“Are you still embarrassed, baby?” Buck asks.
“Not usually,” she says. “But what happened on that island is a part of all of us now, and sometimes it creeps back in. It’s normal. Ask any therapist.”
“Kelly’s having a more difficult time than some of the others,” I say. “And I get the feeling that her mother is behind it.”
“You don’t mean…” Buck says. “Behind her abduction?”
“I wasn’t even thinking that.” My flesh goes cold, as if my blood were freezing in my veins. “What if she was? Katelyn’s cousin was behind her abduction. Aspen’s teammates were behind hers. Why couldn’t it be someone as close as a parent?”
“Wow…” Lacey says.
“It’s just a theory,” I say. “It’s doubtful. But I honestly don’t know much about the relationship between Kelly and her mother. All I know is that Kelly was a waitress at a diner in Phoenix for five years before she was taken. She probably wasn’t living with her mother at that time.”
“See what you can find out,” Reid says. “My curiosity is definitely piqued. In the meantime, we won’t push Kelly to see her mother.”
“We shouldn’t be pushing these women to do anything,” Lacey says.
“Of course not,” Reid agrees. “That’s not what I meant.”
Lacey smiles. “I know that.”
“So what else is going on?” Buck asks.
“A few things. Lily’s moving out of the building, which is good. She’s going home to Montana. A few more women have bypassed the apartment altogether. They’re leaving straight from the retreat center and going home. So right now, after Lily leaves, Francine, Marianne, Brindley, and Kelly will be the only ones in the apartment. Most of the women are now ready to be on their own or at the apartment, so if no one else comes to the apartment, we’ll begin getting it ready for leasing.”
“While Kelly and the others are still there?”
“It’s all preliminary,” Reid says. “We won’t open up the apartment to anyone else until they’re all ready to leave.”
“Good.”
Kelly won’t be comfortable with anyone else living in that apartment building other than women from the island.
“Wonderful news about Lily,” Aspen says. “I’ll have to have lunch with her before she leaves.”
“She’s done very well,” Lacey says. “We’re all proud of her.”
“It seems like all the women have done well,” I say. “Except, of course for…”
“Our retreat center is top-notch,” Rock says. “Riley and Matt, her husband, have brought in the best psychiatrists and psychologists that our money can buy. Most of the women are ready to leave within a year. Some of them want to go straight home. Most of them, actually. We only have two more women at the retreat center now, and we’re getting great reports from their doctors.”
“That’s wonderful,” Aspen says. “Now, what do we do with Kelly?”
They all stare at me.
“Don’t look at me. I’m no therapist.”
“No one says you are,” Rock says. “But keep us apprised with what you find out about her mom.”
“Absolutely. I absolutely will. I’ll get started on that tonight. In fact, I will pay her a visit while Kelly is safe at The Glass House.”
30
KELLY
For the umpteenth time, I paste a smile on my face.
“Good evening, my name is Kelly, and I’ll be taking care of you this evening. May I start you off with a cocktail?”
I take the drink orders quickly for my table of six, and then I head to the bar.
I’ve been here for three hours, and things are going well so far. I’m a good server. I’m good at keeping a lot of things in my head at once. I’m determined to show Linda that she did the right thing by hiring me.
But Linda’s not here tonight. The manager on duty is Lois, who doesn’t know me from Adam.
And she’s watching me like a hawk.
Hence, the pasted smile.
But I need to learn to smile. If I’m going to be waiting tables, a smile goes a long way. I learned that back at the diner. Smiling was hard for me then as well.
It’s even harder for me now.
But it does get easier each time.
Macy said it would, and she hasn’t steered me wrong yet.
During my break, I replay the conversation we had about Leif Ramsey.
“I slept with him, Macy. I slept with Leif Ramsey.”
Macy’s eyes widen, which doesn’t surprise me.
“And he’s your bodyguard?”
“Something like that.”
“He shouldn’t have taken advantage of you like that.”
My instinct is to agree with her. To say Leif took advantage of me, that I regret it.
But that’s a lie. He did everything he could not to take advantage of me. Hell, I offered up the advantage on a silver platter. And I’m not a liar. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not a liar.
Strike hard and strike first has always been my motto, but something about this time with Leif makes me think differently.
“It would be easy to tell you that he took advantage of me, but he didn’t. I was a willing participant, Macy.”
“I see. And this is the first time since the island?”
“It was, and I almost felt like it was kind of a cleansing ritual, if that makes sense.”
She nods. “It does. And you feel cleansed now?”
I think for a moment. Do I? I certainly did at the time. I felt like he was burning all the evil out of me.
And now? I have no regrets, but I know I wasn’t really cleansed.
“Yes and no,” I finally reply.
“Can you explain what you mean by that?”
“Sort of. Yes, meaning that I felt things—rather, my body felt things—I’m not sure I’ve ever felt before.”
“Even before the island?”
“Yes.”
“I see. And what do you mean when you say no?”
“No means that I can be objective about it. I know there’s no such thing as a cleansing ritual. I know I’m the same person—with the same experiences—that I was before Leif and I had sex.”
Macy smiles. “You know, I get reports from the Wolfes.”
“I’m sure you do.”
“You’re so calm and collected during our sessions, Kelly, and your records from the retreat center at the island indicate the same thing, with the exception of when you first got there. But the reports I get from the Wolfes are vastly different.”
I say nothing in reply.
She clears her throat and continues. “They say you’re difficult to deal with. Sometimes downright belligerent. That you fight them on everything.”
I nod. Does she expect me to deny it? Like I said, I’m not a liar.
“Can you tell me why that is?”
“I wish I could tell you,” I say.
“Do you think they want something from you?”