“I want to make you happy.”
I’m glad she’s found her voice, and she’s telling me what she wants, but those six words confirm that my cock will not be going anywhere near her pussy. Not tonight. I don’t want her to want me inside her to make me happy. I want her to want it because it will make her happy. Call me a pussy, or take my man card or whatever, but she’s lived her life for everyone else. I won’t let her make decisions like this because she thinks that’s what she needs to do to make me happy.
Her breathing makes me happy.
I just have to prove that to her.
“Wow,” she breathes. I find her eyes, and they’re locked on my cock.
“Rams,” I growl. “Baby, you can’t look at me like that. I’m barely holding on to my control.”
“Tell me what to do.”
“You want the ache to go away?”
“Yes.”
“On the bed.”
She drags her panties over her thighs and lets them pool at her feet. Stepping out of them, she does as I ask and climbs on the bed. “Where do you want me?”
“Head on the pillow, beautiful.” She shimmies until her dark hair is splayed out, and the sight gives me pause.
“Are you all right?” she asks softly.
“I’m just memorizing this moment.”
“Please.” She presses her thighs together. It’s as if my words have caused the ache in her pussy to grow. Maybe they did. I know my cock is weeping for her.
I move to the bed, my boxer briefs still on. “Open for me,” I instruct in a voice that does not sound like my own. Her legs fall open, and her pussy glistens for me, calling my name. She’s bare, and that surprises me. “Is this for me?” I ask, running my finger through her folds.
“For both of us, I guess.”
“I approve,” I tell her. Then I move, letting my legs hang off the bed, and kiss her bare pussy. When my tongue takes its first taste, she bucks off the bed. I slide my hand up to hold her still as I drink my fill of her.
“Deacon,” she pants. “Oh, shit.”
Her cry of pleasure is all the incentive I need. I suck on her clit while sliding a finger inside her, making her thighs squeeze my head. Placing my hands under her ass, I lift her to get a better angle, and her legs completely trap me.
Fuck yes.
The only way I can describe the next few minutes is an out-of-body experience. I eat at her like she’s my last meal. Her legs grip me tightly, and she buries her hands in my hair. She’s moaning my name, and “more,” and “please,” and I give her what she wants.
What she needs.
When her pussy grips my fingers, I know she’s close. My mouth closes over her clit, and she erupts like a rocket. I don’t stop until her legs fall open, her hands release from my hair, and her body relaxes into the mattress.
This is a night I will never forget.
This moment with her has changed me.
My heart is no longer my own.
seventeen
Ramsey
My heart is racing. My limbs are weak, and I’m lying naked on his bed. I should move to cover up or thank him for tilting my world on its axis. However, all I can do is lie here and try to catch my breath and calm my heart before it pounds out of my chest.
The bed dips beside me and I peer over. Deacon is on his side, his large hand resting on my quivering belly as he watches me. “There she is,” he whispers.
“Thank you.” I manage two words in my catatonic state.
“You thanked me when you came all over my tongue. Otherwise, I don’t need your thanks.” He leans in and presses his lips to mine. It’s a chaste kiss, and after where his mouth just was, you would think that I would shy away, but I want anything he’s willing to give me.
“That was worth a thank-you. That’s the least I can do.” I’m very aware that I sound like the inexperienced woman that I am, but I can’t seem to find it in me to care. “I’ve never,” I start but then shake my head, keeping my confession to myself.
“You’ve never?” He slides his hand over my pussy, and traces through what I’m sure is a sticky mess, but again, I don’t seem to have the energy to care. I’m sure once I feel like myself again, I’ll be mortified.
“It’s nothing.”
“Rams, come on now. Don’t get shy on me. Tell me. There is nothing you can say that’s wrong. Just tell me the first thing that comes to your mind.”
“I’ve never done that. Or had that done to me,” I blurt.
“That’s because he was a selfish asshole,” he grumbles.
He leans in for another kiss, and his erection presses against my thigh. “What about you?”
“I’m not a selfish asshole.” He winks.
“Oh, trust me, I know. What about you?” I nod to his erection.
“I’m fine. Tonight was about you.”
“I want it to be about you too.”
“We’ll get there,” he promises.
“That has to be uncomfortable, right?”
“I’ll take care of it.”
“How?”
He raises his hand and winks. “I’m good, sweetheart, I promise.”
“Can I watch?” I ask.
He sputters and coughs. “You want to watch me jack my cock?”
“Yes.” I don’t know why, but suddenly I have no problem telling him what I want. I might be embarrassed when I come off my orgasm high, but right now, I’m rolling with it.
I watch as he removes his hand from where he was leisurely exploring my pussy and rolls to his back. He lifts his hips and removes his boxer briefs. He takes his cock in his hand and strokes slowly from the base to the tip. His head turns to me, and the corner of his mouth lifts in a grin. “I’ll never be able to say no to you.”
“Nothing?” I ask, a plan already forming in my mind.
“There is nothing that you could ask for that I wouldn’t try my fucking best to deliver.”
“So what if I said I want to do it.”
“Do what?”
“That.” I point to where he’s fisting his cock. “Can I touch you?” I ask, just as he has asked me so many times before.
“Always. You never have to ask for permission with me, Ramsey. There is no one else but you.” His gaze is intense, so I look away and reach for his cock. He grabs my wrist, and I flinch but don’t pull away.
“Fuck. I’m sorry, Rams. I didn’t mean,” he starts, but I lean over and kiss him to shut him up.
“It’s okay. I’m okay. I flinched a little, and I might always, but there was no panic or fear. Not with you.”
“Doesn’t matter. I knew better. You made the boundaries clear.”
“Fuck the boundaries,” I say, surprising both of us. “I don’t want boundaries. Not with you.” I stare him down, willing him to see the truth in my eyes. “Never with you.”
He swallows hard. “Never with me.” He nods, letting me know he hears what I’m saying.
It’s the best I can do without telling him that he owns my heart. I’m not ready to bare that truth just yet.