Logan had lied. It was all a lie.
Holy shit.
The Truth
Christina
I sat in my car, torn between going home to talk with Lauren first or going straight to find Cole and spilling my guts. I glanced at the clock on the dashboard and realized that he would still be at practice. His schedule gave me the answer I needed.
Driving home, I was on edge, antsy, hoping like hell that Lauren would be there. I needed to talk this out with her, tell her what I’d just learned, and figure out the best way to inform Cole. For whatever reason, I felt like I needed an actual plan.
I ran through the parking lot, into the complex, and busted through the door like someone was chasing me.
Lauren screamed, “You scared the heck out of me!”
“I’m so glad you’re here!” I shouted, breathing hard. Damn, I am seriously out of shape.
“What’s going on?”
“I didn’t sleep with Logan,” I said between labored breaths. “Did you hear me? I. Did. Not. Sleep. With. Logan.”
Her eyes grew wide. “How do you know?”
I leaned over, my breathing still erratic as I held up a finger. My heartrate, my mind—everything was firing at a rapid pace. “Let me get some water first.”
“Screw your water,” she shouted with a laugh. “Get over here and tell me everything.”
I poured a glass and quickly downed it before making my way to the couch. She sat there, listening, as I filled her in on Cory, her mouth agape the entire time until I said, “The end.”
“I can’t believe this. I mean, I can because I never really thought you slept with Logan in the first place, but now, we have actual proof that you didn’t.”
“I know.”
“Does Cole know?”
“Not yet.” I shook my head.
“He’s going to kill Logan,” she said with a stern look, and I realized that I hadn’t even really thought about him or what Cole would do to him.
“He deserves it.”
“Are you mad? I’m mad! Why aren’t you mad?”
I folded my arms into my lap. “I am mad. But mostly, I’m relieved more than anything. I’m happy I know the truth. And that I can stop hating myself every time I look in the mirror.”
She placed her hands on the top of my arms. “You need to find Cole.”
“He’s still at practice.”
She cocked her head to the side and studied me. “You could be sitting in the parking lot right now, making sure you see him as soon as he steps off the field. But you’re not. Why?”
I realized that I was nervous. I had wanted this information so badly, but now that I had it, I was terrified that it might not change anything. That maybe it was too late. “I wanted to talk it out first. Do I just tell him everything? We haven’t even talked once since he walked out of the apartment that day.”
“I know.”
“What if he’s moved on? Or is totally over me? Or doesn’t care anymore that it didn’t happen?”
“Let’s pretend for a second that any of those options could be real.” She rolled her eyes before continuing, “He still deserves to know the truth.”
“You’re right. You’re totally right,” I agreed because, of course, Cole deserved to know. “So, what do I do?”
“Honestly? You go find him and talk to him.”
“What if he won’t listen?” I said, admitting my biggest fear.
“You won’t know until you try.”
Pushing off the couch, I nodded and walked into my bedroom to pull myself together a little better as Lauren shouted from behind me, “I feel like you should be a little more excited about all this than you are!”
“I am excited!” I lied because I was scared more than anything else even though I wasn’t entirely sure why.
I grabbed a hoodie and threw it on over my high-waisted jeans before touching up my makeup to help me look a little less tired and a little more alive. Surprisingly, my hair looked really soft and pretty, so I didn’t mess with it. Staring at my reflection for a minute more, I apologized for being so hateful lately. And then I silently promised myself that no matter what happened with Cole, we would get through this and be okay.
I drove around town, looking for Cole’s truck, desperate to find him so I could repair what I’d thought I’d irrevocably broken. But Cole wasn’t at the batting cages, his truck wasn’t at the field, and he wasn’t at his house. I racked my brain, trying to figure out where he could be, when it hit me.
It was a long shot, but I held out hope as I drove the winding lane all the way to the top. My stomach flipped when I saw his truck in the far corner of the structure, all alone. There wasn’t another car up here. Cole’s silhouetted frame sat in the bed, and I pulled slowly next to where it was parked and cut the engine, a million emotions running through me.
Unlatching my seat belt, I opened the door and stepped out, placing my elbows on the edge. “Hey,” I said.
“How’d you find me?” His voice was cold, and a part of me had expected that, so I tried to tamp down the hurt that followed it.
“I remembered you saying that you liked to come here to think sometimes.”
“Yeah? Well, it hasn’t been working.” He faced straight ahead, his eyes avoiding mine like the plague.
“It hasn’t?”
“I used to come here to clear my head. But no. It doesn’t work anymore. Not since that day at your apartment.” He turned and looked right through me. “Why are you here, Christina?”
It took effort to swallow. My throat felt closed. I was nervous. Why am I so nervous to tell him what I considered to be relationship-changing news? “I came to talk to you.”
“Talk then.” He waved a hand but turned away from me, his eyes back on the sky as he tossed his baseball hat off.
I wanted to run my fingers through his dark hair. I wanted to touch him again.
“I didn’t sleep with Logan. He lied,” I blurted out and waited for him to focus his attention back onto me, but he didn’t budge. “He lied about everything, Cole.”
I watched him slowly nod.
“How do you know?”
“There was this girl. Um, her name is Cory. Anyway, she came up to me today and told me she was glad she ran into me. She was asking if I was okay.” I launched into what had happened earlier that afternoon as Cole finally turned to watch me with piqued curiosity. “She was asking me because she drove me home that night from The Bar. Not Logan.”
“What else did she say?” He sat up straighter, and I knew I had his full attention.
I filled him in, not sparing a single detail.
When I finished, he asked, “And you believe her?”
“Absolutely.”
Cole let out a small laugh, and it practically melted my heart on the spot. “You spit on Logan’s shoes?”
“Apparently,” I offered with a halfhearted shrug.
“You still don’t remember anything?”
“No. I wish hearing the truth had made it all come rushing back, but it didn’t.”
After talking to Cory, I had hoped to remember something from that part of the night, but it was like it never existed in my head in the first place. It was like trying to grab pieces that weren’t there.