Remaining quiet, he twisted his neck to look at Leo.
Leo had no problem filling in the silence when he had something to say, and it appeared he had a lot to say. “You’ve got it in your head that for this business to be a success you can’t show any weakness. If you’re interested in this woman, that’s not a weakness. And it doesn’t matter how long you’ve known her. That’s also not a sign of weakness.”
Leo had leaned forward in his seat, his head turned to stare at Carson. Under his friend's heavy gaze, Carson finally admitted, “I met her in Afghanistan.”
“What the fuck?” Leo said, his voice uncharacteristically barely a whisper.
“I can’t swear for sure that it was her, but I’m almost positive.”
Leaning back, Leo shook his head. “Christ, did you and she—”
“No, no! She wasn’t a hookup. It was in the hospital when I got injured. Mace got me to the helicopter, and that’s the last I remember until I woke up in the hospital in Kabul. I was scared shitless that I was gonna look down and not have my legs.”
“Fuckin’ hell, bro.”
Nodding slowly, Carson continued. “The nurse attending me had thick hair. Light brown with a lot of blonde in it. And when she turned around and leaned over me, she had light, hazel eyes. I swear I thought I was looking at a lion. I was doped up and high as a kite, and her appearance was a bit fuzzy. We probably didn’t spend more than five minutes together, but as fuckin’ stupid as it sounds for a soldier falling for a nurse he’d just met, she talked to me, explained what was going on, calmed my ass down. Then the doctor came in, she held my hand as I slipped back under, and the next day, I shipped out to Germany for recuperation. Never saw her again.”
“Until Mexico.”
Continuing to nod, Carson said, “Hell, I didn’t get a good look at her until I was in her apartment the night I caught her sneaking around the winery. But now I know it was her I saw in the middle of a mission, standing in a winery that’s a cover for fuckin’ cartel. I thought at the time that there were shadows in the woman’s eyes. I thought maybe it was because she was working for a cartel, and I now know that Jeannie’s probably had those shadows since her time in Afghanistan.”
“So, what are you going to do, man? Just ignore this pull you have for her? Just pretend that she remains in the past and has no place in the future? Not even take a chance to see if there’s anything there? And don’t give me any bullshit about how you can’t have a personal life. We both know that Mace has built a fuckin’ amazing business while meeting someone and getting married.”
“I think it's a little too early to talk about marriage considering I’ve spent today trying to figure out how to avoid her. And even if I wasn’t trying to avoid her, she’s only known me for a couple of days.”
“Avoid trying to avoid her.”
Chortling, Carson shook his head. “Did you just seriously say that to me? Where’d you get that, Relationship Building 101?”
Leo grinned, and the two men watched as the sun finished dipping below the horizon. After several minutes of comfortable silence, Carson asked, “So, what’s your real advice?”
“Hell, boss, considering none of us Keepers are even dating anyone seriously, I’m not sure we should be the ones giving advice. But there’s something about this woman that calls to you. Maybe it’s just because of five minutes shared years ago. But whatever it is, it sounds like she’s in your head. You’re concerned if she’s in harm’s way. You want her safe. Right now, the only way you can take care of her is if you keep her close. And while you're protecting her, take the time to find out if there’s anything else between the two of you besides an old memory.”
“She’s going to be spending time with Maggie on the estate. I don’t know what to do about that, Leo.”
“Then bring her into the fold. You get to keep an eye on her while she keeps an eye on Maggie.” Leo tossed back the rest of his drink and then stood. He looked out over the water for a moment, then turned and dropped his gaze to Carson. “And, if in doing all that, you discover there really is a connection between the two of you, then you owe it to yourself and her to see that through. And that, my friend, is my take on Relationship Building 101.”
Laughing, Carson stood, and the two men clasped hands, offering shoulder slaps at the same time. As Leo headed back to his vehicle, Carson looked out over the painted sunset sky. Sucking in a breath of fresh air, he let it out slowly. Avoid trying to avoid her. Chuckling as he went inside his house, he decided Leo was right. The only way he could keep her truly safe was to keep her close. He just hoped she’d be willing to stay close.
And if she does, then I’ll just have to try to figure out what the hell my next step is!
14
Carson thought he’d be the first one into the office but should have known Rachel and Teddy would be there before him. She was at her desk and Teddy leaned against the edge, and they both turned toward the door as he walked in. Rachel cocked one eyebrow, and he knew he owed her an apology. Never one to shirk from what needed to be done, he glanced toward Teddy before walking straight over. “Rachel, I’ve got no excuse for my mood when I got back in yesterday, but an excuse wouldn’t matter anyway. I just want you to know I’m sorry.”
Her lips curved upward as she shook her head. “Carson, you’re one of the best men I’ve ever worked with, and no one here expects perfection. Hell, bad moods just go with the territory.” She leaned forward, pressed her palms onto the desk, and pushed herself up, holding his gaze with her movements. “But I hope you’ve got yourself straightened out. About everything.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he agreed. “I hope I have, too.”
She winked as she sat back down, and Teddy dipped his chin in greeting as Carson headed into the main workroom. He’d barely poured a cup of coffee when the others began filing in.
“Grab your coffee and anything else you need. We’ll start with the meeting, first thing.”
It didn’t take long for the Keepers to settle around the conference table. Sparing a glance toward Leo, he then cast his gaze toward the others. “I’ve made a decision about the Garza case, but before I go into that, I want to apologize and explain. The apology is for biting heads off yesterday when I got back. The explanation is that using Jeannie Carnes as an asset makes me uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable because it’s a bad idea. Not uncomfortable because I think she’s incapable or untrustworthy. We’ve used other assets before, but I’m uncomfortable because I don’t like the idea of putting her in harm’s way.”
Dolby shook his head. “Boss, I shouldn’t have made that suggestion yesterday. I was out of line—”
Lifting his hand, he stopped Dolby’s words. “Don’t ever think you can’t make a suggestion. That goes for all of you. We’re a team. We work the problems together. We throw out ideas, sift through them, make a plan, adapt to new information, and make new plans. It’s always been that way, and it’ll keep being that way. For me, I was fighting personal feelings.” He swallowed, refusing to drop his gaze as he continued to let it sweep around the table, girding for whatever response he thought would come his way. Not one Keeper raised their brows, dropped their mouths open, or seemed surprised. He glanced toward Leo, catching the chin lift offered. Pressing on, he quickly added, “I never want personal feelings to get in the way of the mission.”