From there, there’s a lot of debate over what food to order and by the time room service arrives, Rick and I have moved in closer to the rest of the team and claimed a couple of seats. By the time the food is devoured, I’m reviewing the missions Rick documented, looking for anything that feels familiar. What becomes familiar quickly, is that most of Rick’s missions included someone dying. I knew this, of course. He’s told me. And these missions aren’t just his missions. My father was involved. I also don’t miss the fact that these were carried out on bad actors who intended to hurt our country. Rick had morals. He didn’t kill the little boy, not intentionally, at least. He tried to save him.
I’m on the final mission, a diplomat to a foreign country who was killed along with his security team. I swallow hard. “This one.”
Rick glances at the printed document in my hand and then at me. “Why this one?”
My mind flashes back in time, and then the entire table is staring at me. “I was with Gabriel. The news was on, featuring this story. It pulled his attention from the cigar he’d been lighting at the time and while his expression didn’t change, there was this look in his eyes. I can’t explain it anyway but victorious. So much so that I was going to ask him about it, but his cellphone rang. The call was fast. He didn’t even say hello. Someone said something to him and he disconnected. For some reason, when he hung up, my gut warned me to let it go. Which of course, we all know the reason now. It was self-preservation.
“He ordered the hits,” Rick says. “His name fits the initials on our instructions. This isn’t news.”
“But it’s more substantial than initials on a paper. It’s a mission I know he can be connected to.” I swallow hard. “But there’s more.”
Rick arches a brow, urging me for that “more” without words.
“The next morning, I went to my father’s house, and we were making pancakes. We were standing there at his island laughing when that same news story came on. He paused, listened and then said, “Not many people I wish dead, but that man, good riddance.”
“He wasn’t wrong,” Rick says. “He slaughtered thousands of his own people to silence them. I’m not sure that comment means anything.”
“Except they both reacted to the same story,” I argue. “We know they were both part of this black ops operation. It seems like they both had a reaction that said they were invested. If we can’t prove Gabriel’s involvement, maybe my father can help. He was involved. Maybe he actually has proof he can offer.”
“We know your father didn’t know Gabriel was the head of the black ops operation,” Rick reminds me. “We have enough data to lead us to believe he found out, he wanted you out, and that put him on Gabriel’s hitlist.”
“This list of missions isn’t going to help. My father can help. We just need him back here now.”
“We need a backup plan,” Rick says.
“What am I?” Asher asks. “Chicken feed? Don’t count me out.”
I focus on Rick, on the backup plan. “Because my father might not make it out alive.” The reality of this guts me like literally the idea is a knife cutting me open right here and now.
“Candy, baby—”
“I know he might not make it back,” I say. “I just needed to say it out loud. I need to force myself to be ready for anything. That’s what you don’t get. I deal with things better upfront and with brutal honesty. But damn it, Rick, if I can handle this, you have to handle your reality, too.”
His eyes narrow on me. “Meaning what?”
“We aren’t going to take down Gabriel by the party on Saturday. It won’t happen. And I’m the cover you need to take out Tag and save my father.” I lean in closer. “I’m going to the party. I’m going to be on Gabriel’s arm. And you can survive that with the promise that you get revenge.” I stand up. “And now, I’m going to our room, where we can fight properly and you can save face when you lose said fight.” I glance around the room. “Goodnight, everyone.”
And with that, I walk out of the room.
CHAPTER FIVE
Savage
Possessiveness rises hard and fast inside me, and mixes with protectiveness and yes, fear. I fear losing Candace and not because she’s angry. Because my enemies want to rip her right from my damn arms. I’m on my feet before she ever exits the dining area. I don’t tell the Walker team to leave. They get it. Candace and I need to be alone.
They stand and start gathering their things.
I’m out of the dining room and on her heels the moment she enters the bedroom. I’m there, right there, behind her, kicking the door shut, and catching her arm, pulling her around to face me. “I don’t want you near Gabriel. I damn sure won’t let him touch you again.”
“And I didn’t want you to leave me but you did what you thought you had to do to protect me. And I’m doing what I need to do to protect you and my father.”
The words bite with plenty of fangs. “Is that how it is? You’re going to throw the past in my face?”
“No, that’s not how it’s going to be, but I’m angry with you, Rick.” She pokes at my chest. “Really angry. I didn’t realize how angry until right here, right this minute.”
“You know—”
“That you regret leaving?” she challenges.
“You know I do.”
“And yet you come up with reasons to leave over and over again. That’s why I’m angry. Every second I fear the next reason will be the final reason.” Her voice vibrates with emotion and I get. I feel it—this need to hold on, to keep holding on.
“Baby, I told you. I’m not going anywhere. Ever again.”
“You’re afraid to be straight with me. You’re afraid to tell me what’s really going on. That fear leads right back to goodbye. The moments add up, Rick. They did before. I notice them, too. I know when you have moments of doubt. I’m not blind like I was in the past.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Ten mission. Ten kills. The moment at the table when you knew I knew that. The moment in the car when you were in your head, judging yourself for killing Wes and deciding I must be, too.” I open my mouth to speak, and she holds up a hand. “Judging yourself for making me a target when we both know this is all so much bigger than that now.”
“I told you. I’ve had a taste of you and us together again, baby. I’m too selfish to walk away again.”
“That’s not a denial of those moments, now is it?”
“No. They happened. They aren’t the end of us.”
“God, I wish you could be that selfish person you claim to be now, Rick, but you aren’t. That’s not who you are. That divide that separated us, it’s forming again.”
“Nothing is happening again besides us being together.”
“You didn’t want me to know about Tag’s threat. You didn’t think I could handle it. I’m not stupid. I had a blade to my neck tonight. I know what a manipulator Tag is. He’s using my father as leverage. Why would he not use me? He’s already used me. I can put two and two together.”