“Poppy, I’ve no idea what you’re talking about. But we have to put this on pause. I have stuff I need to do.” His phone buzzes and he lifts it to his ear. “Hey, Vicks. You made it. OK, on my way.”
“I know you’re dealing with a crisis.” I grab his arm fiercely. “But there’s an old man waiting to hear from you, Sam. Longing to hear from you. For only five minutes. And you know what? I envy you.”
Sam exhales sharply. “For fuck’s sake, Poppy, you’ve got this all wrong.”
“Have I?” I stare up at him, feeling all my buried emotions starting to bubble. “I just wish I had your chance. To see my dad. You don’t know how lucky you are. That’s all.”
A tear trickles down my cheek, and I brush it away brusquely.
Sam is silent. He puts his phone away and faces me square-on. When he speaks, his voice is gentle.
“Listen, Poppy. I can understand how you feel. I don’t mean to trivialize family relationships. I have a very good relationship with my father, and I see him whenever I can. But it’s not that easy, bearing in mind that he lives in Hong Kong.”
I gasp with horror. Are they so out of touch? Did he not even know his father had moved back to this country?
“Sam!” My words tumble out. “You don’t understand! He’s moved back. He lives in Hampshire! He sent you an email. He wanted to see you. Don’t you read anything?”
Sam throws back his head and roars with laughter, and I stare at him, affronted.
“OK,” he says at last, wiping his eyes. “Let’s start from the beginning. Let’s get this straight. You’re talking about the email from David Robinson, right?”
“No, I’m not! I’m talking about the one from—”
I break off midstream, suddenly uncertain. Robinson? Robinson? I grab my phone and check the email address: David r452@ hotmail. com.
I just assumed he was David Roxton. It seemed obvious he was David Roxton.
“Contrary to your assumptions, I did read that email,” Sam is saying. “And I chose to ignore it. Believe me, David Robinson is not my father.”
“But he called himself Dad.” I’m totally bewildered. “That’s what he wrote. Dad. Is he … your stepdad? Your half-dad?”
“He’s not my dad in any shape or form,” says Sam patiently. “If you must know, when I was at college I hung out with a group of guys. He was one of them. David Andrew Daniel Robinson. D.A.D. Robinson. We called him Dad. OK? Got it, finally?”
He starts walking toward the hotel as though the subject is closed, but I’m rooted to the spot, my mind flitting around in shock. I can’t get over this. Dad isn’t Sam’s dad? Dad is a friend? How was I supposed to know that? People shouldn’t be allowed to sign themselves as Dad unless they are your dad. It should be the law.
I’ve never felt so stupid in all my life.
Except … Except. As I’m standing there, I can’t help replaying all David Robinson’s emails in my head.
It’s been a long time. I think of you often…. Did you ever get any of my phone messages? Don’t worry, I know you’re a busy fellow…. As I said, there is something I’d love to talk to you about. Are you ever down Hampshire way?
OK. So maybe I got it wrong about Sam’s father and the cottage and the faithful dog. But these words still touch a nerve in me. They sound so humble. So self-effacing. This David is clearly an old, old friend who wants to reach out. Maybe this is another relationship which Sam is leaving to wither. Maybe they’ll see each other and the years will fall away and afterward Sam will thank me and tell me how he needs to value friendship more, he simply didn’t realize it, and I’ve transformed his life….
Abruptly, I hurry after Sam and catch up with him.
“So, is he a good friend?” I begin. “David Robinson? Is he, like, a really old, close chum?”
“No.” Sam doesn’t break his stride.
“But you must have been friends once.”
“I suppose so.”
Could he sound any less enthusiastic? Does he realize how empty his life will be if he doesn’t keep up with the people who were once important to him?
“So, surely he’s someone you still have a bond with! If you saw him, maybe you’d rekindle that! You’d bring something positive into your life!”
Sam stops dead and stares at me. “What business is this of yours, anyway?”
“Nothing,” I say defensively. “I just … I thought you might like to get in touch with him.”
“I am in touch with him.” Sam sounds exasperated. “Every year or so we meet for a drink, and it’s always the same story. He has some new entrepreneurial project he needs investors for, usually involving some ridiculous product or pyramid scheme. If it’s not fitness equipment, it’s double-glazing or time-shares in Turkey. Against my better judgment I give him some money. Then the business folds and I don’t hear from him again for another year. It’s a ridiculous cycle I need to break. Which is why I blanked his email. I’ll call him in a month or two, maybe, but right now, frankly, the last thing I need in my life is David bloody Robinson—” He breaks off and peers at me. “What?”
I gulp. There’s no way round this. None.
“He’s waiting for you in the bar.”
Maybe Sam hasn’t turned into a statue quite yet. Because as we head into the hotel, he says nothing, but I can easily read his feelings on his face, the entire range of them: from anger, to fury, to frustration, to …
Well. Back to anger again.82
“Sorry,” I say yet again. “I thought …”
I peter out. I’ve already explained what I thought. It hasn’t really helped, to be honest.
We push our way through the heavy double doors to see Vicks hurrying down the corridor toward us, holding a phone to her ear, struggling with a pile of stuff and looking harassed.
“Sure,” she’s saying as she nears us. “Mark, wait a minute. Just met Sam. I’ll ring you back.” She looks up and launches in with no niceties. “Sam, I’m sorry. We’re going with the original statement.”
“What?” Sam’s voice is so thunderous, I jump. “You have to be kidding.”
“We have nothing on Ryan. No proof of anything untoward. There’s no more time. I’m sorry, Sam. I know you tried, but …”
There’s a tense silence. Sam and Vicks aren’t even looking at each other, but the body language is obvious. Vicks’s arms are now wrapped defensively around her laptop and a mass of papers. Sam is kneading both fists into his forehead.
Personally, I’m trying to blend into the wallpaper.
“Vicks, you know this is bollocks.” Sam sounds as though he’s trying hard to control his impatience. “We know what happened. What, we ignore all this new information?”
“It’s not information, it’s guesswork! We don’t know what happened!” Vicks looks up and down the empty corridor and lowers her voice. “And if we don’t get a statement out to ITN, pronto, we are sitting fucking ducks, Sam.”
“We have time,” he says mutinously. “We can talk to this guy Ryan. Interview him.”