“Stay with me, baby.” I whisper against her temple. “You just have to stay with me.”
22
Lev
Kat’s hand twitches in mine, and for a second, I drag my eyes up to her face with a hope I haven’t felt in days. But beneath the bandages and the wires, and the monitors beeping around her, nothing has changed.
When we arrived at the hospital, I didn’t know what to expect when they made me hand her off. I just told them they had to save her. It was the only thing I could manage. After the medical staff took her away, it felt like days had passed before we finally saw a doctor. All she could tell us was that Kat had sustained a lot of head trauma, and now the entire team keeps assuring me that this medically-induced coma will reduce the swelling in her brain and give her the best chances of survival. Best, but not guaranteed. They never say that. They never say much of anything other than they are taking it one day at a time.
Beside me, Gleb sits like a sentinel, quiet and pensive. He’s been here the entire time, and even though we haven’t managed to say much to each other, our shared grief is enough. I’m grateful for his presence, and in a way, I find it comforting and odd. I’ve only known the man a short while, but it’s become clear to me that his strong, steady presence is that of a father figure. He was a father before he ever knew it. And I think in some strange way, he is the father figure I’d been looking for in Vasily for half of my life.
One thing I can’t regret is bringing him and Kat together. While I’ve been sitting here, feeling helpless, he’s called every specialist on the East Coast to ensure Kat’s getting the best possible treatment. Some have shown up personally while others review her medical chart from wherever they are and offer their opinions. But even though I don’t doubt Gleb has assembled the best medical team in the nation, it doesn’t change anything. Time. That’s all they keep telling us. She just needs time.
“When this is over…” His voice stirs me from my thoughts. “I want you to get her out of this world, Lev. I don’t want this life for her.”
I meet his gaze, the certainty in his tone a comfort I haven’t known before. When this is over. Not if.
“I did what I set out to do,” I answer. “I’m done. When I bring Kat home, I’m going to be the most boring fuck she’s ever met in her life. I’ll put on a polo, go to work, whatever it takes. I don’t care. I’m leaving this chapter behind, and she’s coming with me.”
“Good.” Gleb nods. “But don’t go too far, okay? I just met her. I want to see you guys around, maybe even watch my grandkids grow up. It would be a nice change of pace for me.”
“I’ll have to talk to Kat.” My voice is thick. “But I think she’d like that too.”
“You should eat something,” he grunts. “Or go take a shower. It won’t do her any good to wake up and find you looking like hell.”
“I can’t leave her.” I swallow. “Not until I know she’s okay.”
“It’s going to take time,” he says. “Remember what the doctors said?”
I do. They told us that Kat is unconscious, but she will likely have glimpses of awareness of her surroundings. She’ll dream a lot and try to make sense of things in her own mind. And it’s very likely that she’ll hear us on occasion, so I’ve made it a point to tell her every day to focus on getting better. Not to worry. And I know Gleb is right. If she’s in there, listening to us like they say, she’s probably yelling at me for not doing better. Taking care of myself. Going to see Josh. I’m failing at everything, and it’s ripping my fucking heart out.
“I’m going to go grab a cup of coffee,” I tell Gleb to appease him. “And call Josh.”
He nods, and I disappear into the void of the hallway. The scent of disinfectant and crappy hospital food burns my nostrils as my shoes squeak across the floor. When I get to the cafeteria and grab a coffee, the lady at the register offers me a sympathetic smile. She’s seen me every day for the past week.
“One of these days, you should try the food too, ,” she suggests. “I hear it’s quite the novelty.”
“Thanks.” I nod. “I’ll think about it.”
I take a seat by the window and pull the lid off my cup, letting the steam billow out while I grab my phone and pull up Maxim’s number. I’ve never been more grateful for the old man in my entire life. If he wasn’t with Josh right now, I don’t even know how I’d be able to stay with Kat.
“Hey,” he answers on the second ring. “The sun is out. I’m hoping that means there’s good news today.”
“Not yet,” I tell him. “How’s everything going there?”
“We’re doing just fine,” he answers. “Josh is running me ragged, but it’s good for an old man to be young at heart again. You want to talk to the little fella?”
“Please.”
He pulls up the video chat, something Josh had to show him how to do, and I force a smile when my boy’s face comes into view. He has what looks like blueberry and marshmallow smeared across his cheek, and I can only imagine what he’s been eating this week. Gleb gave him free rein to order anything he wants from the housekeeper, and it looks like Josh is taking full advantage of that.
“How are you, buddy?” I ask.
“Good.” He smiles. “Uncle Maxim and I are going swimming again today. He said if I beat him across the pool again, then I get ice cream.”
“Uncle Maxim?”
I quirk a brow, and Maxim shrugs in the background. “It’s new. I figured—”
“It’s perfect,” I tell him. We might have the most fucked-up family in the world, but we are a family. Just last week, I explained to Josh that Gleb is his grandfather, and he accepted it with one simple question. Could he go swimming at Grandpa Gleb’s all the time?
“So, ice cream, huh?” I force my voice to be light as I examine Josh’s happy face. “Are you getting any veggies in there too?”
“He’s having some carrots with lunch,” Maxim assures me.
Josh nods. “And chicken nuggets.”
“Well, you keep holding down the fort for me, okay, buddy? I’m going to keep taking care of Mommy, but I promise I’ll come to see you just as soon as I can.”
“Is Mommy’s owie better?” he asks, hope shining in his eyes.
Acid burns my throat as I nod. “She’s still getting lots of rest so she can try to get rid of the owie.”
“Can you give her a hug for me?” Josh asks. “And tell her that I beat Uncle Maxim at swimming?”
“I’ll tell her,” I assure him. “I love you, buddy.”
He grins, blue lips stretching wide. “I love you too, Daddy.”
Maxim takes the phone off video chat and gets back on the line. “Are you sure I can’t bring you anything? A change of clothes? Something to eat?”
“No, I’m good. I just appreciate you staying with Josh. I feel better having him there.”
Even though the threat is gone, it doesn’t mean my worries are. I think when it comes to my family, I will always worry.