“No problem.” He nodded. “Glad I was home.”
He didn’t mean it as an attack on me, but it was another dagger to my chest. Another thing telling me the bubble I had been living in, when it came to Emery, had just popped.
Peter and Grandpa said their goodbyes before the house was back to the three of us.
“Can I get you anything?” I went to my grandpa, fear swimming in my stomach, seeing him look so frail and old.
“Just some water. Gonna take some painkillers and nap.”
I got water for both, standing over them like a helicopter parent.
“Mason, we’re fine. Please stop hovering. Go on with your day.” Grandma waved me off. “He’s going to be asleep in ten minutes with the game on, and I’ll probably be napping in five.” Grandma curled up with the cat, her lids already drifting closed. “Please.”
“Okay, but I will keep my phone on me, and I’ll only be gone a little while.” I still hesitated, not wanting to leave them and not wanting to do what I knew I needed to. Going back to Emery’s was no longer something good. It wouldn’t be pancakes and sex.
It would be gutting raw agony.
My hand went to my head, everything spinning on me, my muscles wobbly. My stomach growled, but acid burned through it, making me nauseous.
Soft snores came from my grandpa, my gaze jumping between them, seeing my grandma’s lids flutter closed. Blocks of emotion stacked on top of the other. I wasn’t ready for them to go. To be without them. They had been my rock, and I was terrified of how adrift I would be once they were gone. Would everything feel even more meaningless?
The only thing I knew was this could never happen again. They were my priority. The ones who had loved me through all the dark times. No matter what my grandmother said, I needed to be here. Emery and I both understood our little fling couldn’t go anywhere…
Jogging back to Emery’s, my skin sticky, my head pounding, knowing I wasn’t coming back to make breakfast, but to end it.
It was the only right thing to do. For her as well.
My head a blur, my heart hammering, I walked straight into her house, struggling to catch my breath. “Emery?”
“Mason?” The girly voice shot my head over toward the hallway in shock.
Oh. Fuck. Addison. She wasn’t supposed to be home.
She stood there, holding a pair of her white cheer shoes like she had forgotten them, her forehead wrinkling in confusion. “What are you doing here?” Addison’s attention went to the door I causally walked through, drifting to the bruising bite marks I had on my neck.
Emery came out of the kitchen, stopping dead. Panic widened her eyes for a moment, then she jerked her head to Addison.
“Oh… I asked him to look at the dishwasher again.”
It was so slow, or maybe it was fast; time seemed to have stopped. Addison’s head twisted back and forth between us, then her gaze slowly went to the jacket hanging over the end of the couch closes to her. The one I left here.
Her attention stayed on it, then slid back to me, stopping on my bruised neck, her chest starting to rise and fall as if she was putting pieces together, understanding what had been right in front of her this whole time.
It was like more bricks crashed down on my chest. My pulse drummed in my ears, my hand grabbing for the wall, trying to keep steady. Sound hazed out, making everything far away, my lungs gasping for air. Blackness seeped into my vision, and I felt myself tip to the side. Somewhere in the distance I heard my name being screamed, but then everything went silent. Dark.
Time hadn’t stopped.
I had.
Chapter 31
Emery
“Mason!” A scream bellowed from me as his body dropped to the ground. Fear carved through my gut, my legs already darting for him, knocking Addison out of the way. “Mason!” I screamed again, falling down next to him, flipping him over on his back. A deep-rooted guttural terror rose into my chest, pounding my heart with panic. Don’t leave me. Don’t leave me too. “Mason?” I leaned my ear against his chest, trying to hear his heartbeat. My body was shaking so badly I didn’t know if it was him or me.
“Oh god! Mason! Is he okay? Oh my god!” Addison squawked around me, flipping and flapping.
“Call 911. Now!” I screamed at her. She nodded, grabbing for her phone and dialing. I tuned her out, concentrating on him.
“Mason, please…” I batted back my tears, starting CPR. My training was rusty, but it made me focus on my steps instead of my terror.
Addison stayed talking to the operator, telling her everything, until we both heard ambulance sirens wailing in the air, pulling up in front of my house.
They rushed through my front door, taking over for me.
“Is he okay?” Addison continued to wail.
“He’s breathing.” A woman nodded, she and the other two EMTs getting him on a gurney. I didn’t hesitate, running alongside them. I would not leave his side.
“Addison, take my car. Phone Grace and Neal. Tell them I will call them as soon as we arrive.”
Addison nodded at my directions as I climbed into the ambulance, sitting down next to his unconscious form, my hand wrapping around his, biting back the tears strangling my throat.
I can’t lose him. I can’t…
The state of being so hyper aware that nothing felt real had swooped in like a bad dream. The same bitter taste on my tongue, the feeling my brain couldn’t quite register anything around me. The panic, the terror, the grief already choking me.
My fingers laced with his, squeezing. “Please, Mason.” I reached up, brushing back his hair, watching his chest rise up and down until we got to the hospital. It was a blur of nurses, doctors, and words I didn’t understand.
“Miss, you can’t go back there.” A male nurse stopped me as they rolled Mason past me.
“But…”
“You have to stay out here. Someone will be out as soon as we know anything.” The man turned and disappeared behind the door.
Minutes or years could have gone by. I stood there, my life replaying itself. It was a horror that left me a shell once again, though it felt worse this time, because I knew what was on the other side.
Numbness kept me in that spot until I felt someone touch my arm.
“Aunt Emery?” My head turned, and I blinked at the girl, taking a beat to register it was Addison. “Come sit.”
I didn’t want to, but being no more than a zombie, I let her lead me to the seating area, where a tiny, fragile-looking woman sat.
“Grace?” I jolted at her appearance.
“She wanted to come with me,” Addison explained.
“You shouldn’t be here, though. You are still recovering.” I went to her, suddenly having another focus to put my energy on.
“My grandson’s life is far more important than that.” She gripped my hand, a tear sliding out. “I feel this is my fault.”
“Why?”
“Mason works so hard to please us and takes on so much. Neal fell this morning getting out of bed and had to be taken to the doctor by our neighbor. He feels he let us down by not coming home last night. Not being there.”
On the other side of Grace, I saw Addison’s head snap my way, but my gaze wouldn’t meet hers.