Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction
that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense,
regardless of how it turns out.
- Vaclav Havel
Chapter 41
Courtney eagerly relayed the conversation. She couldn’t wait to tell Claire everything Tony said. His excuse for visiting was to personally discuss the press release. Courtney promised she and Brent did their best to appear astonished and shocked by his change in attitude.
Brent reminded Tony about his threatened civil suit. Courtney even cried remembering her visit to the jail and inability to help. She said Tony claimed his outlook changed after seeing and speaking with Claire in person. He claimed his earlier anger was a form of self-preservation. He didn’t want to admit having feelings for the woman he’d been led to believe attempted to kill him. He told his friends he wasn’t sure where this reconnection was headed, but he hoped for full reunification.
Then according to Courtney, he apologized for his previous behavior and announced he wanted to bring Claire to Caleb’s wedding. Courtney said she almost lost it. She’d wanted to get Claire to the wedding for so long. Now with the possibility before her, she told Tony it wasn’t up to him, it was up to Julia and Caleb. Courtney didn’t want her son’s wedding to be a media circus, like the gala.
Graciously, Tony offered assistance with security and promised discreet behavior. They called Caleb and Julia. Courtney said Julia always liked Claire and was respectfully supportive of Tony’s choice of guest.
Claire listened in total disbelief. The wedding was in less than a week. She wasn’t supposed to see Tony again for two weeks. Nonetheless, she truly wanted to attend the wedding. As they spoke Claire thought about the trip she took with Courtney to Texas. For some reason she remembered her period was right before that trip. At the time she was relieved it occurred before frolicking in the sun and surf.
At that second, while Courtney rambled on enthusiastically about the wedding... Claire realized she hadn’t had her menstrual cycle since.
When Courtney paused, Claire asked, “How long ago did we go to Texas?”
“I’m not sure. Things have been so busy. I just know I can’t wait to see you again.” Perhaps hearing Claire’s recent change in tone, Courtney added, “But, you do what you feel is right. If you don’t want to be here with him, don’t do it. We can get together again after the wedding.”
Claire’s mind tried to process -- they went to Texas in the middle of April. And now it’s almost June. She and Harry first got together in San Diego. When was that? How effective are condoms? How soon does morning sickness start? Those questions and more bombarded her mind as she tried to maintain her conversation, “I want to see you too.” Claire managed weakly, “It’ll be hard to act like we haven’t been in contact.”
“Well, don’t worry about that. Just decide what you’re going to do.”
Before Claire could answer her iPhone rang. It was the third call from Tony. “I need to go; he’s calling again. I can’t avoid his calls all day.”
“Love you, Honey. Tell me what you decide, or maybe Tony should. That way I’ll react honestly.”
“Got to go, bye.” Claire disconnected her work phone and answered the iPhone.
Tony’s call added to Claire’s already fried emotions. Besides working things out with Harry and Amber, she’d just learned Tony was going to ask her to the Simmons’ wedding in five days, and she’d realized at the very least, her period was three weeks late. Needless to say, she didn’t need to feign anxiety; it was real. “Tony, this is the third time you’ve called this morning. We aren’t making any public appearances for two weeks. Please give me some space.”
“Hello, Claire, so nice to hear your pleasant tone.”
“I’ve got a lot going on. What do you want?”
“Let me say, I would call less frequently if you would answer your phone.” She didn’t respond. He continued, “I made plans for us, for this coming weekend.”
Despite the upheaval in her life, she attempted to conceal the smile from her voice, not wanting the emerging expression to reveal her eagerness to attend the wedding. The mixture of emotions caused her voice to crack; hopefully it came across as irritation, “I agreed to go to Chicago, in two weeks. I’m not going anywhere with you next weekend.”
“I believe I might be able to persuade you otherwise.”
“Is that a threat? What are you going to do this time, arrange a walk-out of SiJo’s employees?”
“No, Claire. No threats – I believe you’ll want to attend this function.”
Exasperation evident, she replied, “Why? What function would I possibly want to attend with you?”
“Caleb and Julia’s wedding.”
Claire gasped. It was unbelievable. Even after Courtney’s call, Claire never truly believed she’d have this opportunity. “But, but... all of your friends think I tried to kill you.”
“The news release says differently.”
“That doesn’t mean they’ve changed their opinion of me. They probably don’t want me there.” As they continued to speak, Tony convinced Claire her presence was welcomed. She agreed to fly commercial to Iowa City, arriving Thursday afternoon. He wanted the chance for her to meet with his friends before the wedding, which was Saturday.
Claire’s agreement contained a few stipulations: She wanted a pre-purchased return ticket for Sunday. Tony agreed.
The next confrontation came when discussing accommodations. Tony wanted her to stay at the estate. Claire’s initial response was no. Reinforcing her stance, she exclaimed, “This idea is undebatable.”
Then Claire thought about Catherine. “The news release said you let some longtime members of your staff go. I know you still have Eric. Is Catherine still at the estate?”
“She is. And she’s hoping you will stay here.”
Claire exhaled, “My room will need a lock.”
“That isn’t a problem.”
His answer made her bristle. “It needs to be a lock that operates from the inside.” She clarified, “Also I will keep my phone at all times and have access to your Wi-Fi.”
He chuckled, “You drive a hard bargain. I told you before you should go into business. You are a master negotiator.”
Claire remembered Harry’s words: When it comes to Mr. Rawlings, your negotiating skills are stellar! My guess is that you’ll leave your little meeting and move back to Iowa. She wasn’t moving. This was just a visit.
As soon as she hung up with Tony, Claire went to the store and bought a home pregnancy kit. Sitting at her dressing table and waiting for the results, the memories of her phone calls filtrated her thoughts. She wanted to go to Caleb’s wedding. However, the results of this test could make everything different.
Claire stared at the white plastic stick and waited for the timer to sound on her iPhone. Did she really need this little piece of plastic to tell her what she already knew? She was experiencing all the symptoms: nausea - more intense in the morning, hunger – all the time and tiredness – even after napping, and thirst – unquenchable at times. Looking at the two small openings within the stick, Claire saw lines begin to form. The directions said: results in three minutes. It had been less than one, and the vertical blue line in the control window appeared before her eyes, indicating the test was working.