“When it comes to you, I don’t know what I’m doing.” The statement is one I’ve heard from him before, and I wonder where he’s going with this. “For a man like me, who’s in control of every aspect of his life, you have sent my life into a tailspin. I don’t know up from down. I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. I’m always worried about you, thinking about you, hoping you’re sleeping and eating, that you’re safe and happy.”
I want to smile, because I can see he’s annoyed with his own feelings and really doesn’t know how to deal with them. “So… you’re mad at me?”
His brows drag together and his lips turn down at that question. “Mad at you? No. I’m pissed at myself, because I keep doing things that I know will piss you off, but I can’t help it, because at the end of the day, I want to reassure myself that you’re okay.”
“And what is it you think will happen to me if you don’t have control when it comes to me?”
“I don’t know.” He rests his hands on the counter and his knuckles turn white, like he doesn’t like the things his mind comes up with.
“Do you understand that all it does when you overstep is push me away and make me want to rebel?”
“I’m learning that,” he grumbles, not sounding happy about that either.
I get up off my stool and walk around the kitchen to him, and he turns toward me once I’m close. I place my hands on his chest and lean into him. “I don’t want to be controlled, Braxton. That might be something I’m okay with in the bedroom, but when it comes to life, I don’t want someone telling me what to do. I want a partner. I want a man who will listen to what I want and need, someone to share things with.”
“You can share things with me.” He settles his hands on my waist and drags me against him.
“Can I?” I shake my head, trying not to become frustrated, because so far he’s proven I can’t. “You sent my brother to come to the coffee shop where I was meeting Troy, and that was something I didn’t even tell you about.” I feel his hands wrap tight into my shirt at my sides and watch his face get hard.
“He cheated on you. You don’t need to be alone with him.”
“I was in a public place, and I was meeting him to get my stuff—not for a date or to talk about us getting back together. And again, I never told you I was meeting him. You found out, because you used information I didn’t give you.” His jaw tics, and I know I’ve proven my point. Thank God, maybe we can actually get somewhere this time.
“Why didn’t you tell me about meeting up with him?”
Okay, maybe not. “Because I knew that if I did, there would be drama, and I was over dealing with drama.”
“You didn’t tell Jamie either,” he says like he’s just made his point, when he most definitely has not.
“Yeah, because I know my brother, and like you, he would make the situation more complicated and uncomfortable than it needed to be, which he did when he showed up.”
“I’m not going to apologize for that,” he states, lifting me up onto the counter and forcing his way between my knees. “Jamie told me he didn’t even have your stuff, that he left it in his car, which I’m sure was a move he made in order to get more time with you.”
“Do you think I don’t know that?” I roll my eyes and push on his chest. “I’m not stupid or helpless, Braxton. I know how to take care of myself.”
“I never said you were stupid or helpless, but if I can do something to reassure myself that you’re okay, I’m going to do it, and I won’t apologize afterward.”
“You did apologize,” I remind him. “You sent me a note that said you were sorry.
“Sorry about you being upset. Sorry I’m so fucking obsessed with you that I will go to whatever lengths to get even the smallest piece of information about you. Sorry that I want you to myself and wish I could lock you away until you became as obsessed with me as I am with you.”
“You do know that just being you—not the crazy you, but the sweet, funny, and adorably frustrating you—is doing that, right? You don’t have to be so extreme.”
He lowers his head and kisses my neck. “I can try.”
“Try?” I ask, and he pulls back to meet my gaze.
He rests his forehead against mine. “I think I told you before, baby. I don’t want to lie to you anymore, and I know telling you what you want to hear would be a lie. All I can do is promise I’ll try to loosen up a bit.”
I close my eyes and slide my hands up his chest, around the back of his neck, and through his hair, cupping the back of his head.
“Okay.” I lean up, and he closes the distance, touching his lips to mine. “I want this to work, Braxton. I want this crazy, intense thing between us to work just as much as you do.”
“Good.” He slides his hands around my hips and down to cup my ass, and then he lifts me off the counter.
“Where are we going?”
“I need to be inside you.” He kisses up my throat to my neck as I wrap my legs around his hips.
I hold tight to him as he carries me across the room then moan as he covers my mouth with his and lays me on the couch. And as we devour each other, I try to make him understand with every touch, lick, kiss, and sound that he’s already got me, that I’m already obsessed with him.
________________
With a fire burning in the fireplace casting a glow around the room, I lay with my head on Braxton’s bare chest, my fingers smoothing over his side, his traveling idly up and down my back. I close my eyes.
It’s Saturday night, and tomorrow morning, we’re supposed to go back to the city, something I wish we didn’t have to do. It’s been a good day, one in which the outside world hasn’t had a chance to interfere, where we’ve just been able to be us.
“I really wish we didn’t have to go back tomorrow,” I whisper into the quiet.
“I know.” His lips rest against the top of my head. “If my parents weren’t coming into town, we could spend another night and leave Monday morning, but we can come back next weekend if you want.”
I tilt my head back to look at him. “Maybe you can show me more than the bedroom, the couch, and kitchen next time we’re here.” I grin. “I didn’t even get to see your shop.”
“Are you complaining about how you spent your day?” He rolls me to my back and settles between my legs.
“No.” I smile, sliding my fingers through his hair, and lift up to touch my mouth to his. Just when the kiss starts to get hot, his phone rings, making me sigh.
“Sorry.”
“It’s not easy being the boss,” I grumble, thinking next time we’re here I’ll lock his phone in his glove box where he can’t hear it.
He smirks and touches his mouth to mine. “Be right back.”
I get up on my elbow and watch him walk to the kitchen then decide now is as good of a time as any to go use the restroom. I stand, pick up my T-shirt, and put it on before padding to the bathroom. After I finish, I step out and frown when I don’t see him in the kitchen on his phone, where he’s taken most of his calls today.