“What? Why?” Her frown deepened. “I thought you guys weren’t anything more than friends with benefits. You said you were happy with that.”
“We are and I am.” Although I didn’t know for how much longer. Not wanting to think about the inevitable end, though, I focused on explaining Cyrus’s plan to April. “He invited me and I said no because of the shop. Then he offered to pay off my debts if I went with him.”
“Is he that desperate to get fucked on foreign soil? Are you guys even exclusive with this little arrangement you’ve got going on? I mean, surely it would have been cheaper for him to just find a girl over there to get off with while he was there.”
Something dark twisted in my stomach as my mind conjured up an image of Cyrus with some faceless Italian supermodel. Because of course the woman he picked up in my imagination would be a supermodel but one with big boobs and a brain between her ears.
Stop it, I chided myself. He has every right to pick up a supermodel whether I go with him or not.
At that thought, the dark twisted thing knotted and left me feeling a little sick. I shoved the feeling down with as much strength as I could muster and refused to pay any attention to it.
“Maybe it would have been cheaper, but I’m not sure some random person would have agreed to pretend to be his wife.”
“Girl, anyone would pretend to be his wife. Have you seen him?” She gave me a pointed look before frowning again. “More to the point, why does he need a pretend wife?”
“Something about his ex being there.” I sighed as I thought back to the call I’d gotten from him last night. “Apparently, she’s a real piece of work and he doesn’t want to show up single when he knows she’s going to be there.”
“It sounds like he wants to use you to make her jealous.” April’s nose crinkled. “How do you feel about that?”
“I don’t mind.” There might have been a teeny, tiny bit of untruth to that statement. “He’s not my boyfriend, April. He’s just a friend. If he wants to pick someone else up while we’re overseas, he can do it. Though he’d have to know the benefits part of our friendship would end if he did. As for wanting to make his ex jealous, why not? It’s kind of the dream, right? To be the winner in the breakup?”
She rolled her eyes at me. “Just a friend. Right. I forgot. The point isn’t who’s winning in his breakup. It’s that he wants to use you to do it.”
“That’s kind of flattering, right? I think it’s cool that he thinks being with me would make her jealous.” Lies, more lies. God, what’s wrong with me?
April pursed her lips. “Don’t sell yourself short. You could make any girl jealous, but again, that’s not the point. The point is that he wants to use you.”
“So what?” I shrugged. “He’s paying off my debts in return and I get to keep the shop. Who cares if I have to act all lovey-dovey with him for a couple of days?”
I had a feeling I cared, but I didn’t mention it. April was already convinced that I wasn’t capable of maintaining a relationship like the one I had with Cyrus. I didn’t want to give her any reason to think that she was right.
All that would do was worry her. She’d think I was falling for him and want to protect me from that. Heck, I wouldn’t have been surprised if she tracked down my airline ticket and burnt it to keep me away from him if she thought I was in danger of getting hurt.
I really, literally couldn’t afford not to go on this trip and keep up my end of the bargain. If I didn’t go, the shop was as good as gone. It was that simple and that complicated all rolled into one happy, depressing package.
Why, oh why did it have to be marriage we had to pretend about?
April shot me a worried glance as she waited in the long line of cars in front of the school. “Well, as long as you’re sure you’re really okay with it. All I know is, I wouldn’t like knowing I was being used. On the other hand, knowing is better than not knowing, I guess.” She shrugged. “Hell, maybe it’s not that bad. At least you know what his intentions are and why. That’s a ton more honesty than I ever got with my ex.”
“Cyrus and I are always honest with each other.” It was refreshing to know I had that kind of relationship with him, but it was also a little scary. At least he wasn’t asking questions I couldn’t give him the honest answers to. “It’s one of my favorite things about us.”
“Us, huh?” She lifted both her eyebrows and pressed her lips into a thin line. “But sure. There’s nothing more going on between you guys than friendship.”
The line of cars snaked slowly forward until finally, we reached the front. Adi hopped into the backseat and dumped her backpack on the floor before fastening herself in. “Hi, Mom. Hey, Luna. What are you doing here?”
I twisted in my seat to face her as well as I could and smiled. “I wanted to come with mommy to pick you up because I’m going out of town for a few days and I wanted to say goodbye.”
The corners of her lips turned down. “Where are you going? How long will you be gone?”
“Less than a week. I’m going to Italy. Want me to bring you something back from there?”
Adi brightened up instantly, licking her lips as she thought. “Definitely. I want chocolate and some Italian money and pizza.”
“I don’t know that I’ll be able to bring back pizza, sweetheart. The chocolate and the money I can do.”
“Okay.” She sighed. “I guess that’s fine.”
“Let me tell you what. I’ll get what you asked for and I’ll pick you up something nice as well. How does that sound?”
“Good.”
“Just good?” I reached out and wiggled my fingers like I was about to tickle her tummy.
She hooted with laughter and squirmed even though I hadn’t touched her. “No, not just good. Great. It sounds great.”
“Awesome.” I smiled and retracted my hand, tuning out April’s voice when she started asking Adi about her homework.
One of the best things about being the cool aunt was not having to worry about things like homework. Instead, I let my mind drift to Cyrus and the conversation I’d just had with April.
I hated that I hadn’t been entirely truthful with her, but how was I supposed to tell her that I felt sick when I thought about Cyrus with anyone else? How was I supposed to admit that she had been right and that I was finding it more and more difficult to separate my feelings from the sex?
The truth was that I didn’t like the idea that he was using me but not for the reasons she thought. I didn’t like it because I was jealous. Jealous that Cyrus cared enough to try to make his ex jealous when I knew he would never care about me that way at all.
Chapter 30
Cyrus
Luna couldn’t seem to tear her eyes away from the window as we landed at Marco Polo Airport in Venice. I’d chosen seats on the right side of the plane so she’d have a good view of the islands coming in, and since it was almost mid-morning, the sun was starting to burn off the light drizzle that had blanketed the city earlier.