Leaving the two men by the stairs, hoping they wouldn’t kill each other but not putting it past them, she found her father in the sitting room, nursing a bottle of water.
“I figured you’d want a stiff drink.”
“I don’t drink anymore and I haven’t for some time.” He sipped at his bottle of water. “At least I try not to. Taking it one day at a time.”
“I’m taking Preacher to see Bethany. Would you like to see her?”
“No,” he said.
“Oh.”
“Look, I know right now you’re happy with everything. You’ve gotten to see your daughter and your memories have returned. But him being here, it’s not going to end well, and you’re a fool if you think there’s any chance this will work.”
She nodded. “I don’t know what to do, Dad. I’m trying to make the right decisions here. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”
“Don’t make the right decision for everyone, make the final decision, and you know what I mean. No matter which way you look at his, sweetheart, someone is going to get hurt. Now, one person out there deserves it. Bishop as well. The other, well, he was the one who wouldn’t stop looking for you. Who wouldn’t give up on you no matter what.”
“I know.”
“I hope you make the right decision.”
“You’re really not going to come and see her? She’s your granddaughter, and she didn’t do nothing wrong.”
“I know. I know, but after tonight, I just need some space. I’m not like Preacher. I don’t trust myself.”
“Oh, okay.” It hurt knowing her father wanted nothing to do with her little girl, but she couldn’t judge him, not after everything. While she’d been taken, he’d seen everything Preacher had gone through, and she could only imagine the pain he’d witnessed.
She stepped back and returned to find Reaper and Preacher staring off at each other. Sick to her stomach, she only smiled at them. “I’m sorry to keep you guys waiting.” She didn’t anticipate a response and she rushed upstairs into the nursery.
On entering, she felt a wave of sadness that always struck her. This was supposed to be her and Preacher’s baby’s room. Was she making a mistake bringing Bethany here? Was this cruel of her, expecting Preacher to just allow another man’s child to sleep in this very room? The same room he helped her to decorate and build. Everything was all going so crazy, and she didn’t know what the hell to do anymore. Nothing made any kind of real sense to her.
Now with her memories back, the old pain and regret flooded her. Stepping up to the crib, she tried to push down her feelings. She loved Bethany. There was a love she didn’t know could even exist as she stared at her innocent child, but it was there, simmering beneath the surface. She stroked her sleeping daughter’s cheek.
She’d have loved for Bethany to wake up, to scream, to relieve the tension, but nothing.
“She’s beautiful,” Preacher said, stepping up beside the crib. “I … I bet it’s been tough for her to not have her mother with her.”
“It has, but I consoled her.” Reaper’s voice permeated the room.
Preacher gritted his teeth and all she wanted to do was reach out, hold his hands, and tell him it was going to be okay, but how the fuck could she do that when she didn’t have a clue how to deal with all of the other chaos going on in her head? Not only had her memories returned but so had this need as well. The love of both men, and that she wished she had never returned. She saw the hatred between them. Knew deep in her heart there was only one man she could be with. Bear was right. Someone was going to get hurt. If she picked Reaper, she’d always wonder about Preacher. She was torn from him even before they had a chance to be together. If she picked Preacher, Reaper’s death wouldn’t be soon after.
To many, this was an easy decision, but to Robin, it wasn’t.
When she gave birth to Bethany, she truly believed she’d never be near or see Preacher again. She never for a second thought she’d fall right back in love with him, desperate for his touch and his love.
Now, she also held that love for Reaper. Yes, there were the bad memories, of course there were, but this, it wasn’t right.
“Would you like to hold her?” Robin asked.
“When she’s awake, maybe. Excuse me.”
Preacher left the room. She listened as he talked to her father downstairs and flinched as the door to the house closed.
This was all a little too much for all of them.
Tears filled her eyes. The slamming of the door had unnerved her daughter. Humming softly to her, she made sure she felt safe.
Reaper stepped forward. He put his hands on her hips and her first instinct was to pull away but she didn’t.
“You were at the supermarket,” she said.
“I knew they were planning something for your birthday. I’ve kept a close eye on you. As much as I could without being caught.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I didn’t know if seeing Bethany would help you to remember. I knew you needed to have some catalyst.”
“It didn’t.” She blew out a breath. No, all of her memories returned when she’d stepped inside Bishop’s room. Of all the places for her to be reminded of everything that happened. At least it explained her nerves about being around Bishop.
“I know. Don’t get me wrong, I was hoping for a little of that love action to help us. You know, the shit you like reading about. Guy meets girl and all of that.”
“Don’t cuss, please.”
“You think that’s the worst Bethany is going to hear? You grew up in this world, Robin.”
“She doesn’t need you. You said that.”
“I said a lot of things, like you’d be safe, but we both know you weren’t.”
She turned toward Reaper and he groaned. “Shit, baby, don’t cry, please.”
She pulled away from him. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“I know that.” She walked over to the window.
Preacher’s bike was gone. He’d left without another word. This was all a little too much for him. “You know he could have killed you today.”
“I know, but I also know he loves you as much as I do, and he won’t do anything to make you sad or angry. It’s the way of the world. Love wins over all.”
“Does it? I’m starting to doubt that.”
“You told me that all it takes is having some faith in others. It’s why I came back here, Robin. To show you I have faith in you, in us.”
He had faith in her? Love. The one feeling that should make all others go away. Love should be easy. She no longer believed that. If love won and if it was easy, then she wouldn’t be in this predicament. She released a yawn and realized how tired she was. “I need to get some sleep. I don’t know how long she’s going to be out for.”
“Bethany sleeps well. She’s never a bother. We’ve been lucky with her.”
“Did you have other women taking care of her?”
“No, I took care of her. She’s my girl, and you know there’s no one else I’d trust with her safety. I knew you wouldn’t be happy with anyone else taking care of her.”