“I’m twenty-six! I’m not TP-ing someone’s house, Care!”
Cara pouts, slumping in her seat. “Baby.” She flips to the next page on her clipboard. “Okay, we’ve settled on a picnic dinner, and telling her you’re rich and famous. Now let’s go over the important stuff.”
“That feels like the important stuff.”
She rolls her eyes. “No, Adam, the important stuff is what you’re going to wear, what you’re going to feed her, alcohol or no alcohol, sex or no sex, chocolate cake for dessert or—”
“Sex?” Heat rushes to my ears and I shake my head. “No sex. It’s a first date. I’m not even going to kiss her!” I look to Jennie and Olivia. “Right? No kiss? Yeah, you don’t kiss on a first date.” I sit back in my seat, relieved when Hank nods in agreement. “Yeah, that’d be moving way too fast. No kiss.” I sit forward. “Or wait. Does it send the wrong message if I don’t kiss her? Will she think I don’t like her? And if I do kiss her, long or quick? With or without tongue? Do I let my hands wander, or do I—” I look down at my clammy hands, wiping them on my shorts before throwing them in the air, giving a little wave “—keep my hands in the air where she can see them, so she knows there won’t be any funny business?”
The basement is silent for a full ten seconds.
Hank clears his throat. “I’ve never wished I could see more in my life than I do right now.”
The girls break out in howling laughter, and even I crack a smile, forcing myself back to the couch.
“I’m just so nervous. I’m never like this before a date.”
“Well, maybe that means something,” Hank says. “For this Rosie to take such a solid, confident guy like you and turn him into a rambling mess…maybe meeting her was fate. And I know you’ve lost some of that confidence when things ended with your last girlfriend, but maybe Rosie will help you get back there. All the best people help us find ourselves when we’re feeling lost.”
I cock my head. “I get it now.”
“Get what?”
“Why they invited you to girls’ night. I don’t even need them, just you.”
“Hey !” Olivia gestures upstairs. “I brought the cute baby you love so much!”
Cara holds a tablet up. “Ollie also brought this.”
I frown. “A tablet?”
“Oh, you sweet fool,” she murmurs, tapping around on the screen. “Basement Speakers will connect me to your surround sound system, right?”
“Yes…”
“Great.” She sets the tablet down as my speakers ping, letting me know a device has been connected. Her smile is extra scary, and unease slithers down my spine.
“What are we—”
“Chapter Twelve. Isabella. My back hits the wall in the dark hallway with a thud, and I gasp at the feel of Grant’s rock-hard erection pressing against my lower stomach. He’s hot, heavy, and big—so damn big I whimper his name when he hikes my leg up, winding it around his waist, thrusting against me. ‘I like when you whimper my name, but you’re going to be screaming it by the time I’m through with you,’ Grant growls. ”
“What the fuck?” I cry out, flinging my arms wide. “What is this?”
“It’s an audiobook,” Cara says simply, checking her nails. “You read, Adam.”
“I read self-help books! Sometimes I read fantasy! I loved Harry Potter when I was a kid—sue me! I-I-I…I don’t read this!”
“You’re not judging Ollie and Hank’s taste in books, are you, Mr. Lockwood?”
Hank waggles his brows. “This was my pick for our book club read last week.”
“It was so good,” Olivia adds, breathless. She fans her face. “Grant is so swoon-worthy.”
“Can confirm.” Jennie peels back the wrapper on a pack of Dunkaroos. “It was mine and Mom’s initiation into the club last week, and it did not disappoint.” She swipes a tiny cookie through some frosting, then pops it in her mouth. “Think of it as research, Adam. You’re losing it over whether to kiss her, and this will help you figure it out. Those first few dates are all about reading each other’s cues and body language.”
“Sometimes you save that first kiss for date two or three,” Olivia adds.
“And sometimes you let the arrogant hockey captain who you swore you’d never touch take you upstairs and plow you right into the next year on his California king,” Cara counters, winking at Olivia.
“He told me Oprah owned the same mattress! How was I supposed to say no?”
“It’s pretty easy,” Jennie says. “No . See? Easy. Try it out with me, pip-squeak. No, Carter, I will not have sex with you. ”
Olivia jabs a finger at me. “This is supposed to be about Adam not knowing how to date, not me being weak and horny!”
“Hey!” I push her threatening finger away. “I was happy for you two when you kissed on New Year’s!” I throw my arms in the air when I realize the couple in the audiobook is naked. “Great, where did their clothes go?”
“They lost them when you all were bickering,” Hank replies.
Isabella and Grant become nothing more than searing kisses, punishing touches, tortured moans that barrel out of my sound system, ensuring the memory will forever be burned into my ears, and when she takes his “thick, throbbing length” in her hand, I drop my head and groan.
“Is this necessary? It’s like I’m listening to porn with my best friends’ wives. You guys are like my sisters. I feel—”
Olivia presses her hand to my mouth. “Shhh. It’s about to get good.”
“He presses two fingers inside my soaking pussy and circles my clit slowly as his mouth moves over my neck. ”
“Jesus Christ. I can’t.” I jump to my feet and rake my fingers down my face. “I can’t do it. Somebody turn it off.” I point at Cara, who’s typing away on her phone. “What are you doing?”
“Just texting Emmett about something I want him to try tonight.”
“Cara—”
“‘Is this how you like to be fucked?’ he asks. ‘Slow and gentle?’ He thrusts his thick fingers harder, faster, and my knees buckle as I clutch his shoulders. ‘Or hard and rough, like this?’ ”
“Ah !” A bloodcurdling shriek sounds from behind me. I look over my shoulder, finding my friends at the bottom of my stairs.
Carter claps his hands over Ireland’s ears, from where she’s clinging to Garrett. “Cover your ears, princess !”
“Take her, take her!” Garrett shouts, shoving Ireland into Carter’s arms.
Jaxon’s hands are glued to his cheeks. “What the fuck are you doing , Adam?” he screams.
Emmett winks at Cara. “Got your text, babe.”
I stomp up the stairs as fast as my legs will take me. “I’m fucking out of here.”
By some miracle, I make it to Wednesday.
I make it through unnecessary toy recommendations from Jennie.
I make it through snippets of helpful scenes from audiobooks sent by Olivia.