy emanating from his soul is like a beacon of light illuminating his body in a golden halo.
“I love you, Kendall. You have breathed life into me and given me reason to hope.”
“You are so romantic.” I peck his lips as I drag my fingers through his hair. “Sexy too.”
His pupils dilate, and his hands dig into my hips. “I need you,” he says, his voice thick with lust and matching my own need. “I need to feel every part of you fused with every part of me.”
Sliding off his lap, I push the remnants of our dinner to one side of the table before climbing up on the other. I lie back on the table as he stands, widening my legs so he can get into position. We don’t even fully remove our clothes, only the parts that stand in the way of him burying his body deep inside mine.
“I’m making a new rule,” Vander says as we sit on the floor, semi-naked, feeding one another cold leftovers. “Clothing is banned when we’re together.”
I lean back into his chest and giggle. “Considering we are naked more than not, I think it’s a good rule. I approve.” I never thought I would ever be this comfortable naked around a man, but everything comes so naturally with Vander that my nakedness barely registers anymore.
His muscular arms wrap around my waist as he nuzzles my neck. “I did some research too.”
I lean back and look up at him as I shovel the last of the potatoes into his mouth. “You did?”
He nods, and I wait for him to finish eating before he replies. “I wanted to find out if there are other couples like us, and there are tons.” Removing the fork from my fingers, he drops it on the empty plates and pushes them aside. “It’s more common than you think.”
“I know.” I spin around in my underwear facing him. “Did you read about Juliet Mills and Maxwell Caulfield?” Reading about their love brought tears to my eyes. If any couple inspires me and offers hope, it’s them.
He tweaks my nose. “I did. They seemed most similar to us. There’s an eighteen-year difference between them, and they married a few months after meeting on the US tour of The Elephant Man. He was only twenty-one and she was thirty-nine with two failed marriages behind her. She had kids too. They’ve defied all their critics, and they’ve been happily married for thirty-eight years.”
“It was love at first sight, and they believe in soul mates too,” I add.
“Nothing is impossible.” He brushes his fingers over my face and my neck, sweeping his hands across my collarbone, lighting an inferno in his wake.
“I’m not concerned about our age difference anymore,” I truthfully explain. “It doesn’t matter. Not when we connect on this level.” I trace the tattoos on his upper chest with my finger, careful not to touch his Ouroboros because it’s still raised and red-rimmed, like my own ink. “I don’t even care what other people will say. Fuck them.”
He rises, grinning as he pulls me to my feet. “We’re knocking those barriers down, one by one.” Taking my hand, he leads me to his studio.
“The only thing that matters is my children and how they will react. Especially West. That is all I’m worried about now.”
Vander switches the light on in his studio as we enter that side of the apartment. “They will come around in time,” he says, reeling me into his arms. I wrap my arms around his bare waist and press my lips to his chest. He tilts my chin up with his finger. “Does this mean you’re in this for the long haul?”