“After John died, I knew I had to fix things between Jules and me.” Grandma cast him a guilty look. “I thought if we could have one very honest, very sincere discussion, we could get over our past and start healing.”
“Just one?”
She scrunched her nose. “Silly of me, I know now. But at the time, it made sense. I flew here to do just that, but I’d taken this stupid pill to help with my flying anxiety and it made me wonky.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Explain ‘wonky.’ ”
She lifted a finger and made a circle at her temple. “I was out of it. I hadn’t had more than two hours’ sleep a night in the weeks before, which made it worse. Oh, and no lunch that day either, or breakfast. By the time I arrived on your mom’s doorstep, I was exhausted and couldn’t speak right and— Oh, Gray.” Grandma propped her elbows on the table and pressed her hands over her eyes. “It was awful. I thought I was saying one thing, but apparently, I was saying something else. By the time it was over, your mother thought I came here to tell her I was dying.”
Gray blinked. “Dying? She told me you were ill, not dying.”
“Yes, well, she thinks I’m dying.”
There was Mom, shielding him from bad news. As usual, darn it. The kettle began to whistle. He turned off the burner, poured the steaming water into a mug, and dropped in a tea bag from the canister. He carried the mug back to the table and sat back down. “Let me get this straight. You accidentally told Mom you were dying—”
“I never said it! She thought that was what I said.”
“If she still thinks it, that means you never told her that she’d misunderstood you.”
Grandma clapped both hands over her cheeks. “I know, I know,” she groaned. “I was going to, but she was so nice.”
“She was so nice,” he repeated blankly.
Grandma leaned forward, her expression earnest and a little amazed. “Have you seen how she treats me now? She talks to me—really talks, and not just polite, chilly nonsense. And she’s been sitting with me, fixing me dinner, acting as if she cares, sharing her thoughts and… it’s been wonderful. It’s the first time she’s been that open with me.”
Gray pulled his tea closer and tried not to roll his eyes. Now he really, really regretted letting his grandma confide in him. “So… Mom thinks you’re dying, but you’re not correcting her because you like that she thinks you’re dying.”
Grandma nodded, looking miserable. “I should tell her the truth.”
“And soon.”
“I know. But you don’t know how wonderful it’s been. I can’t just give that up. We’re getting close and… who knows? She may even tell me about her secret boyfriend.”
Good Lord, what a mess. Gray took a slow drink of the tea and then put the mug back on the table in front of him. He didn’t know what Ava put in the tea she made for him, but it always left him calmer, more peaceful. Heaven knew he needed it right now. “I hate to tell you this, but Mark and I think Mom broke up with Joe.”
Grandma stiffened. “When?”
“I’m not sure. We think it happened after the July Fourth parade. She was in a bad mood that day.” He thought about it. “Pretty much every day since, too. Whenever it was, he’s stopped coming by the Moonlight. We rarely see him now.”
Grandma couldn’t have looked more disappointed. “Well, darn. I was looking forward to that discussion.” She was quiet a minute, but suddenly brightened. “Maybe she’ll tell me why they broke up.”
“I doubt it. Mark tried to get her to talk about it, but she shut him down hard.”
Grandma didn’t look impressed.
Gray repeated, “Hard. As only Mom can do.”
“But she’s never told me about it. Not once.”
“Or me or Mark either. Not that it matters, though. The only secret I wish I didn’t know is yours.”
“I had to tell someone.” She reclaimed her coffee, eyeing him over the top of her mug. “To be honest, I’m sort of lonely. Jules thinks I’m sick, so I can’t go anywhere. I’m trapped here, and now she’s trying to get me to eat all of this horrible food…. Gray, I’m in prison. One I made for myself.”
“You deserve to be in that prison and forced to eat nothing but whole wheat and low-fat dairy.”
“I know it’s my fault. I promise I’ll tell her the truth… eventually. I’ll have to.” Her gaze met his, beseeching. “But for now, please keep this between us. I’m not yet ready to deal with it, and we’re getting closer every day. I can’t just let that go. Not yet, anyway.”
He held up his hands. “I’m not getting involved. I can promise you that.”
“Thank you,” she said meekly.
As if. “Just tell me one thing. How do you see this ending? Because I can only think of one way, and it will be ugly.”
“She’ll be upset, but I’m hoping that by then she’ll understand me better and know I’d never do anything to hurt her, not on purpose. Plus, I didn’t lie to her. I’m just utilizing the outcome of a simple misunderstanding.”
Gray didn’t answer. He didn’t have to, because Grandma knew her sauce was weak.
She fidgeted with her mug. “It hasn’t been easy, Gray. Since I divorced her dad, she’s looked at me as if I were the worst person in the world. No matter what I did, or how I did it, she has viewed it through that lens, and I was never again good enough. But this time, because she thinks our time is limited, that’s all changed. So yes, I went with it. I’ve even tried to look sick, too. You probably didn’t notice, but I’ve almost stopped wearing makeup.”
Lord preserve him from women with large personalities. “You do look pale.”
“Like a ghost.” She pressed a hand to her cheek. “I feel naked without my Chanel Vitalumière foundation. And don’t get me started about my lack of eyeliner or the mess my hair has become. Ugh! But I want it to look genuine, so… every once in a while, I pretend to be unsteady when I walk, and I’ve been keeping my voice weak when I talk so—”
He burst into laughter. When she glared at him, he raised a hand. “Sorry. That’s a lot of pretending.”
Humor lit her eyes unexpectedly. “You’re not helping.”
“I don’t think anyone can,” he said truthfully. He took a drink of his tea and considered everything she’d told him. “This won’t end well. Any progress you and Mom make is going to disappear once she realizes what you’ve been doing.”
“Yes, well, I might have a solution. It came to me this morning, so I haven’t worked out the kinks yet, but…” Her gaze dropped to the table, and she traced a little circle on the surface with her finger. “I was thinking that maybe instead of telling Jules that she misunderstood what I was saying about death and whatnot… once we’ve grown closer as a family… I could just pretend I got better. Sort of… miraculously.”
“Oh my God. You want to solve your lie with another lie.”
“It could work,” she said stiffly.