Maybe she was a lot of work, too, in a different way. Certainly, if he started something with her, she wasn’t going to make shit easy on him. The way they’d left things, Duncan supposed his task now was to figure out if he wanted her to make shit hard on him.
Monty turned back to the bar. “Peaches, my brother, do all the girls in California look like the girls here? Is it the sunshine, you think?”
Peaches chuckled. “We got ugly girls, too. But I know what you mean. When I first got out here, I thought the same thing. I think it’s ‘cuz they all work out, and they don’t cover up so much out here.”
A different pretty blonde, also in something sparkly, sidled in beside Duncan and scanned his kutte. “Hi, Duncan. I’m Fawn.”
“Hi, Fawn,” Duncan said.
She put a shiny red mouth around a straw and sucked up the last of her drink. “Buy me another?” she asked as she set the glass on the bar.
Duncan glanced at Peaches. “You’re charging?”
“No,” Peaches answered. At the same time, Monty slapped him upside the head. Oh, right. A little game.
“Get the lady another on me,” he said—and immediately felt a kick of guilt.
But hold up. Why should he feel guilty? He and Phoebe weren’t together. She’d said it herself: they weren’t in the same place. In fact, she wanted him to figure his shit out, right? She wasn’t going wait around for him to do it, because they weren’t together.
He’d known her for a week. One freaking week. They’d been together two nights.
So why the fuck should he feel guilty now?
He should not.
In fact, he should be figuring out what he wanted, right? Right. Okay then.
He hooked his arm around Fawn’s slim waist. “There somewhere private in this place?”
She picked up her fresh drink and smiled at him. “Sure. I’ll show you.”
As he stood, he asked, “How’d you feel about asking one of your friends to come along?”
~oOo~
“What crawled up your ass and dug a hole?” Jay asked as he leaned on the fence beside Duncan. “You’ve been mopey all morning.”
The Bulls had stopped for food and gas near a town called Santa Maria. Ocean to the left, vineyards to the right. Most of the Bulls were still sprawled in chairs on the patio of the little Mexican place where they’d just had lunch. But Duncan had been moody and restless since he’d woken up naked in a strange bed buried under two naked girls whose names he couldn’t remember. After his lunch, he’d gotten up to walk it off, and he’d wound up here, leaning on a bit of split-rail fence behind the restaurant, at the edge of a cliff, watching the ocean below.
Today was one of the longest days of the run, from Madrone west to the coast, then up the Pacific Coast Highway to Monterey. More than four hundred miles, almost all of it on a two-lane road.
But what a two-lane road. Duncan had seen the Atlantic Ocean twice, on family vacations to Florida, and he’d thought it was cool. But the Pacific Ocean, and the California coast, laid him out. So dramatic. So fucking beautiful. Even in his, yes, mopey mood, Duncan was dazzled by the view. Once the desert was behind them, California sparkled. It was the most beautiful state he’d ever seen.
“Just tired, I guess,” he told Jay. “Didn’t sleep great.”
Jay laughed. “I guess not. Sounded like California girls are extra energetic.”
Duncan looked away, returning his focus to the ocean. He felt like shit today.
Actually, he felt guilty as shit today.
It was so stupid. He owed Phoebe nothing—and that wasn’t just him trying to twist things around to make a case to her that he hadn’t cheated last night. She herself had made it clear that he owed her nothing. Yet his first thought upon waking and seeing himself tangled up with two SoCal sweetbutts had been that he’d fucked up.
Having the option to fuck whom he wanted when he wanted was the life he’d chosen. He hadn’t pretended otherwise with Phoebe, and she hadn’t made any commitments to him, either. So why the fuck did he feel practically sick with guilt?
“Seriously, Dunc,” Jay said, setting his hand on Duncan’s back. “What’s up?”
Duncan shrugged him off. “Nothing. Fuck off.”
Jay shoved away from the fence. “Okay, buzzkill. I’m gonna go back and get some churros. You wanna talk, let me know. Otherwise, mope away.” He turned and strolled back to the restaurant.
Duncan stood where he was, watching the waves wash up against the rocks below, and examined what was going on inside him. He’d been in his head all morning, so he pretty much understood already: it didn’t matter that she didn’t care whom he slept with, he still felt disloyal. Which meant he liked Phoebe a lot. Enough to change his life to be with her.
But, again, one fucking week. It seemed crazy to even consider changing his life for a girl he barely knew. And what if she was back in Oklahoma, deciding that she wasn’t interested, regardless? It had been only a week for her, too. Maybe she didn’t want to change her life, either. Maybe she was a lot less conflicted about it than he was.
Fuck, what if he went back and said he’d decided he wanted to try to make something with her, and she told him, nah, no thanks? What a fucking simp he’d be then!
A familiar hand settled on his shoulder, and Duncan jumped. He hadn’t heard his father come up.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Son. We’re getting ready to ride out. You ready?”
Duncan inhaled slowly and pulled himself out of his thoughts. “Yeah.”
As he pushed away from the fence, Dad caught his arm. “Hey. You want to talk? We can take a few minutes.”
He nearly deflected and moved to return to the restaurant, but his dad was looking at him so intently, Duncan ended up asking, “Can I ask a personal question?”
“Sure.” Dad leaned back against the fence and settled in. “Hit me.”
“How did you know Mom was who you wanted to be with forever?”
For a second, Dad regarded him quietly. Then a smile emerged and grew. “Are you thinking about the truck girl?”
“Her name is Phoebe, Dad.”
“Sorry. Phoebe. So yes, you are.” When Duncan acknowledged the truth with a nod and a shrug, Dad continued, “Well, you know the story about how Mom and I met.”
That was one of those stories his parents told at every opportunity. “In Walmart. She helped you pick out a purse for Cissy.” Cecily had been a little girl back then; Dad had always had an extra soft spot for her.
“Right. Your mom was this beautiful, sweet girl, with a little bit of sass under the sweet. I liked her right off and got her number before I left the parking lot. I don’t know exactly when I decided I wanted her forever, though. I just wanted her then, and I kept wanting her, and then I wanted her forever.” Wearing a nostalgic smile, he turned to face the ocean. “I guess if there was a moment when I knew it for sure, it was when she told me she was pregnant with Kelse. We’d only been together a couple months then. But I knew. And it wasn’t just responsibility for the baby, or anything like that. I knew I wanted your mom. I’d wanted a family my whole life, and that was when I knew I wanted to make that family with her.”