We all stand when Mindy arrives in a big pink marshmallow dress. It’s insanely over the top, but she looks so happy as she walks down the aisle, simultaneously grinning and weeping like a lunatic, so I love it too.
She takes her place in front of Patrick, and I get a good look at her. Holy moly. This woman is stunning. Go, Patrick.
Weddings always end up doing something weird to me. I feel myself getting emotional when their friends read special poems, and the minister reflects on their commitment. I get choked up during their vows. I take the Kleenex offered by Elaine and dab at the corners of my eyes. I watch with suspense as the ring is slid onto each finger, and sigh with relief when they fit perfectly and go on with ease.
And when the magic words you may now kiss the bride are uttered I let out a happy sigh like I’ve seen THE END scrolled over the top of this perfect movie freeze-frame.
I look at Elaine and we both let out identical delighted laughs and begin clapping. The men on either side of us sigh indulgently.
They walk out down the aisle wearing their brand-new gold rings, and everyone stands up, talking and exclaiming until the strains of the ancient organ are almost drowned out. For the first time, I notice some speculative glances at Josh. What gives?
“They go for photographs down on the boardwalk. I hope the wind doesn’t blow Mindy clean away,”
Elaine tells me, waving politely to someone. “We’ll all go to the hotel now, have some drinks, then an early dinner and speeches. We’ll borrow Josh for some family photos at some point.”
“Sounds good. Right, Josh?” I squeeze his hand. He’s been vacant for the last few minutes. With a jolt, he drops back into his body.
“Sure. Let’s go.”
I throw a look over my shoulder to his parents, which hopefully looks bemused rather than alarmed as I’m hooked into his right arm and swept out of the church.
“Slow down. Josh. Wait. My shoes.” I’m barely able to keep up. He slides down horizontal in the passenger seat and lets out a groaning sigh.
I’m having trouble trying to time my reverse. Everyone is piling out of the parking lot simultaneously.
“Do you want to go straight back? Or do you want me to drive around for a bit?”
“Drive around. All the way back home. Take the highway.”
“I am an independent observer. I assure you, it went pretty well.”
“You’re right, I guess,” he says heavily.
“Pardon? Could you possibly repeat that in a moment, so I can record it? I want it as my text message alert noise. Lucy Hutton, you’re right.”
Teasing him will get him out of his little funk. He looks at me.
“I could do the voice mail message too if you want. You’ve reached the voice mail of Lucy Hutton.
She’s too busy crying at a stranger’s wedding to take your call right now, but leave a message.”
“Oh, shut up. I must watch too many movies. It was so romantic.”
“You’re kinda cute.”
“Joshua Templeman thinks I’m kind of cute. Hell has officially frozen over.” We grin at each other.
“You must have cried for a reason. You’re dreaming of your own wedding?”
I look at him defensively. “No. Of course not. How lame. Plus, my fiancé is invisible, remember.”
“But why would a stranger’s wedding make you cry, then?”
“Marriage is one of the last ancient rites of civilization, I guess. Everyone wants someone who loves them so much they’d wear a gold ring. You know, to show everyone else their heart is taken.”
“I’m not sure it’s relevant these days.”
I try to think of how to explain it. “It’s so completely primal. He’s wearing my ring. He’s mine. He’ll never be yours.”
The slow procession of traffic takes us all back to the hotel. I hand the keys to the hotel valet and Josh attempts to steer me to the side of the building.
“Josh. No. Come on.”
“Let’s go to the room.” He’s putting on the brakes. He weighs a ton.
“You’re being ridiculous. Explain what is going on with you.”
“It’s stupid,” he mutters. “It’s nothing.”