Bikram pulled a pack of gum out of his pocket and offered it to Jas.
“Telling me my breath stinks?” Jas tried, a rough attempt at a joke.
“Nah, it’s not too bad, but it could be better. Especially if you find yourself in close quarters with someone you want to kiss.”
Jas froze.
That was his mistake.
Like a predator scenting prey, Bikram faced him. “Oh my God. You kissed someone.”
“I did not.”
“Who?”
“No one.” Too quick, damn it. He had answered too quick!
His brother nearly bounced on his toes. “It was Katrina, right? I knew she wasn’t just a client!”
Jas growled. “Shut up.”
“I like her. This is great.”
“You didn’t like her this morning.”
“I changed my mind. Have you eaten her cobbler? It’s amazing.” Bikram paused for a breath. “You kiiiiiiiissed her.”
He resisted the immature urge to pull his brother into a headlock to get that smug look off his face. “Bikram.”
“Admit it. Admit it, and I’ll leave you alone.”
He gritted his teeth. “I kissed her, okay?”
The words slammed between them and Jas closed his eyes. He hadn’t meant to say that. He shouldn’t have said that. Not to Bikram, not when he hadn’t so much as apologized to Katrina.
Bikram whistled.
Jas scrubbed his hands over his face. “I didn’t mean that.”
“Uh-huh. When did it happen?”
“You said you’d leave me alone if I admitted it.”
“I lied. You don’t seem happy about this. Did she not like it? Are you a bad kisser?”
Jesus. How had they even gotten from talking about his grandfather potentially disowning him to this? “I don’t think so.”
Bikram’s face turned grave. “You don’t know if someone likes it when they’re kissing you yet? Oh, Jas. That’s so sad. How much did you come in? How much did she?”
“What?”
“There’s a seventy percent test when you want to kiss someone.” Bikram crossed his arms over his chest. “You lean in seventy percent. Then they lean in thirty percent. If they don’t lean in, you lean back. How much did she lean?”
He replayed the kiss in his head, but trying to figure out the percentages of their leans baffled him. “I don’t know.”
“Hmm, yes, yes, I see.” Bikram paced in front of him, stroking his beard. “What about eyes? Open or closed?”
“Mine or hers?”
“Both.”
“I don’t remember, Bikram.”
“This is important stuff.”
He threw up his hands. “I don’t see why.”
“Because I don’t think you’re upset about the kiss, you’re upset because you don’t know if she liked it. Like, if she had liked it, would you be okay?”
Yes. If she had liked it and wanted it, he’d be better than okay.
“Aha,” Bikram said softly. “Knew it.”
Jas tugged at his collar. It might be cool outside, but he was too warm. “Knew what?”
“One thing you learn when you spend a lot of time with crews is how to read people. Whenever you’d call, I would count how many times you said Katrina. Katrina said this, Katrina did that, Katrina’s so smart, Katrina . . . after a while I had to stop counting. Especially after Hardeep died and you moved to Santa Barbara.”
Probably because he’d no longer felt so guilty about coveting his boss’s wife.
Bikram shook his head when Jas stiffened. “You were so gone on her, I think that’s when I kinda started assuming she was keeping you wrapped around her finger.” He pointed at the house. “But she’s earnest and sweet, and she really loves that big dog, so if you are wrapped around her finger, I think that’s okay.”
Bikram was a sucker for animal lovers. “Where are you going with this?”
“I’m saying . . . I don’t know if she likes you, or liked that kiss, but I know you like her and you liked that kiss. You could try telling her that and see what happens.”
Like was too weak a word. He liked his mom’s rotis and he liked the smell of rain.
He . . . well, he more than liked Katrina.
When he didn’t reply to Bikram’s suggestion, his brother gave a half laugh. “Okay, fine. Bury down your feelings on this if you want, or you could have a conversation like damned adults. You might be surprised what comes of it.”
“And if nothing comes of it?” Jas asked roughly. He would have disturbed their relationship more and could be left with nothing.
“And if something comes of it?” Bikram countered.
The words shut Jas up. Such a simple way to turn his own fear around. Both realities were possible. Right?
Bikram straightened away from the car as Katrina came out the front door of the big house. She held multiple foil packages in her hands, which told him Daisy had packed up the whole table for her to reheat later.
Bikram slapped him on the back. “Quit dancing around each other. It must be exhausting. Wouldn’t it be so nice to stop fighting all this?”
Jas watched his brother walk away, the words hitting close to home. He was exhausted. Exhausted from shoving everything down. The other things he locked up tight in his soul, he did it because they made him feel bad.
His feelings for Katrina made him feel good.
Her hips swayed as she walked toward him, and the moonlight lit her hair a silvery brown. Jas opened the back door. She was so beautiful, and Bikram was right. He wasn’t sorry he’d kissed her. He wanted to kiss her again.
He took the packages from her once she was close enough. She murmured her thanks and ignored the open back door to get into the front passenger seat.
“What are you doing?”
She buckled her seat belt. “I’ve always hated sitting back there. I’ll sit here from now on.”
Okay. What was that about?
She closed her door before he could ask. Jas put the food into the trunk and wiped his sweaty hands on his pants.
He felt like a teenager, or about as emotionally fluent as one. He started the car and searched for something to say, but she spoke first.
“You never talk about your grandpa.”
There was no accusation in her voice, but his hands tightened on the steering wheel. “I don’t.” He coughed once. “You can see why. We have a complicated relationship.”
“I can see that he loves you, but he’s also deeply, terribly angry with you.”
She deserved some kind of explanation for having to sit through that dinner. “My grandpa was mad when I joined the Army.” That was an understatement. “When he was young, he protested wars, railed against the military complex. I think it’s because his dad was in the British Army, and he saw what that short stint did to him. Grandpa didn’t talk to me for a year after I was deployed. And then, after I was injured and discharged, I think he got madder that I didn’t come home to the farm.” Instead, Jas had gone to work for Hardeep. It had been a heaven-sent job, where he could contribute something and heal and learn new skills.
She angled her body toward him. “Did he want you to take over the farm?”