His eyes glinted at me, more green today than brown. “You said ‘again’, Sabrina. Which insinuates you foresee a time in the future in which this would be an issue.”
Was that what I’d really said?
I replayed the words in my mind. “That wasn’t what I meant,” I said hurriedly.
“Wasn’t it?”
I wasn’t sure. Because maybe that was what I meant. What was the point in even correcting his behavior if I hadn’t, on some level, wanted there to be another time?
Still, none of that mattered if he didn’t hear me. “But did you get what I was saying?”
He sighed. “Yes, yes. Don’t be an asshole, Donovan. I heard you.” He swiveled his chair to the side. “Come here.” He used two fingers to summon me.
Didn’t sound like he took me very seriously though. And what he’d done had been a big deal.
Grudgingly, I trudged around his desk and stopped when I was a couple feet in front of him. “You heard me, but will you actually make an effort to change?”
He half-shrugged. “That sort of remains to be seen, doesn’t it? Get on your knees.”
“Remains to be seen? That doesn’t sound very committed.” Without thinking about it, I began to kneel down when my eyes hit the very large bulge in his crotch. “Wait.” I shot back up and stepped away. “Oh, no!”
“Come on.” He stroked his hand along his erection. “Door’s locked. Windows are dark.”
Goddammit. What was wrong with me? I was mad at this jerk, and he had the nerve to try to entice me to suck him off? In his office, no less? This was sexual harassment. This was inappropriate and indecent and such a fucking turn-on that I wouldn’t be surprised if Donovan could smell my arousal from a yard away.
But respect! Women’s lib!
“I’m not going to reward your bad behavior with a blowjob. That’s not why I came in here.” Though every second I stood before him it got harder and harder to remember why I existed if not for him.
“No, you came in here to tell me off. Which you did. More or less. Now we’re moving on. I’m helping you decide whether or not the other night was a one-time thing with another look at what it can be like to have sex with me.”
Donovan’s expression got serious—the kind of serious that said he was on the verge of losing patience, and I’d better listen if I knew what was good for me. “So, like I said before—get on your knees. I’m not going to tell you again.”
I was a girl who knew what was good for me.
Immediately, I fell to my knees.
The office floor was hard, even with the carpet Donovan had under his desk. It was dark brown with a tight pile that rubbed against my knees. It would leave marks if I spent much time there, even through my stockings.
But honestly, I didn’t give a fuck about my stockings. They could rip for all I cared. I was on my knees in front of Donovan Kincaid, and all I could think about, all I wanted was to get my mouth on him.
He was already undoing his pants. When he’d gotten both his belt and his zipper open, he dropped his hands to his sides. The crown of his cock peeked up at me above the band of his boxer briefs, much like it had the other night at my house. This time, however, I was eye level. This time, I was close enough to touch.
“Now this is where you make your choice,” Donovan said, his hands gripping the armrests of his chair. “If this is what you want—and by the way you’re biting your lip, I’d say this is exactly what you want—then you make the next move.”
Way to save himself when it came to consent. It was probably a wise move on his part. Not that I was going to sue him for workplace harassment, no matter how many times I brought it up. I happened to like it too much. I probably even encouraged it at times.
But there was a bigger question here now—was this really what I wanted? Did I really want there to be an “again”? What did it mean about me if I did?
Maybe I really couldn’t take care of myself. Maybe I really did need Weston or a safe guy to hide behind, someone who wouldn’t be asking me to get on my knees in the middle of a workday. Someone who didn’t get off on the idea of holding me down while he fucked me. Someone who didn’t think it was necessary to warn me that sex with him wasn’t always “easy”.
Except this was what I wanted. All of it. The dubious consent, the dominant overtones. I wanted it with every fiber of my being, and if I was a big enough girl to know that about myself then maybe I could be a big enough girl to accept it too.
Hesitantly—only because I was nervous, not because I was reluctant—I wrapped my hands around the band of his briefs. Donovan raised his hips, and I pulled his briefs down until his cock sprung out thick and heavy.
Damn, was he always this big?
He was longer than I’d realized. Rounder too. And it only made me want him more.
I just wasn’t sure where to start.
A drop of pre-cum glistened on his head as if signaling me, and I leaned forward and licked it off, slowly. Deliberately.
His cock stirred, but that didn’t mean anything. It was too gentle of a movement for Donovan, too soft, and I knew without him telling me that I needed to progress my game.
I sucked his tip, then past that, drawing the top half of his cock into my mouth. When I started to wrap my fingers around his base, he stopped me. “No hands—just your mouth.”
Okay. I could do that.
I rested my hands on his thighs instead, loving the way his muscles felt under my palms, and resumed the action with my mouth, bobbing up and down his shaft, hollowing my cheeks to make the suction tight. He tasted good—like clean and musk and Donovan, and as big as he was, he felt good. It made me horny, made me super aroused. Like the way he stretched my lips reminded my pussy how it felt to be invaded in the same way.
“Very nice,” Donovan said after I’d spent a few minutes sucking him off. “Good girl. I like that.” He brought both his hands to my head and wrapped them in my hair. “But now I’m going to take over.”
That was all the warning I got.
After that, Donovan was the one in control. With my head held in his grip, he pushed me down over his cock, slowly at first, forcing more of his length in than I’d previously taken.
“That’s it, that’s it,” he coaxed as his tip hit the back of my mouth. And still he pushed in farther. “Relax your throat, Sabrina.”
My eyes went wide. I couldn’t take any more. I was going to gag. I started to panic. I couldn’t breathe.
Yes, I could. Through my nose.
I inhaled, and my throat relaxed, and he slid in farther, deeper than I’d ever taken anyone into my mouth before.
“Jesus.” He held me there, with his cock down my throat, not moving.
After a few seconds, he let go, but immediately he pushed in deep again. “All the way. Good girl, good girl.” This time he pumped my head over him, raising and lowering me only an inch or two above his balls. “God, it feels so fucking good. Fucking your mouth like this.”
I didn’t know how I felt. Aroused. Confused. Panicked. His thrusts brushed by my gag reflex, and I could only take it so long before I was sure I’d puke, but I couldn’t do anything to tell him but claw along his legs and look up at him with watering eyes.