Either scenario didn’t end well for the Lowlanders.
But.
This could also be a golden opportunity for Shea.
On one hand, Fallon’s men were well trained, elite fighters. Shea had never seen them fight, but from what she’d seen of Fallon and his skills, she had no doubt they were lethal men.
With the element of surprise and an attack at precisely the right time from an overwhelming force, even an elite group could fall.
Shea could go home. With Fallon dead, there would be no one to exercise the penalty on Eamon, Buck and the others.
Home.
Back to Birdon Leaf. The people who had sent her on a mission knowing that she and the others would be sold into Trateri hands. People who, in the entire time she resided in their village, had not made one attempt to get to know her, show her any respect or extend even an ounce of compassion.
Of course, she didn’t have to return to Birdon Leaf. Given the village’s crimes, Shea was sure the guild would station her elsewhere.
She missed her Highlands.
But.
If she left, Fallon would die. That vexing, frustrating, man with the godlike body and a razor sharp mind would cease to exist in this world.
Shea hurt, her heart actually hurt, at the thought of never matching wits with him again. At never verbally sparring with him.
For the first time in almost longer than she could remember, Shea felt like she was a part of something. She had friends here. People she trusted. She would not, could not abandon them for a people she felt no kinship for and furthermore did not trust to have at her back.
Going home would feed a need in her. Yes. But the sad truth was that the home she wanted no longer existed. All that was left for her back there was heartbreak and disappointment.
If it had been otherwise, she would have taken one of the countless opportunities she had to escape. They had been there, over and over again, but she always found some reason to stay a little bit longer.
Feeling her decision settle around her, Shea smiled. It was bittersweet. Full of loss and hope. One path had closed to her. It had been gone a long time. She had just been too stubborn to see it. There would be no winning redemption. No rejoining the fold.
She missed her Highlands. Yes. But she knew better than anybody, home wasn’t a place; it’s a state of mind. It’s the people you’re with. And for her, those people were all here.
Perhaps, if she had truly believed that Fallon’s death would have been the better option for the Lowlands, she might have taken this easy way. But the cork was out. The Trateri wouldn’t stop coming, even with Fallon gone. She’d rather he shape what this land could be than allow others to pervert it.
Shea headed along the ridge, careful to keep her silhouette small to limit the potential of someone seeing her. At the first opportunity, she slid down the hill, moving as quietly as she could as she made her way back to camp.
Night was coming fast now. The sun had sunk behind the mountains, leaving only dim shadows behind.
Shea snuck past the two men they had left on lookout. She hadn’t been gone long and hoped they hadn’t noticed her absence. It was a faint hope, but she didn’t want to start this off with a confrontation between herself and Fallon. She needed him to believe her and the chances of that happening dwindled if he was already furious.
She had just stepped into camp when a dark form hurtled at her from the side, tackling her and sending her face down into the dirt. Rough hands yanked her arms behind her back, tying them with a rope.
The man dragged her to her feet and marched her to a trio engaged in an intense conversation. Fallon was one of those men. He looked furious.
Perhaps it had been foolish to think he might dismiss her disappearance and attribute it to the call of nature. She had a feeling the next few minutes were going to be rough.
Eamon’s advice from their first mission echoed through her mind. She really hoped this wouldn’t be the scenario he’d warned her against. She needed these men to trust her.
“Fallon,” Caden said. “Your little mouse has returned.”
The men broke off their conversation to fix her with varying degrees of threatening stares. None looked particularly relieved to see her. If anything they seemed even angrier.
“Hello,” Shea said weakly.
Fallon stepped forward, looming over her. He brushed her hair away from her face and then rubbed his thumb lightly at a spot of dirt on her cheek.
Dropping his hand, he said calmly, “Where have you been?”
“I thought I’d take a walk.”
It was the truth. Such as it was.
“A walk.”
“Yes, a walk.”
“And why did you feel you needed to take a walk?” his voice never once varied from its eerie calm.
Shea felt more anxiety from that calm tone than she would have if he’d just started yelling.
“Well.” She stopped. How could she put this in a way that would make her actions seem perfectly reasonable? “I was angry.”
“You were angry?” The first sign of emotion began to show on his face.
“Oh boy,” Caden said softly.
Shea wasn’t encouraged when he jerked his head at the other two who turned and walked away, leaving Shea facing Fallon with Caden at her back.
“Yes. You upset me when you bodily moved me from where I intended to sleep.” Remembering the events sent a thread of that same anger through her body. She might have decided she didn’t want him dead, but that didn’t mean she’d forgotten all the insults he’d piled on over the past few days.
“I see.”
He did?
Without warning, he grabbed the front of her shirt and jerked her up to his face, leaving her balancing on tiptoes as he snarled down at her.
“Do you have any idea what I would do to you if you were any other person?” He shook her. “Any other man in my army would be up on charges for abandoning a post.” Another shake. “The penalty for that is death. Death, you daft woman. You drive me mad. I could have you beaten bloody and then quartered.”
“Yes, yes. I get it,” Shea said sarcastically. She even rolled her eyes for emphasis. All of her good intentions flew the coop in the face of his fury. “You’re the big, scary warlord, and I’ve embarrassed you in front of all your men. Shame on me. Should I apologize My Lord High and Mighty?”
All of a sudden the anger drained from his face, leaving behind a man oozing lethality with every move he made, as he gently drew one finger down the column of her throat. “Is that all you think you’ve done, my fire? Embarrass me?” he chuckled, his voice sinfully low. “If you had been my Tolroi, maybe. As my aide, you’ve disobeyed me, flaunted our laws and abandoned your duty. That contains entirely different repercussions. Now what am I going to do with you?”
Shea swallowed hard, feeling his hand encircle the base of her throat, his thumb moving up and down the side of her neck in a caress that sent shivers rushing down her back.
“If I were you, I would be thanking me for coming back, especially when you hear what I have to say. I could have left. Headed for home, but I came back. To you. That should grant me some mercy.”
His eyes sharpened with interest, though he didn’t move his hand, just kept up that maddening caress.
Receiving a slight nod to continue, Shea said, “There’s an ambush coming. I’m not sure where or how many men lie in wait, but I know there are men posed to strike.”