When Ellis’s dark blue gaze locks with mine, the taut ball of energy inside me evaporates. The world seems to stop. Calmness rushes over me like a cool balm, and I know, in that instant, he feels it, too.
How could he not? What we share is too much, too resilient, too infinite to be ignored or dismissed.
I watch as his confident steps waver slightly, his eyes widening just a touch, and his full lips open on a shaky inhale. But it’s his stare that tells me everything. Despite his brief hesitancy, he knows.
No, he doesn’t know me. I am a stranger to him. But he feels it.
Connection. Tether. Us. Always us.
“Macsen Evans, this is Ellis Probert, my cousin and owner of Safe Harbour.”
I manage to tear my gaze away from Ellis to acknowledge Iris as she introduces us, and then, once more, my eyes find his. I hold out my hand in greeting, desperately needing that first touch of his skin on mine.
Whereas he initially looked a little startled, now his blue eyes have narrowed slightly, his gaze piercing and more acute, and instead of his first words being a greeting, he says, “Do I know you? Have we met before?”
My hand hovers in mid-air, and I want to say ‘Yes, you know me. Can’t you see?’ I want to close the distance between us, pull him close and say, ‘It’s me. I’ve missed you. So fucking much.’ But Ellis can’t know any of that. Not yet, at least. I will be honest with him eventually, but that moment will have to wait until the time is right.
I bury the need to be truthful, schooling my features and hiding all the emotions churning inside me, and with an unassuming smile say instead, “No, I don’t think so.”
The lie hurts despite the easy way it slips off my tongue.
I can see from the way his brow furrows that he isn’t convinced. I know what the connection between us is; he doesn’t. It’s an unfair advantage I have—only unfair if you don’t count the agonising years I’ve spent searching for him.
I let him drink his fill of me as his eyes roam the planes of my face, open curiosity in his gaze, along with a hefty dose of disbelief, and I use the moment to do the same until a throat clears beside us.
Dropping my hand without getting that first contact is agony, and I once more turn to face Iris even though I don’t want to take my gaze off Ellis for even a second.
“Well, uh, now that introductions are out of the way, did you want to take a look at the room?”
I’m about to add a verbal affirmation to my nod when Ellis interrupts. His voice is deep and endless, sinking into my bones and settling there.
“I’ll take him up. You can cash in and head home if you want.” He tears his gaze away from my face and softens his tone with, “It’s been a busy day. Why not get an early finish for once? We can cope without you for closedown.”
Iris blinks, her eyes flicking from Ellis to me and then back again, and I can tell this isn’t something she was expecting or that happens often by the way her eyes bore into his, her expression asking questions her mouth hasn’t voiced.
“Are you sure? I mean I can—”
“Totally sure.” Ellis cuts her off once more. “Now get out of here before I change my mind.” Then he looks at me and through a tight jaw adds, “If you’d like to finish your drink, I’ll show you upstairs once I’ve sorted some things in the kitchen. Shouldn’t be more than ten minutes.”
He doesn’t give me a chance to respond, turning on his heels and striding back the way he came. I stare after him, legs restless with the need to follow until he disappears from view.
“Well, that wasn’t weird,” Iris mutters at my side, her gaze also on the door still swinging with Ellis’s departure.
I turn my head to look at her and paste on a smile I don’t feel.
That’s not the way it was supposed to go.
“He’s not usually that…” She struggles to find a suitable word and eventually settles on “brusque.”
“It’s fine.” I shrug, lifting my drink to my lips with a shaky hand. “End of the day and all that.”
She huffs out a laugh. “Yeah, I guess.”
Silence stretches out between us, and I can tell she wants to say more, but I don’t encourage it, sipping my drink and ignoring the feel of her astute gaze.
“Well, I’ll, uh, get myself out of here before he changes his mind. I can’t remember the last time he gave anyone an early finish. Let alone me.”
She offers a cheery wave to the man behind the bar who served me earlier, much to his bemusement, and then says, “Goodnight, Macsen. Maybe I’ll call over to the manor and see what plans you have for her. I haven’t been there in years. It will be good to see the old girl restored to her former glory.”
“Sure, anytime,” I offer, meaning it but needing to see Ellis return more than I need to make small talk with a pretty girl.
“Okay, great.” She smiles at me, but it still holds a little concern. “I’ll probably see you tomorrow. Hopefully, my grumpy cousin is in a better mood when he comes back out, and doesn’t scare you off us Lily Bay locals for good.”
I laugh at that. “I think that’s impossible. I’m not going anywhere.”
Iris slips off her apron, giving me one last goodbye before disappearing through a door at the other side of the bar. Moments later, she emerges with a bag and jacket, says goodbye to her colleagues, and gives me one last wave before heading off into the night.
“Refill?”
I look up to see the same barkeeper as before, only this time, he’s taking the measure of me alongside his question about my empty glass.
“No. Thank you. I’m just waiting for the owner.”
He keeps staring at me, curiosity clear on his face.
“I’m Macsen.” I hold my hand over the bar in introduction. “I’m going to rent the room above for a few months.”
“Taliesin,” he offers in response, taking my hand in his for a quick but firm handshake. “But everyone calls me Tal.”
I nod once. “Nice to meet you, Tal.”
He purses his lips in thought, and I can see he wants to quiz me further, but settles on, “So you’re new to the bay?”
“Yes, I arrived here today.”
“And you bought the old manor house?”
“I did.”
He sucks in air through his teeth. “Paid a pretty penny for that old ruin, too, or so I’ve heard.”
Another awkward nod.
“Quit with the interrogation, Tal,” a deep voice interrupts, the tenor washing over me and soothing my frayed nerves despite the terse tone. For years I’ve wondered how his voice would sound. Hearing it now is the most basic seduction and serves only to magnify the pull inside me.
Ellis appears with the same tight look on his face as he had when he left. It’s the closest we’ve been, yet I am still taken aback by the urge to stand and erase what little space there is between us. Those few inches apart seem unbearable after all this time. The desire I have to hold him is so strong it almost knocks me off my seat, and it’s all I can do to resist the need to lean closer to him.
“Just getting to know the newbie,” Tal replies, utterly oblivious to the internal war I’m waging, and the pulsing energy that thrums between Ellis and me. He wears a broad smile on his handsome face and has a wicked glint in his eye at his boss’s terse tone.