“You want me, babe?” he asks, holding it between us.
I bite down on my bottom lip, not because I don’t know the answer to that question, but because we’re in a freaking nightclub storage room right now, and I’ve got his cum dripping down my thighs.
This really isn’t the time for some big, heartfelt declaration.
He takes my hesitation for doubt and continues.
“I know that I’m fucked up. I know that this whole situation is fucked up. But I want it, Em. I want you. More than I’ve ever wanted anything. Ever.”
“Theo,” I breathe, but I’m quickly stopped when he presses two fingers to my lips.
“I’m not expecting everything to be forgotten. I don’t want it to be. I deserve to be put through hell for how I’ve treated you. I don’t expect you to move in with me or anything crazy. I just… I want you to say that something might be possible. You don’t even have to wear this if you don’t want to,” he says, taking my hand and playing with the ring he’s pushed onto my finger. “You don’t have to use my name, you don’t have to do any of the wife shit. We can forget about it. And maybe, just maybe, we can revisit it if you’re still with me in a few years.”
Everything in me sags at his words, at the sincerity behind them.
“Theo,” I try again, reaching for him and cupping his jaw in my palm. “I don’t want to forget it all. It might have been painful. But it’s ours. It’s a part of our story. And as fucked up as it is, I wouldn’t change it. Well, maybe parts of it.”
Pain flickers across his features, and I can’t help wondering if he’s thinking about the same things as me. But as much as I might want to know, now isn’t the time.
“Let’s just take it one step at a time, yeah? We’ve still got things to deal with and a lot of stuff to talk about.” I quirk a brow just to let him know how serious I am about it. Because as much as I might want to embrace our past, we bloody well will be talking about it. All of it. Every lie, secret and brutal part of it. There is no way I’m letting him get away with any of it. But I’m fed up of fighting from a distance.
I want this.
I want him.
And it’s time to embrace how we both really feel. It’s been a long time coming.
“But right now, I’ve got your jizz running down my thighs, and I want to go out there, dance with my husband, celebrate his epic win, and hang out with our friends.”
He crowds me, wrapping his hand around the back of my neck and pressing his brow to mine.
“I want to say I couldn’t think of anything better, but that would be a lie.”
“Come on, boss. Let’s go and show everyone how it’s done.”
I take his hand in mine and pull him toward the door.
We get more than a few looks as we emerge from the storage cupboard. Mostly though, it’s jealousy. Holding my head up high, I join the back of the queue for the ladies, which thankfully, is shorter than when we passed it earlier, and I allow Theo to wrap his arms around me and kiss my neck while I wait to clean up.
22
THEO
“Pretty sure I’ve never seen you smile quite this much before,” Seb shouts at me as we’re standing at the bar, waiting for another round of drinks.
I shrug, still unable to wipe the smile off my face.
“It’s fucking great, man. I’m happy for you.”
The moment Emmie emerged from the bathroom earlier, she walked straight into my arms and together we rejoined our friends, who were still grinding it up on the dance floor. Even Nico and Toby had joined, pulling some poor, innocent, unsuspecting girls along with them.
All of them watched our return with knowing smirks on their faces, but fuck it. I don’t care. As long as they know that Emmie is mine and one hundred percent off-limits, then that’s all that matters.
“You aren’t going to get out of it that easily,” I warn him.
He holds his hands up in surrender, a wide smile on his face.
“Got you what you wanted in the end, didn’t it?” I look over his shoulder to where Emmie is standing with Stella and Calli, each of them in their matching dresses. Obviously, Stella has Seb’s name and number on hers. But Calli stuck with Cirillo, giving herself the number one position. I wouldn’t have put it past her to put one of the other guys’ names on the back just to piss me and Nico off.
As much as I love that my cousin has grown a backbone since meeting Stella and Emmie, I also hate it.
It was easier when she was as quiet as a mouse and did as she was told. But I guess we should have known we were on borrowed time.
“You’re so fucking whipped,” Seb laughs.
“Fuck off. You’re just jealous that I put a ring on it first.”
His lips part to argue, but then he looks at Stella and all his argument leaves him. “Yeah, actually. I kinda am.”
“What the fuck happened to us, man? Handing our balls over to them two.”
“Shit could be worse. Cheers, mate,” he says to the barman as my eyes float to Toby, who’s leaning back against the railing, his shoulders lowered in defeat and dark circles around his eyes.
Yeah, shit could be worse. Our entire family could have imploded before our eyes.
Grabbing two of the drinks that have appeared before us. I carry one over to him.
“Here you go, bro.”
It takes him a beat to realise I’m even standing in front of him, and he barely reacts until he spots the drink in my hand. The second he sees it, his eyes light up and he happily takes it from me, knocking it back in one.
Leaning in so he can hear me over the music, I shout, “Tell me what I can do.”
I want to help. I want to make it better for him. But I have no fucking idea how.
“He’s having a fucking funeral next week,” he slurs. “A fucking funeral. People are going to be crying over him. A fucking scumbag like him. He doesn’t deserve for anyone to care that he died. He should be burning in hell, not be laid to fucking rest,” he rants.
“I know, man. I know.” I grab his shoulder, hoping that he gets some kind of support from it. “But it’s not about him. Boss is doing it for other innocent people like you.”
“Anyone who loved a piece of fucking shit like that can’t be innocent.”
I bite back my initial response to point out that his mum must have cared at some point. That is not the kind of support he needs right now.
“He was a master at manipulation. And I get it, I understand why you’re hurting. But the man they lost isn’t the one you know existed.”
“I know, fuck. I know. I just…” The glass in his hand flies toward the floor, shattering around our feet. “I want to burn that fucking church down with them all in it.”
“It won’t help, Tobes.”
“No, it’ll make me just like him,” he spits in disgust.
“You’re nothing like him, man. You’re good. So fucking good. And despite all that shit, you’ve got people around you that love you. A sister,” I say, shooting a look at Stella and my girl. “A sister who would raise hell for you, and a real dad. One I’m pretty sure would do anything to make this better.”