I now plopped down as far away from him as I could. Enough of that nonsense, Sylvie. Out of sheer nervousness, I started humming as I poured tea for us from the thermos. I smiled when I found the cloth napkins, folded into perfect pinwheels. “Ah, you have used that ax more often. This is the work of an expert. I forgot you were the child of restaurant owners. I don’t remember how to do this anymore.”
“I spent many hours helping out there, while they were still hoping I would take over the restaurant.”
I finally dared to look at him again. He was sitting up now, thank goodness. “Were they disappointed?”
“Very.” His lips flattened. He imitated his mother. “‘What nonsense, following your dreams. Survive. Make a living. Eat.’ Except I think Pa understands. He is just afraid to speak up.” Willem had been a mathematics teacher in China. His was the brilliant mind behind the success of the restaurant, balancing the input and output of goods and staff, knowing exactly when they had to hunker down and when they should diversify. When he had helped me with my homework, we would fly through the problems together, leapfrogging to the answer while Lukas was left to puzzle it out line by line. Still, the debt Willem owed Helena for releasing him from China’s grip was one he would never be able to repay.
There was an awkward pause. I filled it with my senseless humming again, and Lukas said, “You have a nice voice.”
“You should hear my little sister, Amy.” I passed him a Brie sandwich on dark seed-mix bread and took one for myself. “If she hears a song on the radio, she can pick it out on her guitar or keyboard. And her voice, so rich and evocative, I would sometimes lean against the outside of the bathroom door while she was taking a shower, just to listen.”
“She sounds pretty great.” To my surprise, his eyebrows had furrowed into one thick line. Was that sarcasm in his voice?
I said defensively, “She is. There was never enough money or time to train her talent. I was not old enough to help her then.”
He leaned over and laid his large palm over my knee. I could feel the warmth of it through my slacks. “What about you, Sylvie? Who was there for you?”
I shifted so his hand fell from me, then tore off a bit of my bread and pitched it into the water for the ducks. One dove for it, quacking wildly, while the rest fled. “I have always been fine, Lukas. Do not fuss.”
“I think you should take a break, Sylvie. You cannot eat for tomorrow. Enjoy yourself while you are here and maybe find something relaxing to keep yourself occupied. Nothing productive or educational.” He took a bite of his sandwich.
I tossed another piece of bread at the clueless ducks. They had gathered close again. This time, they all scattered. “But I am here for Grandma.”
“You cannot be with her the entire day. Do you know who Estelle and I just had a beer with the other day? You should eat your sandwich.”
Estelle. Of course, that was where he had been. I shook my head and wrapped my arms around my knees, suddenly weary. “I am not hungry.”
“Filip. Do you remember him? He was in our class.”
I cast my mind back and found a vague image of a small, dark-haired kid. “Yes, he always played the violin or something in the Christmas shows?”
Lukas shuffled to sit beside me and took my sandwich from my hands. “That is him. He is a professional cellist now with the Netherlands Philharmonic Orchestra. We became good friends after you left. He gives private lessons on his living-boat in Amsterdam. You could try it.” He held the bread up to my lips. “Stop giving to others. Leave something for yourself. Take a bite.”
I obeyed, then took the sandwich and blinked slowly at him as I chewed. He was suddenly very close. I swallowed. “Where on earth would I get a cello?”
His eyes were on my mouth. “I think most of his students rent one.”
Self-conscious, I turned away, brushing my lips. Did I have crumbs on my face? “But I am not musical at all. Amy is the—”
Now he drew back as well and sighed. “I know it, you have said it. But that is precisely the point. Go and try something you have not done before. You never know where it will lead you.”
Chapter 14
Amy
Friday, May 6
After the dispiriting talk with the police and the Tan family, I return to my room in the attic and call home to update my parents. Then I pace. Willem and Helena have left for work at their restaurant. I could lie to myself but the truth is that no one here knows Sylvie the way I do. Sylvie would never willingly disappear like this without a word, despite Helena’s hints that she stole Grandma’s jewelry and ran off, despite Lukas’s conviction that she’s just taking some time for herself. I remove my glasses and rub them against my shirt. I consider my image reflected in the lenses. Who are you going to be, Amy Lee? A useless, shy little sister? Or are you going to step up to the plate for Sylvie? Because, clearly, no one else is going to do it, not even the police.
I stand up straighter, go into the bathroom, and put in my contact lenses. It’s a surprise to see my face without the protective glasses: all that exposed skin, stretched tight over my bones, vulnerable but stronger too. There’s a fierceness to my mouth I’ve never noticed before. I look through my dormer window in time to see Lukas wheel a large black bicycle out of the smaller, garage-like house. That must be where he lives. He’s my best chance at finding out what happened to Sylvie while she was here. He is not getting away from me today.
I hurtle down the stairs and fling open the front door, panting. “Hey, Lukas! Where are you going?”
He stops in surprise. “I am meeting Estelle in the center.”
“Oh, d-do you mind if I come along?” I am pulling on my thin jacket and stick my feet into my shoes while I hold the front door open with my hip.
To my surprise, he waits patiently for me to come outside. “Okay. I should show you around anyway.” Then he leans his bike against the house and leads me back to his cottage. “Thank you, by the way.”
“For what?” I will never understand this man.
“For defending Sylvie.” He peers at me from beneath his long lashes. For the first time, he truly smiles at me. It lights up his entire face and he becomes so handsome, I catch my breath. “I am sorry I was not very friendly. I am extremely worried about Sylvie and Estelle says I tend to act like an angry bear most of the time anyway. You know, Sylvie is always talking about you.”
“Really?”
“‘Amy is so smart, Amy is so kind. Amy can sing the birds from the trees. With her glasses, Amy has this funny habit of—’”
I don’t recognize this version of myself. “Habit of doing what?”
He laughs softly to himself. “Nothing. So this is where I live.”
“Do you like it here?”
“Well, I rent this place from my family and it is easy, because they take care of Couscous and watch the apartment while I am gone. I tend to be abroad more than I am in this country. But I am saving for my own workplace and house. That is my great hope.”
Lukas unlocks his front door. He doesn’t invite me in but I stick my head in anyway. It’s not a living room, like I’d expected, but rather a large photo studio and storage space, filled with reflective umbrellas, tripods, and light stands.