The idea that she would wonder why a man had dumped her was stupid. The only reason that a man would dump Alex Turner was that it finally became clear to him that she was way too good for him.
“I can’t believe you went out with that guy.”
Her eyes flashed with something that looked familiar—anger—and that filled him with satisfaction. Anything that brought the Alex he knew back was worth the price he would pay in her disdain for him.
“Why not?”
Will stopped to think, knowing that it would drive Alex nuts. Instead of answering right away, he walked away from her, toward the walk-in fridge. He knew that he had food that Alex would enjoy in there. And she was a lot less mean to him when she wasn’t hungry.
The clip-clop of her heels on the tile floor told him that she followed him. He let her watch him as he picked out four eggs, some herbs, cheese, milk, and some pastry dough that he’d made yesterday. People would try anything if you wrapped it in pastry dough, and he was testing a meat pastie with an Italian twist for the menu.
“I’m not hungry.”
He looked at her then. “I heard your stomach growling when I was fixing your knee.”
Her fingers twitched. He liked that. It told him that she wasn’t as unaffected by him as she tried to appear all the time. He knew what he’d done at the end of that long-ago summer. He’d wounded her pride. All along, he’d known that she wouldn’t want to be with him if she really knew him. He was just someone new. A novel toy to play with. Even back then, Alex had known that boys liked her. He hadn’t been willing to be discarded, so he’d pushed her away.
And he’d been paying for it ever since. But it was way too late to do anything about it at this point.
“Fine. But I’m not staying long enough for you to make anything.”
Will shrugged. “I have to eat before my sous chef gets here, or I’ll be too hungry to taste anything objectively.”
It was partially true. He’d pushed himself hard during his workout this morning. And it wasn’t because he was thinking about Alex and that Andrew guy. He needed protein before getting to work or they’d end up with some truly wild things on the menu.
He found a bowl and cracked some eggs into it, and Alex finally sat down. She was only ever nice to him when he was feeding her. He turned to chopping onions, and he could feel her gaze on his hands. He loved that she was so lusty about food. It was one of the many things he didn’t allow himself to think about very often.
Lexi was the only family he acknowledged, and Alex was her most precious thing. If anything happened between them, if Alex got hurt, Lexi would cut him out without a spare thought. And, according to his ex, he couldn’t sustain a relationship with anyone because he had the communication skills of a stump.
But sometimes just waiting someone out worked. Like now. Alex wouldn’t let a silence go unfilled forever. “Jason getting married has me all fucked up.”
“That fucking guy?” Will liked Jason even less than he liked Andrew. There was something smarmy and disingenuous about the guy, and he’d always felt like he’d dated Alex more because of her connection with Lexi than because of any affection for Alex. Lexi was never that keen on Jason, other than saying how attractive he was. But after talking about his appearance, Lexi had sniffed and stabbed at the filet mignon Will had prepared. The emphasis of the stabbing had told him all he’d needed to know about Jason.
“So?” Will didn’t understand why she was so upset about this. Alex had also made her feelings on marriage extremely clear. Practically the third thing he’d learned about Alex Turner was that she didn’t believe in marriage. It wasn’t until later—after meeting her father—that he’d learned why. “You weren’t going to marry him.”
“He was on Say Yes to the Dress.”
“What the fuck is Say Yes to the Dress?”
Alex slapped the stainless steel worktable. “You’ve never seen it?”
Will shrugged. He was not a man who looked down on stuff coded as girly or gay. He loved Real Housewives and Drag Race, partially because Lexi had introduced him to them and partially because they were really fucking entertaining. But a show about saying yes to dresses would never have piqued his interest. He liked nice clothes but wasn’t terribly interested in dresses.
“It’s about wedding dresses. Jason’s fiancée was on there, picking out her wedding dress and talking about how romantic her story with Jason was.”
“And this bothers you why?” Alex had never seemed bothered by a breakup before. After all, if relationships were a scam, then why would you be upset if you willingly signed up for a scam, knowing what it was, and it eventually ended?
“I didn’t know why it bothered me until I started doing research and realized that it’s definitely a pattern that guys seem to get married or get into committed relationships right after we break up.”
“You don’t want to get married, so I still don’t see why this bothers you.” The only time they’d ever gotten into a real fight— something that wasn’t just them sniping at each other when they were both at Lexi’s house—was right before his wedding. Alex had never said anything about him getting married other than a mumbled “Congratulations.” He’d found out that she thought he was making a huge mistake when she’d barged into Lexi’s kitchen—not knowing he was there—yelling about why people got married when it was logically the dumbest thing they could do with their lives and their money.
Will had never been tempted to shake someone so much.
“Maybe it’s because you’re not nice to them?”
Alex scowled at him. “What’s with men? Expecting women to be nice to them. Women are brought up to expect no one being nice to them—maybe ever.”
“That’s kind of a generalization, don’t you think?”
Then she crossed her arms over her chest and he knew he was about to get the business. He secretly kind of loved the business when it came from Alex. He should probably take a look at that, but he was going to enjoy it first.
“Little girls are taught that little boys are mean to them because they like them—”
“That was never the problem with you and me. I never liked you.”
“Shut up.” She held up a hand. “You were not a little boy when we met. You were a teen boy. And teen girls are taught that cishet teen boys are the monsters in the bushes, because they are.” She paused for a moment. “Present company excluded.”
There she was with the thing again, but she was not going to be deterred. “We’re not even taught to expect that other girls will be nice to us because we have to be mean to each other to establish supremacy so that the monsters in the bushes will be nice when they’re trying to use us to establish supremacy. And we’re not even getting to the part where I talk about what little girls who aren’t white are taught to expect.”