There wasn’t much to choose from in this library. It was more than obvious that it hadn’t been updated in what was likely decades.
“That was a gag gift from Fox.”
I looked up to find Con standing in the doorway, his sweaty shoulder leaning against the doorjamb as he stared at me assessing.
“It’s not very good,” I told him. “Though, it was the most interesting one that was in your whole library.”
His lips twitched. “There are some of the most famous works of some of the most well-known authors in the entire world in this library. What do you mean you couldn’t find something better?”
I could hear the amusement in his tone, and something inside my chest loosened.
“I’m not really a non-fiction reader. Nor am I in the mood to read something that’ll make me cry. Which half of your books would do at this point.”
He frowned.
“I’m ready to talk about last night if you are,” he lied.
I snorted.
“Then why are your fists clenched so tightly that they’re bloodless?” I challenged him. “And speaking of blood, you haven’t fed from me, or me from you, in well over twenty-four hours. Fox told me that most new vampires can’t go more than twelve without deteriorating.”
“Fox is right, under most circumstances,” he agreed. “But we already knew you were a special case.”
“Why am I a special case?” I challenged.
“I don’t know,” he admitted. “The fact that you don’t crave the blood that others do is the most confusing, but without being able to draw your labs, things are going to stay confusing.”
I sighed.
“Which gets us to another topic,” I told him, crossing my arms over my upraised legs. “How long are we going to have to stay here?”
I didn’t let any of the fear that I felt about going back into the real world leach into my voice. I was cool, calm, and collected. At least outwardly.
If I let my fears out to play, he’d freak out, and I didn’t want him to freak out on me a second time in one day.
“I’m going back tomorrow,” he answered. “You’re going back when I decide that it’s safe.”
“What makes you think this place is safe?” I asked him. “If it was safe, that woman you’re so obviously freaking out silently about is…” His face went blank. “Yeah, I know you’re freaking out. I deduced that it wasn’t a good thing. You don’t have to hide stuff like this from me. I’m not a child. I’m a grown adult that’s been making decisions for herself for years.”
“And how did that work out for you?” he hissed.
My eyebrows rose.
He cursed.
“I’m sorry.” He exhaled. “There’s a connection I’m missing,” he said, sitting down facing me on the coffee table next to the couch. “I haven’t seen her since the night of the house fire. Then, all of a sudden, my baby is ready to move on to the afterlife, and she’s here to help her along? No, it doesn’t make sense. There’s something more at play here, and I haven’t figured it out yet.”
I nodded, happy that he was actually discussing this with me.
“And have you gone to the grave yet?” I asked. “You told me that she never left her grave. How was she able to do that this time?” My brain spun wildly. “And how did that woman know where to come? Has she ever been here before?” I let my feet fall to the ground and leaned forward. “Fox told me this place was a fairly new development for you. That it was built to protect those of your family that needed protection. A safe house of sorts.”
He nodded grimly. “I thought it was a safe house. And it might still be one. Ghosts have no rules or regulations that they live by. If they want to go somewhere, there’s nothing to stop them from doing so.”
“So, where has this wife of yours been hiding all of these years?” I tilted my head sideways. “And who was to say that she actually died in that house fire?”
He opened his mouth to answer me and then snapped it back shut.
“I don’t…” He paused. “I don’t know.”
I nodded grimly.
“It was obvious that your daughter died due to her being incorporeal,” I said. “She also hasn’t aged. Has your wife aged?”
“She’s not my wife anymore,” he muttered. “And I didn’t see her, you did.”
I thought back to what went through my mind when it came to the woman.
“She was young. She didn’t look like she was much over the age of twenty-two or three,” I told him.
“She was twenty when she died.” He stopped, licked his lips, and then cursed. “She could be a vampire. That would explain her not aging.”
I frowned.
“What does a vampire feel like?”
He brought my hand up to his chest, and I pinched him.
He cursed and stepped away.
However, I was delighted to see he had a smile on his face. Although small, it was there.
“There are two ways to check,” he said, his grin becoming wider and wider. “But first, I need to speak to the men.”
“Con?”
I stopped him when he went to step back inside.
“Yeah?”
I bit my lip.
“I lost a baby.”
His head tilted.
“I know.”
I looked down at my feet.
“I loved that baby,” I told him. “I wanted the baby so bad. But I knew that I couldn’t provide the kind of life that she would need. So I chose adoption.”
He wrapped his arms around me.
“I lost the baby during her birth. A baby that I didn’t plan to keep. It was for the best, giving her up for adoption, yet I still feel it like a hollowed-out hole in my heart.”
He squeezed me tighter.
“I love you,” he told me softly.
My eyes closed tightly.
“I love you, too,” I replied back just as softly.
“And I would’ve loved your child, too,” he murmured. “Just because neither one of our children are here any longer, doesn’t mean that we can’t still love them as if they were.”
And with that, I fell just a little bit more in love with him.
“Let’s go figure out what else there is to find out.”
I didn’t like talking about losing my baby. It’d been a stupid one-night stand after I’d tried everything in my power to screw my life up after my father had died, and a baby had ensued from that one night.
But the symbol of life had come at a time when I’d been missing my dad more than ever. Been missing the life I used to have. And pairing the death with the fact that I was at a low point in my life had been the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back.
Knowing that Con understood me, and didn’t think I was weird or stupid for loving a baby I didn’t even really have the chance to know meant the world to me. He meant the world to me.
I just had to prove to him that I could be a great person to have on his side.
Not just a woman that was good to pass the time with.
CHAPTER 22
Fuck.
-the best, most universal word in the English language