A sharp gust of frosty wind kicked up right then, sending ancient leaves swirling up from the porch floor and blowing the loose strands of Phoebe’s hair back. She shivered and closed the door a little, so its opening wasn’t much wider than her shoulders.
Cold and anxious, beginning to feel impatient, Duncan almost stepped up onto the threshold, ready to suggest they continue this inside, but, again, he throttled the urge.
“I don’t know if I can explain how bad that felt, Duncan,” Phoebe said. “You betrayed my trust, and you made me feel small and weak. And you did it while I was meeting your family for the first time. That’s their first impression of me.”
“If it helps, they were all really impressed by you, and every one of them is Team Phoebe right now.” Rather than step in uninvited, Duncan offered his hand, palm up. “I am very sorry, and I will try never to do anything like it again.”
She’d focused on his hand, but now her eyes snapped up to his. “You’ll try?”
He smiled a little. “Well, obviously I’m deeply flawed. Feels fake and cheap to swear I won’t ever fuck up again.”
Phoebe turned her attention again to his outstretched hand. She set hers on it.
When he closed his fingers around her hand, she stepped back and pushed the door open. “You can come in.”
Relief flooding his veins and making his limbs tingle, Duncan went into Phoebe’s home.
Though it wasn’t that late, not even eleven o’clock, the house was dim and quiet. The living room was dark, and only the glow of the light over the sink illuminated the kitchen. He caught the soft sounds of a television coming from the back of the house, where Vin’s room was.
He turned back as she closed the door. “I know we need to talk, and I want to, but right now, I really just want to hold you for a minute.”
She leaned back on the door and shook her head. “We don’t need to talk about it anymore. I forgive you, and I don’t want to dissect it over and over again. It seems like you get it.”
“I do, and I’m sorry.”
“I know.” She took his hand again. “You can stop apologizing now. I don’t need more.”
“I think I’m falling in love with you,” he said—and then could have torn his stupid mouth clean off his face.
Holy shit, what was he doing?! It was like he’d been sitting on so many words trying to apologize properly that the second he relaxed a bunch came rushing up to the top—and not the words he’d been wrestling with all this time. Not any attempted explanations for his fuckup. Instead, something much, much worse.
It wasn’t a lie, but fuck, he wasn’t ready to put that out in the world—and she couldn’t possibly be ready for it to be out. He’d just fucked up, and now he was dropping love bombs? She’d think he was trying to manipulate her again.
“I don’t know what to say to that,” she said.
Not words a guy who’d just dropped the L-word for the first time in his life wanted to hear, but certainly words that fit the situation.
“I know. I’m sorry. I don’t know why those words came out. I promise I don’t mean some kind of ... I don’t know, emotional blackmail. I just ... my head’s so loud tonight. It’s like a demonic rave in here.”
“Are you saying they’re not true?”
Duncan frowned. Did she want him to fall in love with her? Or had she discovered something that could humiliate him and get some revenge for what he’d done?
No. Phoebe wasn’t a game-player. And neither was he.
“They’re true. But they were too early.”
“Yes, they were.” She stepped to him and looked up to meet his eyes. “But when I said I trusted you, and I don’t trust easily, I was saying something similar. That’s why tonight hurt so much.”
Duncan didn’t know how to understand the sensation coursing through his body, like someone had shoved a Roman candle in his chest, and it was going off in all directions. It hurt, but it felt great, too.
He finally put his hands on her, sliding his fingers into her hair. “I don’t ever want to hurt you again,” he murmured.
She smiled, bright and sweet. Her hands came up, slid over his shoulders and around his neck.
Duncan bent low and kissed her, and all his doubts and worries sloughed from his back. He didn’t know why Phoebe had changed so much about what he wanted in his life, but he knew the changes were right. When he had her in his arms like this, he could feel that it was right.
She wrapped herself more tightly around him and whispered, “Let’s go upstairs,” against his lips.
He gathered her into his hands and lifted her up. She slung her legs around his hips.
Still kissing her, Duncan turned and made his way to the stairs.
CHAPTER TWENTY
“This is damn good, Dunc,” Vin said as he shoveled into his mouth the last of his serving of Duncan’s breakfast casserole.
“It really is,” said Margot, “and if you start cooking all the time like this, I might actually get an ass. With all this cheese and potatoes, there’s got to be like two hundred calories in each bite.”
Grinning, his cheeks pinked with pride, Duncan shrugged. “Aren’t you the one that did ten minutes the other night on how stupid counting calories is?”
Margot shrugged back. “I’m not counting, just observing.”
Duncan turned to Phoebe. “What do you think, babe?”
For almost a month now, Duncan had spent so much time at the ranch he was practically a resident. Pretty much the only nights he didn’t spend here were after he’d worked the last shift at the station, or was doing some kind of work for the Bulls that either had him working late or had him out of town. This morning, a Saturday bright and fresh with coming spring, he had to be at the station at ten, but he’d woken with a crazy amount of energy and high spirits and announced that he was going to make breakfast.
He'd insisted several times that he knew how to cook, but this was the first evidence. And it was as good as Vin and Margot declared. Eggs, sausage, cheese, hash browns, and enough spices that even Vin was satisfied. It would be on nobody’s heart-healthy or weight-loss plan, but that was why it was so good.
Phoebe slipped a cheesy forkful into her mouth and chewed. “I think my guy is the complete package.”
“Damn straight.” He leaned over and kissed her.
“Gross! Get a room!” Margot teased.
It was more than the new burst of spring weather that had them all in a good mood this morning: they’d also gotten some good news. The GoFundMe and other fundraising efforts had raised over eighty-thousand dollars, and they’d been able to pay for all the animals to get checked over by the state-appointed vet, and get the road graded, and repair and seal the corral fence. But the good news they’d gotten this morning was the best news: Duncan’s father had given them the name of a roofer with ties to the Brazen Bulls. Toby Keller was going to do the roof at a discount as a favor to Maverick (and Duncan), and he’d agreed to start the job with fifty-percent down and work out a payment plan for the balance.
That was the kind of help Phoebe could feel comfortable taking from the Bulls—with the bonus of making Duncan happy by letting him be involved.