Ben pulls through the drive-thru of the Farmhouse, a huge restaurant that features wagon wheel chandeliers, corrugated metal siding, and exposed brick. If I didn’t look like a Law & Order: Special Victims Unit extra right now, I’d want to go inside.
We grab some breakfast sandwiches, and he pulls into a park. Under the shade of a massive oak tree, we roll down the windows and tuck into our food.
After a few bites, I decide it’s time to tell him what happened last night.
I turn, lifting my knee onto the seat so my back is to the window. “My flight was cancelled.”
“Christ, Sienna. I’m sorry. I should’ve checked that before I dropped you off. The drive home was treacherous, so I’m not surprised.”
His concern goes a long way to restoring my faith in humanity.
I explain how I couldn’t call anyone because my phone had died. One of the nurses charged it early this morning so we could track down someone to pick me up. By the time I get to discovering Cal in bed with three freaking women, the vein in Ben’s temple is throbbing.
“That motherfucker. I’m gonna beat his ass.” Ben closes his eyes for a long moment. “Did he hit you? Because if he did, I have a shovel.”
“No, he didn’t hit me. If he did, I’d help you dig the hole.” I smile at Ben, and some of the somberness in his eyes lifts. “One of the girls nailed me in the head with a bottle after I shoved all of his shit out of the window.”
I explain how I went off the deep end for a bit and took it out on Cal’s electronics, and Ben nods.
“He totally deserved that. Good for you.”
“But here’s the worst part.” I glance at the dash. “One of the girls was Destiny, my best friend. Former best friend, I should say. The one who moved in with me earlier this summer.”
“And I thought I was having a bad day.”
I take in the dark circles under his eyes. I know something was going on with him. “What happened? Not gonna judge because I just got mixed up in some tabloidy shit, but you look a little rough too.”
A long, aggravated sigh leaves him. “You’re never gonna guess.”
“Aliens abducted you and probed your ass?”
He gives me a horrified look and laughs. “No, weirdo. But thanks for that visual.”
“Made ya laugh.”
His eyes soften, and he winks. “You do have that effect on me for some reason.”
If I weren’t hopped up on pain medication, that wink would probably make my pulse race.
He shakes his head. “Last fall, when our house was dealing with that paternity scare, I was feeling pretty smug when I was let off the hook.”
A foreboding sensation steals over me. A million scenarios race through my mind. None of them are good.
He continues, his broody vibe increasing tenfold. “Caught up with my ex last night.”
“I didn’t know you even had an ex. No offense, but I always thought you were a one-and-done kind of guy.”
I’m sure Ben doesn’t remember this, but he and I lived in the same dorm freshman year, and he went through women faster than I could count. It’s why I never introduced myself to him. Plus, he never noticed me, and that was that.
Call me prideful, but I’d rather a man notice me for me than me fawn all over him like the girls in our dorm. At the time, it reminded me of how women throw themselves at my father, which... ew.
My old shrink would call that transference. Subconsciously, I transferred my disdain for my father—and the playboy reputation he developed after the divorce—to Ben. Which I know is wrong. Who am I to judge someone’s sexual history anyway? But that never stopped me from being really attracted to the guy. It just made me cautious.
It’s ironic given the fact I got cheated on by Cal, who’s rumored to be the biggest player on campus. But I didn’t believe that when we met or I would’ve taken greater pains to get to know him better before we got so involved. I’d never seen Cal in action, so to speak. Plus, he swore up and down that the gossip was baseless.
Ben’s cheeks turn ruddy. “I wouldn’t say I’ve had much of a track record in college for you to think differently, but I did have a long-term girlfriend in high school.”
I’m instantly jealous of this nameless, faceless woman. “How long were you guys together?”
“Two years. Maybe a little more.” A lost look shadows his expression for a moment before his eyes go hard.
“Wow.” I clear my throat. “Why’d you guys go your separate ways?”
He tells me how Janelle broke up with him out of the blue, started dating this other guy almost immediately and got pregnant. He always suspected that she cheated on him.
Ben’s generally a quiet, solitary kind of man. This is the longest conversation we’ve ever had, so I can’t exactly wrap him in a hug even though I want to.
“Which brings me to last night,” he says. “I don’t know what I thought she had to say after all this time. We hadn’t spoken since high school.”
“Why’d you go? I mean, if she broke your heart, why would you give her the time of day?” It’s obvious he still has feelings for Janelle. But if Cal Winston showed up three years after the fact, I’d slam the door in his face. He is dead to me. No amount of time will change that. I’m all about giving people second chances, but what I saw last night marked the point of no return.
The pink hue in Ben’s cheeks rises, and I chuckle. His expression is so sheepish, I can’t help it. It feels good to laugh even though it makes my head pound.
“I get it.” I roll my eyes. Men are so predictable sometimes. “You wanted to get laid.”
He shrugs, embarrassment making him grin. “Olly and Johnny talked me into it.”
“Shut up. You totally went with your dick in your hand, ready for action.” I snort.
This is good. This is what I need to hear. How jocks will do anything, even face the ex who shredded their hearts, to have sex. I’ve always had some hardcore lust for athletes, but this fascination has never done me any favors. I need to find a nice engineer or accountant to date.
All of a sudden, I understand why Ben’s sister Gabby hated football players when we met. At the time, I thought she was too rigid in wanting to protect herself, but maybe I was the one who was short-sighted. The fact that she and her boyfriend Rider, the number-one draft pick, are now madly in love is the anomaly. I’d do well to remember this.
Ben chuckles. “You don’t hold back, do you, woman?”
“Life’s too short.”
At my statement, he grows somber again and nods, and I immediately regret my words. I know he lost his father when he was little, and then his mom when he was seven. His uncle adopted him, and Gabby went to live with different relatives. From what I’ve heard from his sister, Ben harbors a lot of regret and guilt about the conditions she found herself in while he had it relatively easy with his uncle.
I grab his hand before I think better of it. “I’m sorry. That was insensitive.”
He gives me a gentle squeeze and lets go. “No, you’re right. Life is really damn short sometimes.” He sighs. “But that’s not exactly why I went to see Janelle last night.” It’s his turn to roll his eyes. “You’re gonna laugh when I tell you.”