The letter went on to explain that Courtney had told Zane she had been there the night Lola showed up. That Jason had never been alone with Lola except for the few seconds when she’d walked through his room to answer the door for me. Jason had taken a sleeping pill and had no idea Lola had even been there until he woke up.
Then Zane said that Lola had a breakdown and hurt herself, and Jason was only on that motorcycle to take her to rehab. She told me nothing in the tabloids was true and that Jason had told Ernie explicitly to let me believe it if I asked.
Zane wouldn’t lie. She was the most brutally honest person I knew. And if Jason knew she’d done this without his permission, he’d fire her. She was risking her job to send me that message.
I couldn’t breathe.
Why? Why would he make that up? Why would he say something so horrible to me and want me to think so many awful things about him?
I immediately called him. The first time in three months. It went straight to voicemail.
Jason had never, in the entire six months I’d known him, had his phone off. Ringer down, yes. Phone off, no.
My number was blocked.
So Jason didn’t want to talk to me. He didn’t want me calling him. He was here, in LA, and he hadn’t come looking for me. And he’d never once reached out to me in the last three months. So why was Zane trying to get me to go over there? He clearly didn’t want to be in a relationship with me if he’d fabricate a story like this just to get out of it. He’d gone to extremes to make sure it was over between us.
And now I was angry.
When he’d first done what he did, I was devastated. Then, when I saw the pictures with Lola, I’d been hurt and disappointed. I’d spent the last few months in various states of numb confusion. But now that I knew that he’d lied to me, I was furious.
So he’d wanted to break up and he’d thought destroying me would be the easiest way to do it?
I called Zane. I thought it was going to voicemail, it rang so long before she picked up. “Hey, what’s up?” she whispered.
Jason must be there.
There was something heart wrenching about knowing he might be just on the other end of that line. Maybe I’d even hear him. My knees suddenly felt weak. I hated that he still had that effect on me, that I still loved him to stupidity.
“Why would you send me that, Zane? He obviously doesn’t want to see me.”
“Just…can you give me one second? Just hold on.”
I heard shuffling. Then a few moments later she came back. “Are you coming?” she asked, her voice low.
“No. He doesn’t want me there.”
“Yes he does,” she said. “He’s fucked up, Sloan.”
I laughed, incredulous. “He’s fucked up? He lied about sleeping with another woman and then he put me on a plane and never spoke to me again.”
Her voice went lower. “Look. Just come. I don’t know what the fuck his problem is. All I know is Jason loves you.”
I shook my head. “I think Jason loved me once, Zane. But he’s Jaxon now.”
I hung up on her.
My eyelid bounded into a full-scale attack. I paced in my living room with a palm to my eye, breathing hard.
Why? Why, Jason? I thought about those last few days and what might have made him do it. He’d said he felt like he was ruining my life—so to fix it he’d ruined my life? I scoffed.
Maybe I was too much maintenance. Maybe those weeks I’d been in Ely had shown him how much taking care of me on the road had taken a toll on him. Maybe he’d figured that I was unhappy anyway and he didn’t have the energy for it and letting me believe what I saw was a win-win. He did say he wasn’t in a place to be a boyfriend. I guess he thought he was doing me some kind of favor.
The only thing I knew for sure was this: He didn’t love me. A man who loved me wouldn’t do this. He wouldn’t light a match and set my world on fire.
My phone rang. It was Kristen, probably calling to tell me they were outside. I picked up and she started talking immediately. “Okay, don’t be mad.”
“Oh God, what?” I breathed. I couldn’t deal with Kristen’s shenanigans right now. I couldn’t deal with anything. I didn’t want to go anymore, I didn’t want to stay. God, I hated my life.
“Adrian’s on his way up there alone to get you himself.”
I groaned. “Are you kidding me?”
“Everyone was getting out of the car to come up and he was all like, ‘Stay here,’ in this really deep, very authoritative voice. It was a super alpha male move. Even Josh froze up.”
I could hear Josh laughing in the background.
Someone knocked on my door.
“I’m going to kill you guys,” I hissed, hanging up on her.
I slumped in the middle of my living room with palms to my eyeballs. How was I going to get through tonight? I couldn’t do this.
My hands were shaking. Not because my blind date was standing outside, but because of Jason. I took a deep breath and tried to steady myself.
Adrian knocked again. That playful, musical knock that friends do when they come over.
“Hold on, one second,” I called, hearing the trembling in my voice.
I took another deep breath. I shoved the envelope with the tickets and Zane’s letter into my purse and smoothed down my dress, took one more moment to compose myself, and then I opened the door.
The man standing in my hallway wore a dark-green V-neck sweater with the sleeves rolled up and jeans. He was holding a piñata shaped like a cupcake. “Hi,” he said, giving me a dazzling smile. “I’m Adrian. You must be Sloan.”
Well, Kristen was right. Adrian Copeland was gorgeous. Green eyes, close-clipped beard, a nice body.
I was 100 percent not interested.
He held out the piñata. “I was told to bring this up?” he said, looking amused.
I rolled my eyes. “Of course you were,” I mumbled, taking it and setting it on a table inside the door.
Tucker spilled out into the hallway, jumping excitedly on Adrian’s legs. He crouched down to pet him. “Hey there, little guy.” He smiled up at me while he ruffled my dog.
He was checking me out. Big-time. He wasn’t even trying to hide it. His eyes dropped down my body and came back up with a grin.
A fierce blush roared up my neck.
The letter had me so flustered I couldn’t even think straight. All I could think about was what Zane had said. I wasn’t in the right headspace to deal with what I’d just learned, let alone this stranger who was trying to date me, here in my doorway, shamelessly ogling me and playing with my dog—Jason’s dog—Jason, who was here in my city and hadn’t come to see me because he broke up with me and didn’t want me anymore.
My other eyelid twitched once, just to remind me that today could still get worse.
“I’m sorry,” I said, reaching for Tucker’s collar. “He gets really excited when people come over. Tucker, let’s go.”
“It’s fine,” Adrian said. “I like dogs.” He let Tucker lick his chin.
God. I was two seconds from maniacal cackling.
Tucker finally finished with him and ran back into the apartment and Adrian stood.
Time to get this over with.
I grabbed my purse and slung it over my shoulder. Then I stepped out into the hallway and closed the door.