Violet’s breath hiccupped, and her hands covered her mouth as tears welled in her eyes. “Oh my God, Jami, that’s awful. How did you get him to stop?”
“Anderson intervened, ripping the crop from my dad’s hand and pulling the horse into the barn. The moment we walked away, the asshole fell to the ground in an emotional heap, sobbing uncontrollably, crying out his apologies.” Even while I spoke the words, and knowing just how sorry my father was, I realized the damage was done. I was scarred in more ways than just physical.
When she started shaking, I wrapped my arms around her again, burying my mouth in the crook of her neck. “I’m okay. I promise.”
“How can you be okay after what that monster did to you? I hate him. We should tell someone. He should get arrested.”
I squeezed her harder. “Shh, it’s okay, Vi. He won’t touch me again.”
“How do you know that?”
The truth was, I didn’t know that. I just wanted her to feel better. “I won’t let him. I really don’t want to talk about it anymore. I need distractions right now. Tell me about you.” I pulled her to the bed, guiding her to lay beside me. “You finished your finals?”
Her eyes searched mine. “Yeah. Earlier today.” A few beats of silence rested between us. “I was going to ask how you all are doing, but I think you’ve already answered that question.”
Somehow I managed to sift through the pain to find my answer. “Yeah. Not so great. I’m not coming back, Vi.”
Disappointment clouded her expression when she realized I wasn’t only talking about college, but she didn’t question my decision.
She scooted closer, wrapping her arms around me, and for the first time in over a month, I could feel my heartbeat again. “Is it okay that I’m here?”
I wrapped an arm around her back. “I’m glad you are. How long are you staying?”
“As long as you want me to stay.”
I hoped she would say that. Sighing, I squeezed her to me. “Can you stay for the summer? We can give you a job here. Anything you want to do.” The desperation was not lost in my voice. “Just please stay.”
There hadn’t been a summer since I’d met her that she stayed put. There was always a pool tournament or a dance clinic to take her away. But this time, she melted into my embrace and said, “Okay.”
When her eyes met mine again, they were wet with emotion, and I realized something I’d been too grief-stricken to see before. Violet lost Tyson too. Emotion swarmed my chest and clogged my throat, bringing my own sadness to my eyes. We lay together for the longest time, holding each other and crying until our lips met in the softest kiss.
I wasn’t even sure who leaned into who first, but it was my hand that slipped beneath the fabric of her shorts and slid over her ass. We kissed until our lips were bruised and our breaths were nothing but shallow pants. When she stood and peeled her tank top from her body then pulled her shorts down to the floor, I didn’t hesitate to undress too.
There were no thoughts about what came next, no second-guesses about what we were about to do. There were just desperate hands, tangled limbs, and two bared souls molding into one. At nineteen years old, we were both virgins, but it was her who took the reins that night.
She straddled me so we were sitting face to face, and I was grateful for the moonlight that streamed down on her through the blinds, revealing every inch of her curvy body. Full breasts, erect nipples, small waist, and perfectly full hips and thighs. I would never forget that image of her full lips parting while she placed my hand on her center, curled two fingers up into her, and pulled me inside like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Her lids fluttered closed, and her hips started to rock while my fingers pumped her slowly. I was so hard, so ready all I could do was imagine how her tight hole would squeeze around my cock. I wasn’t entirely sure it was possible until she lifted, causing my fingers to slip out from inside her, and then she aligned me to her entrance.
The first sensation of my tip entering her caused a sharp gasp to lift from my throat. She was so wet, but not even the slippery nature of our bodies joining could help the fact that my dick appeared to be three times the size of her opening. Even her mouth was open and her eyes wide, like the pressure was almost too much.
“Are you okay?” I gasped.
Violet had always been a determined one, but it wasn’t until that moment, watching her stretch around my shaft, that I realized how ambitious she could be. She didn’t speak, but she continued to take all of me without pause.
My entire body lit with sensations, but I’d never felt pleasure like that in my life. I was even more shocked when she started to move. Her hips rocked gently in different directions, like she was getting used to all the angles of me, testing her rhythm.
When I couldn’t stand it anymore, I lifted my knees slightly, forcing her body to lean in closer to me. I wove my fingers through her hair and pulled her mouth to mine in a kiss that I never wanted to end. As much as I wanted to see every roll of her sexy hips, I needed her kiss more.
It had only been a minute, but I knew I wouldn’t last long. I hoped she wouldn’t either, but I knew I had to do everything I could to make sure that we finished together. My hands moved to her breasts then to her hips until I was digging my fingertips into her skin and guiding her in one steady direction. We kept the pace slow—and I hoped that would help me last a little bit longer—until I heard her cry out.
“Jami. Oh my God. I-I’m coming.”
That was all it took for whatever strength I had to give out, and I moved her faster, trying to chase the orgasm already building inside me. “Fuck, this feels so good.”
I was well aware of how choppy my voice sounded as I began to spill inside her. My whole body buzzed, and my movements became as choppy as the words that I grunted out during my release. She moaned out hers, her pitch high and filled with a feeling of ecstasy I would never forget.
Neither of us spoke about the condom I should have been wearing. Our first time was too good to tarnish its memory with words of regret. But when her period came two weeks later, confirming she wasn’t pregnant, I knew I couldn’t go bare like that ever again.
Sex with Violet became a regular occurrence that summer, but there was no talk of a relationship. We both knew that she was going back to Western in the fall, and I would be staying at the camp. Besides, I wasn’t sure if she gave herself to me that night because she pitied me and would have done anything to provide a distraction to the deep pain circling through me.
Whatever her reasons, I had my own. Unfortunately, it would take me years to finally admit them out loud.
I was deeply, irrevocably in love with my best friend.
Chapter Nineteen
JAMISON
Our trip to San Juan Island goes far too fast for my liking. Once I park the boat at the San Juan Island Marina, we make the short walk to Violet’s apartment.
She flips around to face me at the base of the steps. “You don’t need to come up. I’ll just be a minute.”
My muscles tense while my brain struggles with what she’s telling me. “I’m here to help, Vi. Let me.”
Her smile is soft and seemingly appreciative, but she shakes her head. “Please, Jami. There’s not much to see up there, and I’m only grabbing a few things.” She lifts her two empty suitcases as proof. She’d already mentioned that she didn’t want to move her entire apartment today—hence the boat ride—because it would be too jarring a change for Brayden.