“Acadia.” Her name fell from his lips as he swiped the wetness away with his thumb. “I assure you, I’m asking for naught. All I’m requesting is that you take from me.”
He was lost in her purple gaze, the way the color shimmered with more unshed tears. It broke his heart to see her like this, knowing he was responsible for her pain. Not her hunger, no, but the emotional influx he could sense within her.
They’d been through so much together, yet there was more keeping them apart. Hell, he held the entire future of her species, not to mention his own, in the palm of his hand. All he had to do was resurrect an ancient vampire and Acadia would be set free. Free to live without being enslaved to the angels, free to rule her race with fairness and certainty. He wasn’t even sure she realized her status within the Fae, nor was he sure she cared, but that wasn’t the point.
Another tear fell from her lashes, slowly trailing down her perfect face, breaking his heart all over again.
“I can sense your hunger,” he whispered, his hand still on her cheek, his thumb stroking the soft skin. “Take from me, Acadia. I beg of you.”
Her eyes lowered. “It’s not fair to you.”
“Who said anything about fair?” This was about necessity. He would deal with the aftermath, the need that would slay him. It was the least he deserved for all the pain he had caused her.
“I’ll want more than you’re willing to give.”
Kaj took a step closer, cupping her face with both hands. “There is absolutely nothing I will not provide you, Acadia. You are and will always be what matters most to me. Doesn’t matter what stands between us.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“I only speak the truth,” he assured her.
“But you’ve fed from others.”
He held her gaze for long seconds. “I did it so as not to burden you more than you already are.”
Even as the words came out, he knew they sounded like an excuse, as though he was putting the blame on her. That wasn’t the case.
Acadia’s perfectly arched brows lowered. “You vowed not to feed from another.”
True. He had. And he’d gone back on his word. He lived with that regret every moment of every day. Yet her happiness, her health, her very safety were what mattered most to him.
“I did,” he confirmed. “And it pains me more than you know.”
Another tear trickled from her lower lashes. This time he leaned forward, brushing his lips against her cheek to stop its descent.
He cupped the back of her head and held her to his chest. “You are my nehadon. Nothing will change that. My love will forever be pledged to you and only you. But I won’t force this mating, balisra. You deserve more than that.”
Kaj wasn’t sure what he expected in response, but for Acadia to place her small hands upon his chest wasn’t on the list. Her touch was soothing, familiar. It woke parts of him that had been dormant for weeks now.
He released her as he took a step back, lowering his arms and opening himself up to her. He was hers in every way. Whatever she needed, he would provide. It mattered not what she was willing to give in return. For the rest of his days, he would ensure she never went without even if that meant he had to. But he knew words meant so very little. Actions spoke louder and he’d betrayed them both as of late.
They remained like that for the longest time, her palms flat on his chest, their eyes locked together. Kaj could hardly breathe for wanting her, but he would refrain because no matter how long it took, Acadia would be the one to decide when they moved forward. If they moved forward.
No, he decided. He’d had it right the first time. When, not if, because once again, he was an eternal optimist. More importantly, he couldn’t think of a life without her in it, and he refused to consider the remainder of his immortal life spent without her.
There was a slight flare in her gaze a second before he felt the pull that shocked his muscles, had him locking his knees. His cock thickened the instant she began feeding from him, the energy she drew flowing through him like an erotic wave before its exit. He dropped his head back, closed his eyes, and opened himself to her completely, giving her full access to every ounce of his being.
Her sudden inhale told him she hadn’t expected that. Then again, Kaj had yet to let her see his true power, the strength that he had as the most powerful vampire in existence. After all, being the Alpha wasn’t merely a title bestowed upon him.
His cock throbbed behind his zipper, the damn thing begging for release. Ignoring it was impossible, so he squeezed his eyes closed as the sensation tore through him. His body shook, his muscles clenching to fight off the tremor. On the brink of a mind-blowing climax, he held off for as long as he could. And when it was all but inevitable, Kaj placed his hands over Acadia’s, holding them tight to his chest as he growled, the sound emerging from his chest and escaping on a rush of air. His cock kicked hard, still confined within the denim.
Acadia’s sharp cry was what had him looking down. He watched as she trembled, as though his release ignited her own. Instinct had his fangs dropping, his eyes darting to her neck, to the pulse he could see beating there.
“Kaj!” Acadia jerked her hands from beneath his before throwing herself at him.
He caught her weight with ease as she cupped his neck and pulled his head toward her.
“I need this, Kaj. I need … I need the connection. Please.”
Fuck.
A second felt like an eternity, but Kaj didn’t fight her. His upper lip pulled back from his fangs and then he was piercing her vein, sinking into her as he wrapped one arm behind her back to hold her to him. Her body trembled. His chest pressed to her breasts as she curled her hands around his neck, feeding from his energy as he drank from her. Another release threatened as her blood disappeared down his throat in big gulps. He was desperate for her, always would be. Nothing could be done about that.
His free hand slid into her hair, tugging her head back so he could sink his fangs in deeper, his lips fusing to her skin. As he breathed her in, he came again. He couldn’t stop it; the release barreled through him. The euphoria continued for an eternity as they fed from one another. It was a connection unlike any other. Another surge slammed into him, his release exploding from the head of his cock, this one stealing his breath and likely a large majority of his common sense.
Long minutes passed, but he came down from that mind-blowing high, retracting his fangs from Acadia’s neck and sealing the wounds. Neither of them made a move to pull back, though, holding one another tightly. Acadia was kneeling on the bed, Kaj standing beside it, and though they had clothing between them, he was fairly certain this was the most intimate moment they’d ever shared.
Kaj pressed his lips to her neck, breathed in her sweet cherry-blossom scent, content to remain just like that for the rest of eternity.
Unfortunately, Acadia was the one to pull back, albeit gently and only enough to meet his gaze.
“Only from me,” she whispered softly. “I only want you to feed from me, Kaj.”
Although his response was easily the affirmative, Kaj knew he had to take the opportunity to make the same request. If they were to move forward, this was something they had to get straight between them. Too much had happened of late. Too much was about to take place in the future. It was imperative the two of them get on the same page or their fight to survive would be moot. Without her in his life, Kaj knew nothing else would truly matter.